


Heartbeat

by awriterwithnostory



Category: Twilight (Movies), Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Angst and Romance, Book: New Moon, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Fanfiction, Fluff and Angst, Major Original Character(s), Minor Character(s), Movie: Breaking Dawn Part 2, Original Character(s), Post-Canon, Protectiveness, Relationship(s), Romance, Soulmates, Vampires, Volturi, Work In Progress, movie: eclipse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-29
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:09:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 91,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28410684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/awriterwithnostory/pseuds/awriterwithnostory
Summary: "Watch your tongue." He murmured dangerously as he trailed his nose along my collar bone. The pounding of my heart was picking up speed and his eyes grew darker with every beat."You first."~-~ Based On A True Story ~-~Her entire life, all Saffiya Civello ever wanted was for something exciting to happen to her.As she sets out on a mission to uncover the truth behind her father's disappearance, she becomes a prisoner of the Volturi. Her condition of CIP (an insensitivity to pain) heightens her risk of staying alive as she finds herself surrounded by vampires. As she struggles to navigate the coven's unique members, her impending death, and testing the limits of a certain witch twin's powers, she searches for clues to her father's disappearance.Now, Saffiya must find a way to escape the Volturi and the only thing standing in her way may be the one thing that could change her mind - a pull to the most dangerous vampire in existence: Alec Volturi.On-going
Relationships: Alec (Twilight)/Original Character(s), Alec (Twilight)/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 55





	1. Saffiya

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Saffiya begins her journey.

**A** ir filled my lungs as I revelled in the purity of the world around me.

Above me, clouds as white as snow were suspended in a sea of ocean blue. The view might as well have flown off of the pages in a children's book. The breeze weaved itself through my hair and tickled my cheek and I let my head slowly fall back. It was idyllic and I had never appreciated it until today.

Around me, an ancient building rose up from the earth on four sides. Built from bricks and spotted with lovely vines of ivy, it was almost as grand as a castle. The sky met the steeple, the highest point of the building which was designated with a cross placed in the same way as with an angel on a Christmas tree. Below it was the clocktower with a bell that chimed loud enough to induce a migraine.

The cloister hallways that surrounded me would echo with every step and an archway in the middle of each of the four walls granted access to the gravel path where I was sat. The path was surrounded by the greenest grass you've ever seen, always perfectly cut and it had never been walked on. Which made it all the more tempting to do so.

I was in the center of the courtyard — a garden designed to be a 3 foot tall maze of flowers took up most of the open area. The colours that made it up could give the rainbow a run for its' money. Between the lavender, the roses, and the dashes of other attractive flowers that I did not know the names of, the senses were so overwhelmed that they eventually evened out to become somewhat subtle. I hardly noticed it anymore.

Though it wasn't a particularly complicated maze, my younger self would attempt to zoom through it as if racing an invisible playmate. My goal was always to reach the middle, where a stature of Mother Mary rested. For some reason, I found comfort in sitting and looking up at her. Perhaps, because I'd never known my own mother and wasn't Mary supposed to be everyone's mum?

I'd never bought into religion much, despite being raised half my life by a faction of nuns. I had tried, really I had, but the fantasies in my head provided me more structure and satisfaction. The nuns never pushed belief on me and I think I'd be more devout if I had been introduced to religion as a child than as a pre-teen. Still, I followed the daily schedules and attended mass and prayer (most of the time). It was a part of my life and while my life was lovely, it wasn't enough.

I still had Mary and she was there whether I believed in her son or not. The first time I found her I was crying and alone. When I had discovered her in the middle of the maze, I'd been so struck with fascination that I had stumbled into the flower beds behind me. Rose bushes.

The nuns found me a few minutes later, where I was still staring up at her with thorns in my hands from trying to catch my fall. One or two in my shoulder and my legs. They fretted over me and tried to carefully pluck them out when they noticed that I had no reaction to the feeling.

It was called CIP - congenital insensitivity to pain.

My entire life, I'd lived without ever experiencing physical pain. Which is great — in theory. In practice, however, dangerous and literally, scarring. When I was three, I ended up with third degree burns after leaving my hands on a stovetop without ever realising that I was burning the skin off of my hands. I wasn't clumsy, it was just that bumps and bruises were almost as natural as meal times for me.

To put it into perspective for you, here's an example. The part of your brain that rationally reminds you to not punch a wall because it would hurt does not exist for me. If you did punch a wall hard enough, you'd get bruises, maybe blood on your knuckles if you were angry or strong enough. But, you would feel it because it would hurt. Maybe you wouldn't be able to write with that hand for a bit or brushing it against your bedsheets would make it sting.

That pain wouldn't register in my brain. I could keep punching the wall until I broke every bone in my hand and I wouldn't feel a thing. To be completely straight with you, the life expectancy for people like me wasn't particularly high due to the accumulation of health issues and injuries. Still, there were benefits.

Before leaving me at the abbey, I'd traveled the world with my father. He was a brilliant man, with the brazen and charming contradictions of a showman and a pattern of opportunistic behaviour. My father was a notoriously avaricious cannibal — a con man, who cleverly used my condition to his advantage.

When I was growing up, we'd create cons centred around my inability to feel pain, finding guilt and pity to be excellent motivators to throw half your salary at a stranger.

There was an awful lot of risk involved for me, despite my condition, as traditional cons such as "The Flop", involved stepping in front of a car and exaggerating what was really usually only a minor hit. My youth meant less hesitation on the target's part and typically more money. For those that were reluctant and insisted on calling an ambulance, my medical history included an extensive list of injuries that helped rake in the insurance money.

Since I couldn't feel the pain from being bumped by a car, we were able to take steps to make it more believable and I'd just be fixed up by the docs. Was it reckless? Absolutely. Did it work? 78% of the time.

Maybe he wasn't the best father, but he loved me.

When he left me with the nuns of Santo Domingo de Silos, he promised to come back for me. Only, it's been five years and no one has heard from him since. The easy answer would be that he'd abandoned me, but I knew this couldn't be true. With each day my hopes only grew, until I had decided that I was sick of waiting.

Presently, I picked at my fingernails and lifted my head back up to eye the stone woman. I always found Mary's statue when I was lonely. It was a disparately one-sided relationship but I still considered her to be a friend, of sorts. I'd spend hours sitting beside her, entertaining myself with a book or a puzzle. Despite its lack of privacy, the garden maze was where I went to be alone.

This is why I was resting here at the moment. I was settling myself in the ease of the world and reminiscing about my time at the abbey before I left it behind. Mary was physically weathered and silent as always as she gazed down at me. In my mind, she was whispering words of encouragement. But she was only stone.

Footsteps on the gravel alerted me to approaching company and I raised my hand to block the sun from my eyes as a voice lilted through the air.

"Are you ready?" I nodded, spinning around and lifting myself to my feet. "You've got your passport? Toothbrush? Money for the train?"

"Yup, all that's left is Mary here. Help me stuff her in my bag, will you?"

Sister Misha's lips pursed as she gave me a sour look that suggested she was clearly not impressed. Though she was one of the youngest of the nuns, she'd entered the convent not long after her twentieth birthday. From the day I arrived she acted as my guardian angel, using her free time in between mass and prayers to care for me.

My early days at the abbey are filled with memories of her plaiting my hair while humming a psalm from the morning mass. Bedtime stories were her own recounts of history and she would fill my bookshelf with worldly adventures, classics, and Shakespeare. None of the other nuns were quite so refined or old fashioned, even the older ones. It was just Misha.

She sighed, a hint of a smile growing on her face as she raised a hand to cup my cheek. "Just don't go looking for trouble and it won't find you." It wasn't a fair thing to ask of me and she knew it. The very nature of my mission was going to require some skills I hadn't used in a long time. Skills that were less than honourable but with good intentions, and that was enough for me. I had nothing to lose.

"I'm not familiar with that passage — is it Luke?" She lightly tapped my cheek in a fond form of comeuppance. She was far too used to my witty comments and while she tried to appear unamused, I had no doubt she found it too endearing to not appreciate my humour.

"Cheeky girl," she marvelled. However, she was still frowning as she asked me in a breathy voice, "Saffiya, are you positive that you want to do this?"

"He could be in trouble." Every time I said it I'd be gifted the same pitiful look, doubt evident in their eyes. For nuns, they seemed to have such little faith. I knew my father was out there. I just didn't know where.

The day he left was a blur. I can remember hushed voices before I was swept up into the arms of one of the nuns and promptly carried away from my father. No explanation, no proper goodbye — he was just gone. Every day I waited for him to return. But he never came.

A tug on my shoulders brought me back to Misha as the nun pulled me into her arms in a tight hug. I laughed, dropping my bag from my shoulder and wrapping my arms around her in return, "I'm going to miss you."

When she finally released me, she reached out and clutched my hand, noticing the gauze taped loosely to my palm. I had kind of been hoping she wouldn't notice, but I knew it was a long shot. She gasped, flipping my hand over to examine it. The night before, I'd tried to make soup and while reaching above the stove for a pot, I'd set my hand down for a few seconds. Alright, maybe a little more than a few seconds, but it wasn't the worst injury I'd ever had. "It's fine. I promise."

I wasn't sure why she was still surprised when I appeared with a band aid on my arm or a few bruises on my legs. She'd treated enough of them herself to be prepared for such an event. Misha mutters something incoherent in Spanish and gently drops my hand. Side by side, we made our way to the front of the abbey where the sisters had gathered to see me off.

There were no more hugs exchanged, but many of them whispered a sweet word or two, a "good luck" or a "stay safe". Sister Anne, a nun in her early sixties, brushed my hair out of my face with a gentle smile. A few others performed the sign of the cross over me with no words. It was a gesture that made my heart swell despite myself.

After I'd given a goodbye to each of the nuns, there was a beat before they began to part like the red sea as another woman joined us. They moved as if it had been choreographed and a few of the nuns reached out to touch her, as if she were an antique that you took off of the shelf maybe once a year, if only to admire its existence. Though each step she took matched pace with her cane, she hardly relied on it as she shuffled elegantly through the nuns.

Misha stepped aside, allowing me to meet the faded green eyes of the Mother Superior. Lines decorated her face like an expressionist painting. The short, deep lines above the bridge of her nose made it appear as if she were squinting. Her eyebrows, thin ivory hairs laced with a darker silver, brought closer to their twin with age. Perhaps her ageing youth had provided it, but there always seemed to be a glow around her. She was like a light, full of wisdom and the epitome of integrity.

I knelt my head in respect and recognition, "Mother Abbess." Before I could offer it, she took my hand in her own, paper thin and withered, and I realized that I would miss the transparent veins and spots on her hands that I'd studied so much as a young girl. Out of childish jealousy I had wished for my own while she gave a throaty laugh, promising that one day I would.

She watched me for a moment before the noachian woman enveloped me in a warm embrace. I eagerly returned it, as affection such as this was rare from the Mother Superior. I had spent years attempting to attain an interaction like this and it only made the moment more bittersweet.

I regained my composure once she'd pulled away, watching as she delicately lifted her rosary from her neck and placed it over mine. "So your new life will know that God watches over you. And so you may never forget where you are from." I began to blink quickly as I lifted the cross of the rosary. I swallowed as I gazed upon the small, pale pink pearls and my chest felt like it was going to implode. This was all a lot harder than I had expected it to be.

"Thank you," I managed to croak out. Beside me, Misha grabbed my non-burnt hand in a final goodbye. "For everything." I lifted my bag over one shoulder from where I'd placed it on the ground and waved awkwardly at the group of women.

Then, I began my journey. Yet, every step towards the front gates of the abbey seemed to be harder to take. As if each time I took another step, my foot sank into an invisible puddle of mud. Every step out felt like a suction cup out of the mud, requiring strength I barely had. I knew I shouldn't look back because I wasn't sure if I could leave if I did.

I had hardly set foot outside of the abbey since the day I arrived. It had never truly occurred to me how desperately I longed for the rest of the world. The people, the food, and because my father and I had essentially lived nomadically, there was always an adventure around the corner. I longed for an adventure and this was it.

I couldn't help but glance over my shoulder to take in the miraculous place I'd called home the last few years and the women who made it so. I bit my lip, stopping in my tracks.

It was then that I noticed the Mother Superior's face had become graver as she issued me a final piece of advice. "Be careful, Saffiya. Not everything is as it seems."

I nodded, making to turn around before she spoke again, "and for goodness sake child, stop biting your lip." A few of the nuns began to giggle as I was chastised for possibly the last time.

I felt my face widen into a large grin, my courage returned to me as I left the abbey behind.

I don't remember if I planned to return. I like to think I would've, if only for a visit. Reader, I'd be lying if I said that I was glad I didn't know the end of my story that day. Y

et, I know that even if my fate were crystal clear, nothing would have stopped me from finding my father. Even if it cost me my life.

And as I now know...it would.


	2. Saviour

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Saffiya arrives in Volterra and meets a mysterious stranger.

_My darling Saffiya,_

_An old friend of mine has a lead on a major job. It could be really good for us, Princess. I promise you, our lives are going to change for the better. Just you wait. See you soon!_

  
_Miss and love you,_

  
_Dad_

  
_**S** ee you soon. _

My fingers brushed over the ink. As if the ghost of his pen would somehow bring me closer to him. The handwriting was large and harsh, as if every word that he wrote was a sentence behind the one in his head.

 _See you soon_ meant that my father hadn't abandoned me. I was right all along.

 _See you soon_ meant that he planned on coming back.

So, why didn't he? The question had been repeating itself in my head all the way from the hostel to the train station in Monte Carlo. But I found that dwelling on the numerous possibilities only made it worse. 

Even so, as I sat beside an overgrown potato on a day bus to Volterra, the question burned in my mind. Along with a multitude of others that the letter's very existence raised, most of which I would never get the answers for. Not long after I had left, Misha called to inform me that the Mother Abbess had died in her sleep and they'd found the letter addressed to me in the bottom of one of her desk drawers.

_"I think it's from your father."_

I'd been in Monte Carlo for a week, surviving on an elementary understanding of the language and a quickly diminishing supply of money when the letter finally arrived. The Sister had sent it inside a larger envelope and the original letter appeared to have been unopened. It was dated only a few months after he had left me at the abbey and postmarked from some random city in Italy.

See you soon...

_Misha had picked up the phone on the fourth ring. "Saffiya! How is Monte Carlo—"_

_"Did you know?"_

_"Did I know what?"_

_"The letter. Di...did you know?"_

_There was silence on the other line before she answered, "I did."_

_My legs gave out as I slipped down the wall and crashed to the ground, tugging the phone cord with me. Her words became babble in my ears, a mere buzz of meditative tones that did nothing to ease my pain._

_"We were trying to protect you, little one. When there were no other letters, I thought we'd made the right decision, but—"_

_"I can't..."_

_"—never meant to hurt you, little one."_

_"Goodbye, Misha."_

_"Saffiya — Please!"_

_My eyes grew cloudy and I dropped the phone, letting it bang against the wall as it hung upside down on its cord. Misha's cries became more desperate as she realized I was no longer listening._

_Instead, I was grabbing my bag, checking for my passport, and slamming the door on my way out._

The memory of her disembodied cries rang in my ears. I pushed them aside. I had bigger things to worry about.

I was aware of the odds. It'd been five years since the nuns had received my father's letter. If he never sent another...I shuttered in my seat. I refused to even entertain the obvious answer. 

Still, I was hesitant.

Was I doing the right thing? This letter got me further on my father's case than I could have ever hoped. I was one large step closer to finding out what had happened to my father. And it pissed me off because now that I was here I couldn't help but wonder if I even wanted to know.

Was it easier not knowing? Would I be better off calling Misha, apologising and going home? 

Could I live the rest of my life not without knowing — having gotten this far and then giving up? There was a high chance that ignorance would be the best decision at this point, at least in the long run.

But I knew I would never be able to let it go. I had to know.

The bus rolled to a stop in an open courtyard at the bottom of the city. The man beside me stirred, snorting himself out of sleep.

The windows had been taking heavy fire from the rain for the entirety of the bus ride. Despite the mix of different languages, I had no doubt that every single conversation was commenting on it. As was human nature, but the thought amused me as many of the tourists rushed off the bus and into the nearest hotels. Instead of joining them, I slipped my hood over my head and began my trek up into the city.

The cobblestone streets were busy with people packing up shops or rushing home to escape the rain. They all seemed lighthearted about it though, unlike the tourists who acted scared to death of water falling from the sky. I twisted and winded up the streets under beautiful stone arches and shop windows. Each home and entrance was seemingly carved into the old brick walls. I could feel myself falling in love with Volterra the way people fall in love with cities. 

It wasn't until the rain had soaked through my jacket and my hair started to stick to my face that I decided to slip into a pub. It seemed to be the only place still open and I'd never been in a pub before.

On the outside, it was a surprisingly dodgy shack of a building when compared to the rest of the city. The inside wasn't much different...perhaps only slightly more homey.

Photographs lined the walls with images of, I assumed, customers. From young to old, families to friends, it seemed that the pub was quite a local spot. Booths surrounded the outer lane of the space, tables and chairs popped in wherever there was space. None of the furniture was new, only barely a step above classic. But it all meshed well, each element pulled together by the large collection of alcohols with fancy labels neatly arranged on shelves behind the bar. 

It was nice, I decided.

The bartender eyed me carefully and I realized that I was still standing in the doorway. I smiled sheepishly at her before walking to the far end of the bar and sitting down. As if she were my shadow, she moved to stand opposite me on the other side of the bar. She spoke with a throaty voice, something in Italian. I had no idea what she'd said, but it was beautiful.

"I'm so sorry, I don't speak Italian." 

She huffed dramatically, "what do you want?"

"Oh...err. Water, please." She rolled her eyes as she turned away mumbling, "too many Americans tonight." She said it in English, so clearly she didn't care if I heard her. I didn't bother to correct her, as the comment made me look around. I spotted a group of boys in a booth that I hadn't noticed before. They were a bit rowdy, so I'm not sure how I missed them. 

One of them noticed me staring and hit one of his friends. All three of them were now watching me before one of them winked and I quickly turned my head back as the bartender set my glass in front of me.

She watched me then eyed the boys, her previously irritated face now softer as she turned back to me. "No good, from men like that."

I frowned slightly, unsure of what she meant exactly and my innocence seemed to confound her.

I glanced casually around the room, trying to remain inconspicuous as I scoped out the patrons. I had no idea how I was supposed to find this friend of my father's. I didn't even have a name. But I'd come all this way and I couldn't give up now. I could always just ask someone and maybe the universe would let me catch a break. 

If there was a reward for taking leaps of faith based on less than nothing, I'd win it hands down.

One of the boys let out a "woot!" and slammed a bottle on the ground as his friends cheered him. The sound of glass breaking made me jump and the bartender shouted something in Italian.

"Out!"

The boys stood with smirks, one of them throwing a few euros on the table. One of them threw a nasty smile at me before he joined his friends, all three waltzing with arrogance out the door.

The bartender grabbed a broom and dust pan from behind the bar and walked out to clean up the boys' mess. I quickly got up to help her.

"Grazie"

"They were jerks." She laughed in agreement and I was glad I made her smile. As I glanced back down, my eyes were drawn towards one of the pictures on the wall. Freezing for an instant, I went to remove the photograph from its place before thinking better of the idea. I didn't need a closer look, anyways. I was positive.

In the picture, three people were seated at one of the circular booths in the bar. A woman sat on one end, smiling sheepishly at the camera. Opposite her was a much shorter man and although he was smiling, he still had a grumpy aura. The man in the middle had a huge grin on his face and he was looking at the woman. 

It was my father. He was younger than I remembered, but I could never mistake him.

I tapped the picture harshly and searched for the bartender's eyes. "Do you know this man?" She seemed offset by my insistence and I realized I'd been sending this woman through a rollercoaster of emotions all evening. She quickly recovered, shaking her head.

"I know man next to him."

"Do you know where I can find him?" She gave me another look at the audacity of the personal questions. "Please, it's really important."

She shrugged, "he left for a fishing trip two days ago, back tonight. You'll find him in here before anywhere else."

"Thank you — so much — grazie."

"You're bleeding." I looked down at my finger which was, in fact, bleeding. I glanced down to the dust pan full of glass and found the culprit.

"It's fine. I can't feel it anyways." Nevertheless, I returned to my bag and pulled out a bandaid, quickly taking care of the small cut. "Thank you again, for your help." I set one of my last few euros on the bar. She nodded, watching me leave her bar with a newfound determination.

The streets were bare when I stepped outside. I couldn't have been in there for that long. But the sun had just barely gone down and with it, every Volterra citizen. It felt too early for the sun to set, but I couldn't be sure of the time. There was an extra chill in the air, paired with the low whistle of wind finding its way down the narrow streets of the city.

The rain had slowed to a drizzle and while my jacket had dried off significantly, its damp nature plus the wind made the cold even more intense. If the man was returning tonight, maybe I should have just waited in the pub. I stopped off at a bench and after weighing the pros and cons, shoved the jacket into my backpack. I was able to lift it back onto my shoulder and look up just in time to see a light flicker off in one of the houses.

It might as well have been a warning, because not a second later was my shoulder grabbed. I spun around to come face to face with one of the boys from the pub. "Boo."

I stumbled back, coming into contact with one of his friends.

"It's our lucky night, boys."

The one behind me grabbed under my shoulders and the others tried to pick up my feet. I grunted, throwing my head backwards into the guy's face. He shouted out, letting me go and messing up his buddies' balance. I half jumped away from them and began to run. I could hear their footsteps join mine as I turned down a street. A dead end. How utterly predictable. 

My stomach dropped with an overwhelming feeling of dread. They had me cornered. The first one took a step closer to me until I felt the pressure of the wall on my back. I could feel my chest heaving up and down, my breathing increased with the pounding of my heart.

He leaned closer to me and before I could think it through, I spit in his face. In a last ditch effort, I tried to take the opportunity and run. I'd hardly gone a few inches before one of his buddies helped him pull me back and I was right back where I started.

"That wasn't very nice.”

He was thrown away from me in an instant. I thought for a second that maybe one of his buddies had grown a pair, but they were flying backwards in their own directions. I watched as they landed, realizing with a harsh intake of breath that they were dead before they hit the ground.

That was when I saw him. He must have been my saviour but in the moment he presented himself as anything but. He stood between me and the men, all three on the ground. His face was hidden under a black cloak but he seemed to be watching me. I opened my mouth to say something but before I could even blink he appeared in front of me, a hand over my mouth. 

My hand immediately went to remove his but he caught it with his other free one. He wasn't looking at me, instead his eyes seemed focused on my band aid. And his eyes, they looked black. Except, that wasn't possible.

Without warning, he shoved himself away from me as if I'd attacked him. "What are you doing to me?" His voice was husky, intense and I think I could actually feel my heartbeat increasing. Good question.

He let out a groan that was oddly lustful as he breathed in the air around him and took one step towards me. Automatically, I pushed myself as far back against the wall as I could. Clearly muscle memory from the last five minutes of repeated male dominance. Only, my reaction seemed to pull him out of a trance and he stopped. A small noise from the corner attracted both of our attention. One of them was still alive.

I blinked and suddenly, my so called saviour was across the alley. He had the frontman of my attackers pressed against the opposite wall and I could've sworn he was kissing him. Except, his lips seemed to be at the man's neck. Before I could react, he moved away and the man's body fell to the ground in a heap.   
  
My saviour raised his head to look at me, blood staining his lips.

"You idiot." We were joined by three more dark capes, blocking my only exit out. One of them threw her hood back as she hissed at the boy, "what have you done?"

The third one, a man, added, "Aro will be furious.”

But he didn't answer them. He was looking straight at me. His hood had fallen, yet I could hardly make out his features through the darkness. Except his eyes. Which now barely passed as red and I wondered how I could have confused such a colour with black. My mind was in such disarray that it hadn't even processed the events in front of me yet. It was like I was stuck, because I couldn't tear my eyes away from him either.

"What's done is done," the man continued. "Let's just kill the girl and —“

That got him to move.

The boy was crouched in front of me, as if ready to pounce on his friends if they suggested such a thing again.

The smallest cape stepped forward and the other two seemed to shrink away to give her the floor. The boy relaxed in her stead, rising from his previous position. They watched each other for a second, as if having their own conversation that the rest of us weren't privy to. "If you insist, brother. Aro can decide what we'll do with her." She turned on her heel without giving anyone the chance to oppose her. The boy turned to face me.

I was looking up at him with wide eyes and although my stomach was overflowing with butterflies...I had the oddest wave of peace. And for a moment, it felt like I was standing in front of Mary's statue back at the nunnery. I bit my lip and broke contact, unnerved by the unexpected emotion.

"Demetri, clean it up.”

"But he —“

I couldn't see her face, but whatever was on it must have frightened him because he nodded. The smaller girl continued to lead the way out of the alley. Immediately, Demetri went to my attackers, their bodies discarded on the ground and the lack of sympathy I felt for them threw me off. He began tossing one and then two over his shoulders as I watched.

The boy moved to block my view and quickly lifted me into his arms. The same thumping pressure in my ear alerted me to the increasing pace of my heart. "Could you please stop that?" 

I heard a snicker come from the other vampire — Demetri, I had learned. Before I could ask him exactly what I was doing wrong, we were flying.

At least, it felt like flying. The wind whipped the air around us and I couldn't hear anything but its whistle. I tried to open my eyes to see but his hold on me tightened so I was facing his chest. 

The next second, I was standing in an entrance hall. It was ancient and I'm no architect, but I was pretty sure that between the pillars and the arches and the golden rectangles that there was a multitude of styles thrown in to the building. It was all marble though and the only sound was the heels of the two cloaked women as they led the way to eccentrically large doors. The smaller girl opened it and I marvelled at what I assumed had to be super strength.

Super strength. Speed. Blood? Had somebody spiked my water? 

I blinked. My surroundings pulling me back in to their reality as the marble walls seemed to fold in on themselves. We were now standing in a circular room. It could've been a ballroom, except the three thrones that were front and center suggested another purpose. Men and women in light grey cloaks stood spaced around the circular hall. All face forward and watching me with straight faces, though some of them let slip a hint of curiosity at my presence. 

I faltered in my steps, but a hand on the small of my back kept me steady and moving forward. I looked over my shoulder to see it was the same boy, his face forward and empty, unblinking.

But that wasn't what I noticed. He was beautiful — otherworldly. It wasn't natural but apparently it was because they were all stunning. Everyone in the room. And I don't just mean stunning like attractive, I meant stunning like the literal definition. Stunning like Hermione Granger pointed her wand at me and yelled "stupify!". Stunning, like walking into a room and seeing your parents getting it on. Stunning in the same way that normal people desired to be supermodels, only they were what supermodels desired to be. All of them.

Even the three men at the front. One, with eyebrows tilted down in a cynical yet inquisitive stare. The middle one, now standing, pale as his counterparts but with a smile on his face that was as greedy as it was unsettling. The third, white as a sheet, even more so than the others, and face empty as a supermodel. He reminded me of Mother Abbess. 

Mother Abbess. Misha. _My father._

The man standing sighed as I met his eyes for the first time. Red. Like blood. What the hell was going on here?

"Alec, child. What have you done?"


	3. Reparations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Saffiya is introduced to the Volturi.

" **A** lec, I am disappointed with you."

"Alec." The name tasted foreign on my tongue, like when you've gone to a new country and eaten the food they're famous for after only eating knock-off versions in chain restaurants for years. It was like honey, in its evolution from the jar to the taste in your tea. It sent shivers down my spine and I didn't realise I'd said the name out loud until the ancient man in the right throne lifted his head, watching me intensely. But he still looked sad. He looked sad in the way a homeless man not asking for change looked. I had the urge to sit beside him in contemplation for hours, as if the company of one in silence would make him feel a little bit better.

The man in front of me had a growing grin on his face at my previous words and he was eyeing the boy behind me. Alec spoke clearly, "parce mihi pater." He moved away from me and offered the man his hand. The man took it eagerly, closing his eyes as if Alec's hand was a new piece of music and he wanted to focus on it.

After a moment, he tittered with excitement and released the boy's hand. Without a glance at me, Alec joined the small girl off to the side of the room. Though, now that we were closer I could see she wasn't much different in size than me. She was young, but probably around the same age as the boy — Alec. He didn't so much as look at me, but he was seemed a little more than upset with the situation.

The girl, however, was watching me with almost as much focus as the ancient man. She was wearing a completely blank face, with her eyes betraying an almost bewildered state of curiosity. When she noticed me watching her, her eyes flickered back to the man in front of me and the emotion disappeared. Perhaps it was never there.

The third throne guy spoke up, as if annoyed by my very existence, "Aro." Aro seemed to ignore him and he raised his hand as if asking for mine.

When I didn't comply, he spoke, "You have nothing to fear right now, dear one. I only want to see if your experience was similar to our beloved Alec." Right now. Did he think that would convince me?

I could see that I didn't particularly have a choice. I held my hand out and he met me halfway, the same look appearing on his face as it had with Alec. He took his time making friends with my hand before releasing it and I pulled it to my chest, as if to protect it.

"Et petram, ex saxum." Except it wasn't Aro who spoke. It was the relic in the left corner.

They were both looking to Alec, whose face hardened at the meaning the Latin words must have held. "It appears so, brother." They all stood in contemplation, switching their gazes between me and the boy, who definitely wanted me to disappear.

I tended to agree. "Look, err...thank you for saving me, lovely to make your acquaintance, but I've got things to do, so if someone could show me the way out—" I began to turn around but once I did, two men moved from the wall to block my path. And I say moved as in they made teleportation look like technology of the past. "Right, what are you?"

The blond one hissed, "is she slow as well, then?"

"Actually, yes. And that's rude," I shot back at him and the shock on their faces allowed me to continue. "But I want confirmation."

Aro let out a stuttering laugh. "She is a breath of fresh air, is she not?" He was as giddy as a child with a new toy. "They make a lovely match, don't you think Caius?" Caius rolled his eyes, turning away as if now bored and placing his head gracefully on his propped up hand.

"So long as he doesn't eat her first." Someone muttered behind me. I was completely and one hundred percent lost as to the purpose of their banter. The topic and all of its implications flying right over my head.

Aro ignored them and answered me, "vampires, my dear. All further questions will be answered, but first..." He took my hand again, closing his eyes. He almost looked peaceful for a moment. When he opened them again, he continued talking, which must have been a hobby of his. "There is something intriguing in you, dear one." He was addressing me as if I were a child and to him, I guess I may as well have been. "I wonder if we might try...a test of sorts." He didn't wait for my permission, instead taking a few steps back from me.

"Jane," he said, turning to the girl in the corner, but he wasn't looking at her. He was looking straight at Alec.

Nevertheless, she fixed her gaze on me, just as concentrated as before but void of emotion.

Nothing happened. Although it felt like something should be happening. She was definitely expecting something to be happening. Maybe there was a delay. Maybe it was some kind of code — should I be responding to her?

Then, I felt it...a slight pressure that began to envelop my body but still, nothing too bothersome. Except, the pressure grew into a light prickling all over my body, like what I assumed it was supposed to feel like when doctors jabbed a needle in your thumb.

And it hurt more than I think a pin prick was supposed to, but I've never actually felt it before so it was hard to tell. I can tell you that I didn't like whatever it was. I began to scratch my arms, seeing if it would go away with some outside action like when your foot falls asleep and the feeling went away.

"Err...ouch?" She looked just as surprised as I did and I realized that she was the one who had made it stop. Did that mean she could do it again?

She growled - actually growled. Not a low, warning growl, but more of a howl of angst and frustration. Then, she lunged at me.

I had barely shrunk my body away in a poor attempt to protect myself before she was stopped as the boy beside her placed a hand on her arm. "Sister." She met his eyes and reluctantly did as she was told, returning to her stance and fixing me with the darkest glare I've ever seen someone give. Dang, she was scary and yet, I wondered what she was like when she wasn't angry.

"I wonder," Aro muttered and turned expectantly to the boy again. Alec blinked before nodding in the same way a small child would after getting caught with their hand in the cookie jar. As if he were accepting a punishment.

I suddenly became very aware of my feet standing on the marble floor. I could feel the harshness of the material through the worn down soles of my shoes and the way it made me shift from side to side. The end of my jeans tickled my shins and the denim was rough against my skin as the nuns had bought them for me just before I left and they'd still not softened with use. My hipbone was slightly exposed as my t-shirt had been offset no doubt from the recent events and I could feel the cool in the air.

The cool air, which had caused goosebumps on my skin but caused me no mind. The pumping of blood in my ears and the weight of my eyelids. My lips as they brushed against one another. The rise and fall of my chest and its' pressure on my ribcage. The only sound in the entire room seemed to be my breathing and the air being used tasted bitter on my tongue.

The last thing I saw were Alec's eyes — returned to an empty noir, before everything vanished.

The floor had fallen out from under me. I tried to ball my hands in a fist, except I couldn't feel my fingertips touching my own skin. I gagged on the air that flooded into my throat as I gasped. Only, I couldn't hear myself choking and I wondered if I was doing it at all. If I existed at all. If I ever had or if I ever would again...

My heart started to pick up speed and almost immediately, my senses returned. I fell to the floor, grasping at my throat and taking in as much air as I could, desperate to feel real again. When I'd settled, I looked up at my captors. Alec's eyes were cast downward and I couldn't really tell behind their capes but his sister was standing closer to him and I think she'd grabbed his hand.

"Truly remarkable." He turned his back on me and announced to his brothers, "we'll keep her. Human, for now, I think."

Caius hissed, "why wait?"

"In time, Brother." Aro threw over his shoulder to satisfy his co-worker. Caius growled, and I had a feeling patience wasn't one of this guy's virtues.

Keep me? I'm not a pet. "I can't stay here. There's someone counting on me —"

Aro looked back at me, nodding thoughtfully, "ahh yes, your father."

Okay, weird because I didn't tell him that but I decided that wasn't as important as the matter in hand. "Yes. Listen, you can do whatever you want with me but I need two, three days max." Nobody moved. "Please."

Aro turned fully to face me again, his hands folded in front of him. And though his voice held sincerity, his face lacked empathy of any kind. "I am afraid that will not be possible. Unfortunately, your time with humans came to an end the moment Alec exposed our kind to you."

"You don't understand —"

"You stay. Or you die." Caius hissed. "Your choice."

The nuns had always told me I was stubborn and impulsive, but I never realized how much until that moment. "Then I die." I didn't really want to die, but maybe they'd prefer preservation of a life and let me go. Then, I remembered where I was standing and with whom I was standing.

Freaking vampires. I mean, get real.

It was Jane who growled at my response.

"I agree with Jane. An ultimatum is hardly fair considering the situation. The child is tired. She should become acquainted before her new life begins."

I opened my mouth, as if to argue or question again but before I could, Aro was directly in front of me. "For now, dear one." Ruby eyes met mine once more and I stared as defiantly as I could right back into them. "Vetus et Somniabunt." He nodded to my right, and the pale hand of Alec gripped my arm. It was no longer gentle and timid as it had been before. This time it was rough, unkind and I no longer felt any kind of safety. I immediately flinched away from him, but his grip never left me.

This was all his fault. "Don't touch me."

He ignored me, basically dragging me out of the room. The large stone door slammed shut behind us and I stumbled trying to keep up with the boy. "You're hurting me," I threw in lamely. It was a lie. For all I knew he was cutting off the circulation in my arm but he didn't seem to care as he pulled me through the corridors of the castle.

There were old paintings of ballerinas and random people in intricate canvases lining the walls, but we didn't stop for a tour. I continued to throw complaints and insults at him, though they slowly lost their passion as we continued on.

"Let me go, you tart!"

He refused to acknowledge me and a new burst of annoyance allowed my profanities to grow worse and worse in nature the further we went until I was just throwing them around for the heck of it, "devil spawn". So, maybe my version of profanity was a little old fashioned but could you blame me?

Still, it seemed to be the only one that caught his attention. He stopped abruptly and pulled my arm closer to him as if he wanted to rip it out of its socket and my body followed. I looked up at him.

He was quite handsome. Aside from what I assumed was a vampiric makeover, I imagine he would still have the same high cheekbones and classic jawline. Like Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic, the ghost of boyhood would forever stain his cheeks. Purposefully tousled hair, black as his eyes, made you want to run your fingers through it. A thought that immediately clouded me with shame before I was distracted by the length of his eyelashes. He was lovely, and even though his eyes belonged in a horror film, they were no different than any other human's. I could see into them and I swear there was a touch of humanity. In them, I could see the potential for emotion, of anger and concern, of fear and care. Humorous or snarky, peaceful…

But right now, he looked mad. Like, really really mad. The kind of mad that only appeared as a defence mechanism and was followed with irrational actions. For someone who had had blood dripping from his mouth only an hour or so ago, I decided that he was way too close for my liking. So, I continued to struggle until a growl ripped through his throat.

"Stop that."

I stuck my bottom lip out like a petulant child, "no."

He leaned closer to me and his eyes locked with mine. I felt as if we'd returned to that alley, because I couldn't move and I think I forgot how to breathe. Yet, none of that mattered and for a moment, I thought he was lost in the same trance that I was. That is, until he spoke. His voice as slow and dark as I imagined his soul to be.

"Do you feel your heartbeat, human?" I did. It was pounding against my chest and I wondered if this was enough stress to induce a heart attack in my sixteen year old self.

He leaned over me and wrenched open a door, pushing me carelessly inside. I landed on the floor, rolling twice as if I were going down a hill, before pushing myself to my knees.

I met his eyes once more as he glared down at me in superiority. "Challenge me one more time and I'll make sure it never beats again." All the fear that should've been driving my instincts for the last hour hit me with his words. I exhaled what sounded like a single choked up sob and he smirked in satisfaction at my reaction, pulling the door shut as he left me. Wow, he really sucked.

As soon as I was alone, I expected tears to come. But my eyes were so dry they almost itched. I slowly curled myself into a ball on the carpet, bringing my arms to wrap around my knees.

I took in the room around me. Elegant, extravagant, and dramatic as hell-o. The bed had four posts and a canopy, the style you only really saw when you toured one of those French castles. Or so I assumed. All I really remembered from my father and I's day trip to Versailles was convincing the daughter of our current mark that if her daddy bought the castle she'd be considered a real princess. Yes, my father tried to sell Versailles. Twice. Whether one or both of those business men currently believed they owned the 17th century palace or not isn't the point.

What is the point, is that the room I was in had a walk in closet and a bookshelf the length and height of an entire wall. A window split the bookshelf in the middle of that wall, a gracious window seat attached to it. Directly across the room was a vanity table and chair that could've come from a Victorian IKEA.

While the room was lovely, one look at the bed reminded me of my situation. I mean, I wasn't stupid. Clearly there was something about me that had to do with their 'beloved Alec'. But did it have to be so important to kidnap me? To kill me?

The anger began bubbling up in me. The unfairness of the situation washing over me like a flood. 'Become acquainted before my life begins'. My life — as if I weren't currently living. As if what I had now was the existence of a maggot or of a caterpillar. They clearly wanted me to turn me into a vampire. No, not wanted. They were going to turn me. To make me like them. Forever. Whether I liked it or not. I felt like I was going to explode.

I screamed. A roar that clawed its way from the pit of my stomach and ground into my vocal chords as it was released into the air.

I stood, racing over to the bed and ripping the pillows off of it, followed by the comforter, the sheets and eventually shifting my weight to push the mattress off to the side. The pretty vase of flowers on the bedside table were thrown across the room, water and petals showering the floor as it soared through the air. The table was pushed on its' side and without stopping, I made my way to the rest of the objects in the room. Each item appearing as old as the world itself and each spared no mercy in my rampage.

Until I faced the bookshelf. Out of all the books residing on the shelves, the binding of the book inches from my face caught my attention. My face scrunched up in remorseful distaste. Slowly, my breathing returned to normal as I simply stared at it.

Once I'd calmed down, my wits returned to me and I looked around the room with guilt. I ran my hands down my arms and glanced in a mirror I hadn't shattered, checking myself over for any damage. A practice I had to do religiously in my world, as I wouldn't be able to tell if I'd been hurt without physically seeing the wound. I noticed nothing obvious and no blood.

I shivered, trying not to imagine what could have happened if I had accidentally cut myself on something. Because, well, you know...bloodthirsty vampires and all. I'd have to be even more diligent in my awareness of such things now. What had always been a general life or death possibility, became an almost guarantee for the latter.

I collapsed to the floor and moments later, the door creaked open. Two male vampires stood in the doorway, their physicality almost exact opposites. They moved inside the room cautiously, as if they had been listening in to my little tirade.

The first was quite brutish, large in size and gruff in nature, yet he was hunched over as if trying to make himself appear less intimidating. This was aided by the childish smirk that rested on his face. If it weren't for the grace of his vampiric attributes, he would have resembled Lenny from Of Mice and Men. He snickered, "you sure she's not already a newborn?" I quickly tossed the previous comparison from my mind, his tone and mannerisms far more sophisticated than he originally presented. And yet, he seemed to favour humour in such a situation.

"She's an angry little human." His friend seemed to hold the charm between the two of them, and while he was shorter than his friend he was taller than me. "Exactly what Alec deserves." It didn't sound spiteful, as the two seemed to find amusement in their own words. The comedic timing of this duo, however, did not translate to me. In fact, the meaning behind their words only confused me further. Yet, they didn't seem to mind my lack of appreciation for their routine.

The big one took a step towards me and I shifted backwards onto my bum, scrambling awkwardly in a backwards crab walk until I hit the bookshelf in the corner. He ceased in his approach and exchanged looks with the other one.

"We're not going to hurt you." Despite my fear, I rolled my eyes in sarcastic cynicism at the claim.

The short one took over, pushing the big one behind him. "My name is Demetri. The meathead is Felix. He looks big and scary and...well he can be — but he won't hurt you. Unless he has to, that is."

Felix whined behind him, "you're making it worse."

"Please leave." Their eyes widened at my words, and I felt a brief flash of regret at my harshness. Demetri sighed, giving me a sad look, and led Felix out of the room.

"That was your fault. She was gonna be my new best friend..." Their words cut off with the door and I shivered at the blasé nature of their conversation.

I stood and began to put the room back together as best I could. I walked to the side of the mattress that rested against the floor and attempted to lift it back onto the bed. A simple yet slightly taxing feat when comparing its size against mine. I groaned, dropping it only half way on the bed, grateful that most of its weight was balanced on the bed instead of the floor.

It was then that the tears began to flow freely.

I had to get out of here.


	4. Diversion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Demetri and Felix give Saffiya a tour.

**T** hese people were delusional if they thought I would just let them keep me here. I just needed to figure out how I was going to make my escape.

As if hearing my plea, a timid knock sounded from the other side of my door.

Demetri poked his head in. "I know you told us to go away. But Felix and I thought it would be way more fun if we didn't" I bit my lip carefully, watching the man, his friend standing sheepishly behind him. "Look, we know you're probably really scared right now, but the way I see it - you're stuck here. Might as well make the most of it."

Felix, likely too eager to stand aside anymore, pushed the door open to join the conversation. The longer they stood there, the more I relaxed. They weren't exactly attacking or threatening me.

"So, you in?"

"A tour. I'd like a tour." They both looked at me. "Please."

Felix's face lit up and he grabbed my hand. I winced at the sudden contact and he released me, checking his excitement. It seemed an odd personality trait for such a large man, but it was somehow endearing. "Let's go!"

"Err...do you think you could help me put the bed back. Apparently lifting it back up is more difficult than pushing it off." Felix let out a booming laugh and the two started walking down the hall. I jogged to catch up with them before falling into step.

"Don't worry about it. Heidi's probably already redecorating."

"But it's my mess, I wouldn't want—"

Felix held out a hand. "Trust me kid, you'd only get in the way." I gave him a puzzled look.

"Super strength, 'member?" Demetri chimed in with a grin.

"Right."

They led me through the halls, pointing out their rooms which were a floor below mine. They couldn't tell me much about the paintings on the wall, but I recognised a few and made them stop occasionally. One of them however, caught my full attention.

"Is this...it can't be." Demetri and Felix flanked my sides to look over my shoulder at the painting I had pointed out. "This is En Canot. This is supposed to have been destroyed by the Nazi's."

Demetri seemed to laugh it off, "is that the story they came up with?"

"It's a forgery, right?" I wished at the moment I had my father's eye for art. He'd posed as a forgery expert so many times but I'd never paid much attention past the types of paint and how to mix them so that it could be used to fool even the best of experts.

Felix shook his head. "Nuh-uh — real deal."

"That's impossible..." I trailed off, staring at the painting. I was never one for Metzinger, but I couldn't help but be in awe of the rare opportunity that I was being presented with. "This is over 2 million dollars."

Demetri eyed me. "you really know your art for a kid in the 21st century."

"Between education with the nuns and my father's work with forgeries, it was hard not to." I paused as we continued, wondering if I should admit the rest of my background or not. "And I may have forged a Degas or two."

"So you're like, a criminal."

"I was a kid. I barely knew what I was doing." 'Monkey see, monkey do', my father would say when he had a heist that required such a skillset. Now that I'm older I see the impossibility in such a talent. It was highly unlikely and easily discredited. Which is exactly why we pulled it off. Most of the time. "I was just a good copycat."

A few floors down, another painting made me pause and I hesitated to stop at it. Two people were standing side by side in a portrait style. Though it was more elegant and flattering than most old portraits you'd see of kings and queens.

Demetri seemed unsure of himself, "that's Jane and Alec, the twins."

"They look..." I tilted my head, trying to find the right word. "Unhappy."

"That's one word for it."

"Sadistic is another."

I frowned, tearing my gaze away from Alec's eyes as even through a painting, they seemed to bore into mine. "What are you talking about?"

"Come on, don't tell me you haven't noticed it?"

I shook my head, "what?"

"Felix, slow down." Demetri shoved Felix aside, deciding he was the best to give me a little history lesson. "Some vampires have...gifts in addition to the rest of the vamp stuff. Remember how Aro touched your hand?"

"Yes."

Felix cut in again, "he can read every thought you've ever had with just a touch. Demetri can track stuff—"

"It's a little more complicated than that," Demetri mumbled.

"What does this have to do with Jane and Alec?" The two men exchanged glances, as if unsure if they should tell me or not.

I raised my eyebrows expectantly and Demetri continued, "the twins have opposite gifts. Jane can cause pain, unimaginable extreme pain with just one look. It's like being burned alive." The pin pricks...was that what it was? Had she been able to make me feel pain? It wasn't possible. Supernatural element aside, nothing in the world was able to make that happen. Pain didn't exist for me. And yet...

"And well, you experienced Alec's gift." I shivered, remembering the emptiness of the world that must have been the effects of Alec's power. "Yeah," they nodded at my response to the memory. "That's the general consensus."

"It's why they are the most respected and highest level of the guard."

"Level?"

"Some of us are more valuable than others. An easy way to tell is the darker the cloak, the higher up." I recognised the dark grey of their cloaks, lighter than Alec and Jane's but by less than a shade.

I frowned in response to his comment, "your worth is placed on whether you're telekinetic or not? That seems impractical." They didn't bother to correct the random superpower I threw out, which made me think such a thing might actually be possible. "Wait...what are you guarding?"

"Aro, Marcus, Caius. The Volturi and all that it stands for."

Scoffing disrespectfully, I demanded, "exactly what do you stand for?"

"We maintain order within the vampire world. Those that threaten our existence or lack control threaten that order." He checked to see if I was still listening, "our main purpose is to — "

I cut in, "maintain secrecy." The overflow of information was swimming around in my head, little bits and pieces beginning to make sense. Though the whole thing only seemed to present me with more questions.

"Correct."

"So, you're basically the vampire mafia."

Felix shrugged, "I'd say we're more like royalty but close enough."

"Long live the Monarchy." I whispered in a plummy tone, looking back up at the painting of the twins.

We continued on through the halls, the men pointing out various rooms until we finally reached the destination I'd been waiting for. "These are the kitchens, where you will have most of your meals."

"You don't eat?" Demetri flashed me another grin. How could I forget. "Right, stupid question."

"And across from the kitchens, this is one way to get to the throne room." We walked down a flight of stairs, across from which was a woman sitting at a receptionist desk. The men ignored her as she stood in respectful greeting. I turned my head and tugged on Felix's arm.

"What's that way?"

"Oh, that leads to the town center." He dismissed the words even as he spoke them, "big clock tower, fountain, nothing special."

We skipped the throne room and turned down another dark corridor. "This way to the dungeons!"

I had grown to appreciate the two men's company. They spoke with a more modern tongue than Aro or Alec had, though I doubted they were younger than the last hundred years. Their banter and wit was as human as could be. An unexpected behaviour if I'd based all my knowledge on only my first interaction with them.

"Demetri, I'm cold. May I borrow your cloak?" Without a second thought, Demetri handed it over. And as much as I appreciated their hospitality, my objective for this tour had been achieved. I knew my way out.

Therefore, as we made our way down the steep steps to the dungeon, I decided this was as good a chance as any to end the tour. With both the men in front of me, I did my best to fake a fall and they froze as they turned in time to see me land on the stone steps. I moved my hand to grip my ankle and for a second I thought that they wouldn't believe my performance.

"You're pretty clumsy for a human, aren't you?" Felix chimed with a giggle. I merely shrugged as his arms slipped behind my back and under my legs, easily lifting me and speeding off to my room.

He set me down in front of the double doors, where a man with a buzzcut and short eyebrows stood waiting for us. "Tour was almost over anyways. Demetri and I have guard duty, but this is Prosper. He'll be your guard for the night."

"Keeping me in or others out?"

Felix grinned to Prosper. "She doesn't miss a beat, this one."

I nodded my head to Prosper, "pleasure." I said to him. He shifted his head down once before looking forward again.

Felix muttered to me, "he doesn't say much."

"Perhaps he's afraid of you." It was an actual suggestion, but there was a teasing tone to my words. I had certainly become more comfortable with him.

Felix didn't answer me though, instead lightly shuffling me into my room. "Off you go then."

Was it my room? The bed, the glass from the vase and every little detail that I had spent time destroying was back in its place. Right down to the three flowers beside the bed. The place was immaculate. It seemed no one had redecorated because the only difference was my bag on the corner of the bedpost. I'd completely forgotten about it.

The door closed behind me and I assumed that was my goodbye for the night. Which meant it was time for operation get the heck out of here.

Demetri had forgotten to take his cloak back from me, as was my intention. I opened my backpack and walked into the bathroom, scavenging through my bag. I turned on the faucet just in case Prosper was listening to me. His presence outside my door was a bit of a snag in my plans, but it was easily amended.

Shifting my backpack onto my shoulder, I opened the door and Prosper turned to me. "Prosper, I'm sorry to bother you, but could I get a cup of tea?"

"I am not to leave my post, miss."

"Please? It's just that I can't sleep." I relaxed my face into a distressed, mopey sort of expression. He hesitated slightly, his eyes softening with pity before agreeing and walking down the hall.

Once he'd disappeared from the corridor, I quickly slipped the cloak back over my body to cover my backpack and headed in the opposite direction.

Right, left, left... "shoot." I froze at the top of a staircase. Had I missed a turn? I was running out of time. No doubt with vampire speed, Prosper had already noticed my absence and had gone to tell Aro. I knew they might find me, but I hoped to achieve my mission before then. Without the time to waste, I headed down the stairs.

Wrong decision. I came face to face with two members of the guard I hadn't met yet. Their cloaks were light grey — so lower on the chain than Demetri and Felix.

"Oh...hey..."

"Are you lost, human?"

"Actually, I was heading to the kitchens. For tea." I could tell they didn't believe me.

One of them gruffly offered, "we'll escort you."

While I'm sure it was more of a statement than an offer, I pretended it was. "That's fine, actually. Felix and Demetri gave me a tour and said it was alright if I ever wanted to just get some." They still didn't look fully convinced, but were unsure whether to challenge what actually could have been Felix and Demetri's instructions. "Plus, it is helping me...become acquainted with the castle." I used Aro's words and their eyes flinched with recognition of the phrase and they stepped aside, allowing me to pass.

"Down the hall and to your left."

I gave them a smile with fake cheer, "thank you."

When I was no longer in their sight, I turned right. Up another flight of stairs and I saw the receptionist's desk. She was sitting with her back to me, typing. I quickly threw Demetri's hood up over my head and walked as quietly as I could towards the entrance.

I breathed in and out, attempting to slow the pace of my heart. I refused to get caught because of some petty physiological reaction.

I turned in the hallway and spotted two doors. Praying that these were the right ones, I pushed them open. I was greeted with the night sky. Unlike earlier, it was a dark blue and more stars than I had ever seen twinkled on its canvas. This was late enough to be considered' tonight.' Now, all I had to do was find that pub.

I couldn't help the nerves that rattled my stomach as I took my first step onto the cobblestone street. I should have just run away. Escaped the city and looked for clues elsewhere. But I'd already looked everywhere I could think. If I was going to find my father — that pub was my only chance. If only I could remember what it was called.

I headed down the slanted street, picking the path that seemed to lead most directly towards the road that led into the city. After several winding turns and hills so steep that the people living in those houses must have been lopsided, I found the familiar flag. The bench only steps away from the entrance confirmed it. It was easier than I expected. Easier than it should have been, really. Not that it mattered because I had found it.

With a sigh of relief, I swung the door open.

The bartender noticed me, but paid me no mind as she went back to her customers. The place was much busier than it had been in the afternoon. Italian words hummed through the air, along with boisterous laughter and clinking of glasses. I had believed the Italian to be slightly more refined than this before I heard the distinct strident tones of German and English cut into the romance language.

I'd barely become fully acclimated to my surroundings before a honeyed voice tickled my ear. "Silly girl...I will always find you."


	5. Monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Saffiya finds her father's friend.

" **D** id you truly believe we would not follow you?"

My blood ran cold and I whipped around to face the speaker. The face was familiar, but now held bright red eyes hidden behind a pair of shaded sunglasses. Who wears sunglasses at night?

It struck me then that I was now privy to an element of the world that was incredibly sacred. So secret that it had been able to exist for centuries through only folklore and myths. They had been demonized, becoming synonymous with the word monster. Were they monsters? What exactly constituted a monster? Despite my doubts, I could feel my blood pounding in my ear at the arrival of my captor.

He lacked a cloak, but was still garbed in the old fashioned, formal wear of the guard. A golden V necklace hung from his neck, visible under the top two undone buttons of his tunic. The oversight on his part seemed out of character, as if he'd been in the middle of undoing them when something distracted him.

"I wanted a head start." Alec raised an eyebrow. "I've some loose ends that need tying."

He rolled his eyes and took hold of my arm, beginning to pull me to the exit.

I dug my heels in and pulled against him, "wait, wait, wait—" He must've seen the look he got from the bartender because he stopped, not wanting to draw the attention. He reluctantly let me turn him around to face me and I couldn't believe I was even touching him by choice. "Jane is all you have left, right? She's the most important person in the world?" He didn't answer me, but a flicker in his eyes was strong enough for me to catch through the glasses.

"This is for my father. So, just…"

The door to the pub blew open with a gust of wind. A short, round man hobbled in, his left hand clutching a rather shiny cane. He sat at the bar and rested the cane on his lap, raising his right hand to get the bartender's attention. My eyes narrowed — got him. I started towards him, but a tug of my arm kept me back.

Alec was watching the man with a fierce look in his eyes. I took a step towards Alec — closer than I ever wanted to get to him again. This movement made his head snap back to me. He seemed to be studying me, scanning my face through his dark glasses. His gaze dropped to my lips before meeting my green eyes. "Alec...please." There was something in the way I said his name that seemed to spark an illusion in us both.

After a moment, he let my arm go.

I wasted no time in case Alec changed his mind. I lightly pulled the picture off the wall and approached the older man. I sat beside him at the bar, facing him straight on. He gave me an odd look as the bartender placed a glass of whiskey in front of him. The choice in drink contrasted with his focus on the football game on the tv above the bar.

I had planned to behave more smoothly. To sit beside him casually, order the same drink as him and start a conversation before I bombarded him with an interrogation. Only I was clearly short on time, so I went with a more aggressive approach.

I set the picture down in front of him.

"What do you want, kid?"

"Do you know where this man is?"

He ignored the picture, taking a sip from his glass. He barely acknowledged my presence, instead throwing a look over his shoulder at Alec. The vampire stood against the wall, eyeing us.

"Who's that, your bodyguard?" I gave him a taste of his own medicine and ignored the question.

I swapped the picture out with the whiskey, picking it up and placing it out of his reach unless he wanted to get closer to me. Which he clearly was not going to attempt, especially with Alec's presence.

I tapped my father's face. "This man." He sighed irritably and reached into his inside jacket pocket, placing a pair of reading glasses on the bridge of his nose. He glanced at the picture for maybe three seconds before turning his head back up to the match.

"Sorry, sweetheart. That was a long time ago and I didn't know half the folks I'm with in these pictures."

I frowned suspiciously, "you seem pretty chummy to be strangers here."

"Look kid, I don't know him." He turned away from the game and glared at me. His back straightened and his mood shifted to provide a more frightening appearance. He was like a different person and I flinched under his scrutiny. "Now, do you mind buzzing off? I got money on this match."

Sighing, I apologised, "sorry for wasting your time." I slowly got up and retreated back towards Alec, who was still watching the man with intensity. "You were right, then. Waste of time, I'll take my punishment willingly."

"He's lying."

Was he helping me? "What?"

"He lied to you."

"Yes, well, I can't exactly force him to tell me the truth." I looked back over to the man, whose focus had returned to the game. His fist balled up as a goal was scored and he tossed back the rest of his drink, waving his hand for another. Money...he was betting. If he was the right man, and I was positive he was, this didn't make sense. Con artists didn't take a gamble unless they're sure they'll win. It was what made them so arrogant.

"I'm such an idiot." Alec growled lowly and I looked up at him confused before continuing my thought process.

What's a con man's incentive? Money. And clearly, he was running low. If the job he had been planning with my father had gone through, he'd probably be in Monaco right now. But he wasn't. He was here.

Before Alec could stop me, I returned to my seat beside the man. At my appearance, he groaned and shouted to the bartender. "Make it a double!"

He opened his mouth, probably to tell me to get lost again but I cut him off, "when my father proposed to my mother, he didn't have a cent. He believed she deserved the world and he wanted to give it to her. So, he went into this private high stakes poker club one night to try and win some money so he could buy her a ring."

He picked up the glass, basically tearing it from the bartender's hands and mumbled into the drink, "get lost, kid."

"They took one look at him and called him a sucker. The man running the game was some retired mobster and he let my father play, if only to humiliate him." The man rolled his eyes, still starring at the football match. "However, his big ego — lost him his great great grandmother's engagement ring. She had received the ring from the bastard son of a woman named Sophia Matilda."

He fixed me with another pissed off stare. "This little fairytale have a point?"

"Sophia was given the ring by her father." I undid the clasp around my neck, letting the ring slip off its chain and onto the bar. It spun around itself before landing on its side. A large emerald rock stood out from the gold of the ring. "King George III."

He stared at me for a moment before throwing his head back with an exaggerated guffaw. "Bullshit. Nice try, Princess."

"Have a look, then." His eyes narrowed. If I was right about his current financial status, as a con man and an acquaintance of my father, he had to be miserable. Between scores, a con was either living a lustrous life or living off scraps in the gutter before they found their next opportunity. Their nature didn't typically allow them to engage in activities of the poor for long and this guy had definitely spent too long in his current low status.

There was no way he wasn't at least tempted by my story. Confidence men loved a story.

"Even if I'm lying, if you're any kind of...professional...you'll recognize that the ring is indeed even older than this story. It'll fetch a pretty penny no matter what you tell the buyer."

He squinted at me and picked up the ring, handling it delicately in his fingers. He reached into his pocket to pull out a different pair of thick glasses, watching me out of the corner of his eye as he put them on.

He sneered at me, "what do you want to know?"

"Everything you can tell me about Thomas Civello."

"What's it to you?"

"He's my father." This surprised him and he quickly examined the ring once more. Yet, he said nothing. I shifted impatiently, "he's been missing for five years. His last letter told me he was meeting you — here — for a final score."

"Yeah. He never showed up." My face dropped as shoved the ring loosely into his pant pocket. He continued spitefully, "it fell through without him and I ended up here."

"What was the job?" He glanced back over to Alec and it looked like he spotted the V around his neck because he whipped his head back to me.

He grumbled, "do'n't matter." He made eye contact with the bartender and ever so slightly tilted his head towards Alec. I watched in confusion as she immediately moved from behind the bar and over to the vampire, making conversation.

As soon as she blocked us from his view, the man grabbed my knee. The sudden move surprising me as he whispered hurriedly, "Friday, 2 AM. Meet me at the bottom of the city."

Before I could question him, he turned his attention back to the football match and the waitress returned. It didn't look like she made much headway with Alec, as the boy was frowning in silence.

As if to spite Alec in a moment of courage, the man directed, "careful kid, boys like him never have good intentions." I tilted my head, unsure of what to make from his warning.

Alec stalked over to us and glowered down at the man, directing his words to me. "It's time to go." I obediently stood, placing my bag back over my shoulder.

I placed a hand on the man's arm, "thank you." He grumbled once more before Alec guided me out the door.

Outside, the rain had returned and I lifted my hood up. My lips began to tilt up with a giddy expression. It wasn't the information I was hoping for, but I had gotten further in my father's case in the last two days than in the last five years. Misha would be proud of me. If only I could tell her. I was taken from my reverie as Alec spoke, lifting the corner of the cloak with distaste, "whose is this?"

I bit my lip and glanced down, only feeling slightly guilty. "I may have tricked Demetri into giving it to me." His face held no reaction, but he returned his hand to my lower back.

He guided me silently through the streets of Volterra and I wondered why we weren't using his speed. He always seemed to be in such a hurry to be rid of me. This empty air between us however, wasn't dark and foreboding as it had been when he threatened my life. It seemed easier to be in his presence and I didn't shy away from his touch. What was the matter with me? I should be running, hiding, going anywhere that he wasn't. That is, if he wouldn't catch me. Which he would.

The castle entrance came into sight and Alec's voice cut through the air once more. "Was it true? Your story about the ring."

I reached into my pocket, eyeing the ring and placing it on my finger. "You tell me." I winked at him and he stopped in his tracks. All hostility between us momentarily forgotten and he almost seemed impressed. He pushed the doors open and allowed me to pass through. Were those doors ever locked? Although, I suppose burglars were the least of the Volturi's worries.

Our arrival triggered the receptionist to stand, looking ashamed and I realised that my escape could've gotten both her and Prosper in trouble. I joined her shame, not believing how inconsiderate my desperate curiosity had made me.

Her presence and the reminder of his role within the castle walls seemed to remind Alec that he hated me, because he pushed me past her and hissed in my ear, "if you try to escape again, your father won't be the only one missing." I glared up at him, fear for my father's friend and the reality of my situation returning to me tenfold.

Whatever bonding progress Alec and I made in the last two hours was apparently moot. So much for that.

Alec led me to a separate section of the castle, to a chamber that I recognised to be what Felix and Demetri had declared: 'the casual throne room' - as opposed to the formal one I'd previously experienced. It wasn't much different. Less marble, a little darker and probably more of what you'd expect from an ancient vampire cult.

The extravagant doors opened in as we approached. Aro, Marcus, and Caius were standing around a table, examining old scrolls and documents. Aro clapped his hands together, delighted by our arrival. He left the other two at the table and gracefully floated towards us.

Less guards than before scattered around the room, Demetri and Felix included. I recognised the two I'd passed in the hallways, but Prosper was nowhere to be found. Jane stood in the corner and once he'd placed me in the middle of the room, Alec went to join her. Dick.

"Not even a day and you've already caused quite a stir around here, dear one." He raised his hand to me. "Now, how did you come up with such a plan?" I gave him my hand, not even bothering to feign reluctance. Especially now that I knew what he was doing.

He'd see my escape plan unfold. From conception to tricking Felix and Demetri into not only showing me the way out but also my pitiful audition for a life alert button ("help I've fallen and I can't get up"). As well as my escape past poor Prosper and the receptionist before I finally stepped out of his beloved palace.

Which never would've happened if his guard knew I was bullshitting them all.

"Yes, perhaps I should have prepared the guard for the intricacies of your condition." There goes my secret weapon. He released my hand and sidestepped me to face the general room.

"Saffiya has a condition known as congenital insensitivity to pain. It is quite rare and quite dangerous on a day to day basis..." His brothers looked bored and I made the assumption that Aro had already informed them of this. The guards, however, looked no more clued in than before, because despite understanding the words and perhaps even the condition, they weren't sure how it applied to my jail break. For the first time, Aro looked hesitant and I realized that despite being inside my head, he wasn't sure how to better explain.

Aro had already spilled the beans so, though I was loathe to give up my trade secrets, I aided his explanation. "When I tricked Felix and Demetri into thinking I'd hurt my ankle," I started my story here, assuming everyone but Alec was already been filled in to their sides of the story. "In actuality, even if I did twist my ankle or something, I wouldn't know right away. I'd probably have walked on it the rest of the night before noticing something might be wrong."

An idea seemed to occur to Aro as I said this. "For example," Aro began, moving his hand to the right sleeve of my shirt. "May I, dear one?" The request sounded odd, as he'd never asked for my permission before doing anything before.

"Err...I suppose."

Once receiving confirmation from me, Aro lifted the right sleeve of my shirt to reveal a black and purple bruise forming. Different areas of pressure and shape indicated the possibility of the culprit being a hand. It certainly wasn't the worst bruise I'd ever had, but it definitely looked it.

"Oh wow!" I unconsciously laughed if off, raising my arm to get a better look. "Didn't catch that one." I absent-mindedly checked the other arm, remembering all the physical shifting I'd done throughout the day. In fact, I should've checked myself over right after getting chased down by those guys. And being tossed around by Alec. There was sure to be a few minor marks but it was unlikely they'd need any kind of attention.

I hadn't noticed that Aro still had skin to skin contact with me, and my current thoughts must have also flashed through his mind because he addressed the room once more. "Additionally, it seems we must be more careful with dear Saffiya than with a normal human." He had a point. "As she will be unable to tell us if we have perhaps, been a bit too harsh in our handling of her." He aimed his comment to Alec, who was still staring at the bruise around my bicep.

His sister shot him a glare, a sibling level of annoyance brewing in her expression. Probably because he'd ruined their golden child image.

"My boy, you, of anyone, should be most gentle with her."

"Yes, master." I highly doubted he'd see the order through.

However, Aro seemed satisfied with Alec's response, "from now on, I think it best to keep a specific rotation of guards around you. For your own safety and to prevent any further attempts to flee." There was a glint in his eye and I wasn't sure if it was malicious or light-hearted before he leaned in to me. "Of which you must promise never to do so again."

Fat chance. "Yes, sir."

I was given a wave, dismissing me from their presence and Alec returned to my side. As we began to leave, Aro spoke up, a lyrical lift in his voice as he added, "gentle, Alec." Alec nodded, actually refusing to touch me at all as he once again led me out of the room.


	6. Marcus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Saffiya bonds with members of the guard and Marcus offers a word of advice.

" **H** ey, Afton!" The serious vampire stopped, staring at me as if I had two heads. He might not enjoy my next question..."Did you know the earth is round?"

He looked back and forth at the two men behind me, before an arid expression overcame his face. "What kind of inane question is that?"

"Nevermind." I tossed back over my shoulder, crossing out a date and walking back towards Felix and Demetri. "So, either he was born after the 5th century or he believes in recent science." I rubbed a finger on my chin in mock contemplation. Only some 1,000 years of possibilities — no big deal.

"What are you three doing?" I looked up slowly to meet Heidi's eyes, marked with the elegance of a French wine. She came to a stop in front of us, hand on her hip and garbed in her usual skin exposing outfit. Though this one held a bit more modesty.

Heidi had been my guard for most of yesterday, surprising me with an immediate trip to her room where we chalked her bedroom walls. She talked a lot, but I didn't mind because she didn't tip toe around subjects. When she turned on surprisingly modern music, she began talking about how she discovered the band on one of her fishing expeditions.

Yeah. That's how I found out. The grand plan took the whole 'being bored to death on a museum tour' to a brand new level. Go figure.

I hadn't seen Alec since that first night.

He'd left me off at my room without a word. Refusing to touch me, even when I'd almost tripped up the stairs. One part of me was grateful, because the last thing I wanted was to be any closer to him. The other part of me spent the rest of the night trying to ignore the way he'd looked at me in the pub as I said his name.

I'd be lying if I said Alec hadn't crossed my mind at all over the last three days. I'd also be lying if I said it had only happened once. The ridiculousness of it all made my disdain for him grow all the more.

The only thing able to occupy my mind when I wasn't being distracted by someone else, was the increased curiosity about my father. There were so many possible things that his friend might have to show me. I had only two days before I was supposed to meet him again. Two days too many. The extra time was precious, but dangerous as I found myself lost in idealised scenarios which led me straight to my father — no more unnecessary risks with vampires. I knew it was all a dream, and while I tried to keep my thoughts realistic, I couldn't help but cross my fingers and wish on a star every night. I needed all the luck I could get.

The more time I spent with Felix and Demetri, the more I forgot that I should be truly terrified by my situation. I had, after all, been kidnapped by vampires and was being forced to become one. Along with the added element that I was to stay human — for a reason that had yet to be sensibly explained to me — in a castle full of vampires who had to try not to eat me for a few weeks. All for the purpose of 'bonding' with my new playmates.

Perhaps the situation was so absurd that I'd processed it and moved on. Or perhaps my rock solid faith in a non-existent escape plan — that had to factor in 'running from vampires', was enough to keep me going. Or maybe it was because every time I tried to remind myself exactly what I was supposed to be afraid of, alI could see was Alec.

_He leaned closer to me and his eyes locked with mine. I felt as if we'd returned to that alley, because I couldn't move and I think I forgot how to breathe. Yet, none of that mattered and for a moment, I thought he was lost in the same trance that I was. That is, until he spoke. His voice as slow and dark as I imagined his soul to be._

_"Do you feel your heartbeat, human?"_

Even the memory of the blood on his lips mere seconds after he'd killed someone in front of me wasn't enough to get my heart racing. At least not in the way it needed to be.

Evidently, he had been shifting his guard duties off on the others. After Aro had admonished him in front of the entire guard the other day, he had been pawning his shifts guarding me off on the others. Whether he was embarrassed (Heidi's theory), guilty for bruising me (Demetri's dumb theory), or was just plain sick of me (Felix's theory), I was grateful because I didn't want to see his ugly mug either.

So maybe I wanted to see him a little bit. If only to give him a piece of my mind. Because for some ill-contrived reason, he decided that I was the burden in this arrangement. If anything, I should be the one with a grudge. After all, even Aro had admitted that without Alec, I wouldn't be in this mess.

His sister, Jane, had stopped by my room two or three times for a game of chess or to put a puzzle together but we didn't talk much. It was actually kind of nice.

Felix and Demetri were absolutely bewildered when I first told them. Nor did they stop bringing it up any chance they could to try and reiterate how ruthless and unstable she actually was.

"Alec is the "nice" twin."

 _Do you feel your heartbeat, human?_ "He threatened to kill me."

"Exactly." Apparently, they had predicted that Jane would declare me public enemy number one, though they refused to tell me why.

Felix's deep voice interrupted my memory as he gleefully filled Heidi in on the assignment he'd given me on behalf of Aro. "We're making Saffiya guess when everyone was born!" Heidi raised her eyebrows.

I added in the educational component, "I believe Aro thinks it'll help me learn everyone's names."

Heidi took a look over my shoulder, doubt clouding her face. "Felix...none of her answers are right."

I gasped dramatically and pulled it away from her, "it's a work in progress!" I defended myself as the two men snickered. "They're not even giving me any clues or anything!"

"How come Elizabeth's name is crossed out?"

Childishly, Demetri pointed a finger at me, "cause she cheated!"

"I did not!" I argued back with indignation, "I just asked her and she gave me an answer."

Felix scoffed to discredit me, "you can't just ask for the answer! You're supposed to figure it out with little details and the kinds of words that they use."

"That's impossible!"

"Is not!"

"Yesterday, Demetri used the word, 'yeet'!"

Brushing off my extremely valid example, Felix rolled his eyes mockingly. "Demetri doesn't count."

Demetri, having been distracted by Heidi's...dress, resentfully leaned away from our debate, "I'm right here."

"You know what, you're being mean so I'm going to be the big kid and walk away." I gathered my materials and carried them through the nearest doorway, leaving behind the sound of two groan men giggling. With another turn, I entered a side door leading to the room where I'd had my second audience with the masters. A few days ago, the masters had been convened around the giant desk, standing and appearing rather busy. But today, only Marcus was resting on a chair, his attention focused in a blasé manner on a piece of parchment in his chalky hands.

I stomped in, notebook and pencil in my arms and collapsed on the top stair of the outside ring of the room. I'd entered too quickly to acknowledge the fact that I might be disturbing Marcus and the thought didn't occur to me until my bum hit the ground. I bit my lip, deciding to be extra quiet because it'd be rude if I just left after such a melodramatic entrance.

"Saffiya." My name seemed to ring from his mouth. God, vampires could say anything. They would be fantastic voice actors. I raised my head and tilted it to the side in curiosity. I'd hardly heard Marcus say anything without prompt. His ghost like hand raised itself from the parchment and gave me two waves, encouraging me to approach him.

I pulled my things back against my chest and did so, sitting when he pulled out the chair on the corner for me. "How is your day, child?"

I sighed, "I'm fine, Marcus. And yourself?" He gave me a gentle nod before placing a finger on my assignment.

"And what is this?" My response came slowly, as I was still in shock at the fact that I was having a real conversation with the stone man.

"I am trying to deduce the original year of every member of the guard." I said this proudly. Glancing back down at the paper, the numbers and boxes for my answers suddenly seemed too messy and incoherent. Sitting with Marcus, instead of in-between two bored and unruly vampires, brought me down from the high energy haze I had been in. Marcus' calmer presence seemed to lend me a boost of intellect and my shoulders quickly deflated, "Felix said Aro wanted me to complete it, but I'm beginning to think he was lying."

Marcus raised his head and I was suddenly too nervous to look at him. Had it been so obvious of a lie that I'd made a fool of myself in not calling it out sooner? I shifted uncomfortably under his gaze, waiting for him to chide me for a foolish mistake. Though he hardly seemed the type, the refined manner he embodied was so strong of a reminder of the Mother Superior that I think I'd been projecting. Marcus, however, gave me the opposite of criticism. "Will you continue?" Pausing, I considered his question, additionally coming up with my own; Why learn if I wasn't planning on staying around?

"Well, Demetri and Felix said there were levels of the guards. And even if I don't seem them all that much, they're still important to the Volturi and it would be rude if I didn't give them the same respect."

Marcus nodded in thought, "You have a good heart, Saffiya."

"While it beats." I looked back up at him, worried he'd take offence to my statement.

He didn't, instead offering, "a word of caution, child. Not every vampire is fond of their birth." Then, he looked at me, as if to convey a full round of information through a nonexistent telepathic connection.

I bit my lip, glancing down at the two names on the bottom of the list. "You mean Alec and Jane, don't you?"

"In time, dear one." As slowly as a gargoyle, he returned his attention to the piece of parchment, once again as still as a statue. If I didn't know any better, I'd believe he was one.

I took this as my cue to leave. I'd nearly made it to the archway of the door when I heard my name.

"Saffiya." I jumped, startled that he'd dropped his composure again, but when I looked back he hadn't moved. "Perhaps the library will provide you with more appropriate answers than Felix and Demetri. Elizabeth appears to have given you an incorrect year."

I returned to the foyer to see that my apparent guards had disappeared. I frowned, wishing I had had this chance only days ago when I'd needed a lapse in my 24/7 watch to escape through the corridors and out into the streets. But there was no point yet. I still had two days before I was supposed to meet my father's friend — whose name I had failed to catch. Therefore, I no longer had any reasonable destination, and surely not one that would keep me hidden from my captors for long enough.

Glancing down at the assignment in my hands, I decided that I wouldn't mind spending time in the library. There had to be a few books that would tell me about the typical lingo during the different time periods for this fake assignment. Or perhaps I'd just pick a random book and enjoy the quiet. After all, I'd hardly had a moment alone since I arrived.

It was only after I'd turning the corner on the long corridor that led to the library that a buzzing sound caught my ears. As I got further and further down the corridor, I began to pick up noises that could have formed words...only it seemed the conversation was on fast forward and I could barely understand anything being said. Good to know that vampire speed applies to more than just physical activity, I suppose.

"...won't leave...guilty..."

"she..."

Garbled nonsense, I determined, ready to keep on as normal until I heard Felix's voice loud and clear,

"...what he did to Prosper..." I froze, an overwhelming wave of guilt crashing in my stomach. I hadn't seen Prosper since I'd sent him on an errand under false pretences in order to escape my room. I had come to assume that perhaps it was only by chance that we hadn't run into each other. After all, my current rotation of guards, sans Alec, kept me relatively busy or sequestered in my room.

Felix had included Prosper's name on my list of the guards and I had hoped that meant he hadn't gotten in trouble for letting me escape. Now, it sounded as if he had. What had Aro done to him?

As I got closer, I was sure to hold my breath and each step I took was cautious and painstakingly slow. I was almost at the end of the hall by the time I could hear some of their words more clearly.

"...don't...even Jane...capable of that." I thought vampires were indestructible? Had Aro instructed Jane to use her gift on him, then decided he deserved something worse? What could be worse than burning alive?

Demetri's lilting voice came through, "...Alec was furious..." Alec's gift. Though I was only under it for a few seconds, I had no doubts that it could indeed be considered worse. I may not have felt the full extent of Jane's power, but I had experienced Alec's. I could only imagine what the emptiness would do to someone if it held them captive for an extended amount of time.

Was Alec upset that Aro made him use his gift? He didn't seem to want to use it on even me, so I could only imagine how he'd feel when he had to use it on someone he knew better.

"Saffiya thinks he..." My ears perked up at the mention of my name, but the speed of their conversation still muddled the words.

"...denial..."

"...doubt either of the twins expected to find..."

There was a pause and I worried that perhaps I had been discovered when Heidi timidly proposed a question, "does she even know?"

They had to be talking about me. There were already so many things I was being kept in the dark about around here. One more wouldn't be surprising. Between the Latin phrases and mysterious warnings, I hadn't bothered to learn much about their future plans for me. I wasn't planning on sticking around for them anyways. But this...this sounded different. Important.

"Someone has to tell her." I'd stayed in the shadows long enough and now I was determined to get some answers. I stepped around the corner and they froze, caught red handed, as I revealed myself.

"Tell me what?" I hadn't even realized I'd been holding my breath until I spoke, releasing it all with my demand for information.

Heidi started to step forward, as if to feed me an explanation when Demetri quickly shook his head. So, she stopped and they exchanged nervous expressions among themselves.  
I crossed my arms, eyeing Felix because I expected him to crack first out of the three. "Tell me what?"

Sighing, he shrugged off Demetri's increased attempts at a warning, "Saffiya, listen —"

Suddenly, his eyes rolled back in his head and his back bent with unnatural flexibility. His knees began to fold but he remained upright. I stood, in what should have been horror as I watched his body unfurl. Demetri and Heidi immediately took up their monotone guard faces as they would in the throne room, looking on with apparent disinterest. Though neither of them stared directly at Felix.

I, on the other hand, couldn't stop watching Felix. I'd never seen anyone exhibit such an extensive show of pain and I admit, with a politician's apology, that I was fascinated. His body was contorted, flinching every few seconds from what seemed to be sudden influxes of whatever was attacking him. His head fell backwards, reminding me of a newborn without the strength to hold up its own head. I wondered if his face, which was contracted with stress, would ever be graced by his normal lazy smile again.

In the doorway stood Jane, her lips curled up as she stared Felix down. Though her demeanour demanded fearful obedience, I couldn't help but liken her to a doll. Not one of those creepy ones, despite her eyes which held the truth behind her diet. Her smile was light, cheeks rosy and the resemblance between her and her twin was obvious. And though her gift was feared, the joy and what could have been relief, seemed to cathartically reinvigorate her. In that moment, she was the epitome of innocence. Innocence, that had the ability to bring Felix to his knees with the very pain that had destroyed it. So, this was Jane's gift.

Felix's knees landed on the stone floor as if hit with another surge of power. Groans left his mouth and I couldn't shrug the feeling that he'd experienced whatever this was more than a few times. It was as if he were holding on to the experiential knowledge that it would end.

And it did.

Jane continued smiling, "playtime's over."

I could feel his eyes on me before I even looked in his direction. Alec's eyes narrowed as I dared to meet his gaze. Though he didn't look away, instead his eyes stayed focused on me, forever hostile, consuming and vigilant. His eyes gleamed red, darker then his sister's and perhaps even more than the others. Heidi explained something about this; the darker the red the more recently fed. I only remembered this part because it rhymed, but I'd been too focused on trying to mix her chalk colours to make pink to remember the rest.

Beside her, Alec matched the commanding form of his sister. A natural aura of intimidation gave off less intensity, but a subtle warning rested underneath. If his sister exhibited a discernible balance of pain, surely her twin with such an opposite demeanour was not to be underestimated. He seemed to lack the same externally sadistic lust as his sister, but I had the feeling that by the time the bells went off for his prey, it would be too late.

I tore my eyes away from Alec and was immediately gifted fresh air. I breathed it in, free of the daze his eyes always seemed to leave me in.

Looking at my other guards...my friends, I picked up on their behavioural adjustments in regards to one being hurt. Though his face was as stoic as Heidi's, Demetri's eyes remained on his friend until he was able to stand. As Felix regained his composure, Jane relayed her message, "Aro wishes to see us."

I observed my guards, each waiting for the next move. Jane seemed to be daring anyone to defy her, likely eager to use her gift again. With her brother by her side, they looked like the two most intimidating beings in the entire world and I couldn't imagine anyone even trying to defy them. Even one without the other — but then, I'd already thrown myself to the sharks with Alec. Jane, however...

"I'll just take Saffiya back to her room, then."

Jane's head whipped to Felix and he flinched. This seemed to be enough for her and Felix appeared to get the message. Jane had made her position perfectly clear upon her entrance.

Whatever they were hiding, wasn't to be shared with me.

"The human was going to the library," Jane's eyes fixed onto me. "Were you not?"

I stared back at her, locked in a wave of calm before a storm. I wasn't lost in her eyes, in fact I was barely looking at her. My mind was whirling and I couldn't decide what was more important — whatever secret they were hiding from me or the power of Jane's gift. My behaviour seemed to throw Jane off, but she kept her composure. "Human — Were you not?" She repeated.

Yes, they all knew something that I did not, and even though Heidi and Felix seemed to think this secret was important for me to know sooner rather than later, it could wait. Secrets came out eventually, and there was a lot I didn't know.

Still, I couldn't help the emptiness in my tone as I held Jane's stare, addressing Demetri. "She's right." I blinked, taking a step back from the middle of the group. I received odd looks, as if each vampire perceived my behaviour as off but either didn't care to comment or didn't know how.

Jane had moved on, "Best not to keep Aro waiting."

Heidi and Demetri nodded, taking steps to the throne room. However, Felix hesitated as he looked between me and Jane and Alec.

Jane's smile had returned to her face, although with a more sadistic edge. "Don't worry. Alec won't let her out of his sight." She turned to her brother, who finally moved his eyes from me. "Will you, brother." It was impossible to miss the playful petulance in her tone.

The glare her brother gave her went unacknowledged by Jane as she turned on her heel and led the others away.

I stayed in my spot for a moment, watching their forms disappear down the stairs. Alec had gone back to watching me, his gaze looser then before. I frowned, trying not to become too irritated, too quickly with his presence. After all, I had no idea how long I'd be stuck with him.

"Right." I turned around, moving to push open the library doors. Except, they wouldn't budge. That's another thing — none of the doors in this place would budge without superhuman strength. I get that they were old, but it made no sense for doors to weigh more than an average dog. Which was the best comparison I could come up with in my head at that moment because my sanity had been interrupted by a chiming, mocking short laugh.

I tossed a glare at the useless male over my shoulder, giving another futile push against the library doors. I threw my hands against the door, leaning on them and dropping my head down in-between my arms. I refused to ask him for help. I tried to sneak a glance to see if he would graciously just open the door for me because he knows that it is literally impossible for me to do so. However, I was met with a different sight.

He had leaned one shoulder against the wall to watch me, with his arms crossed loosely over his chest. The position alone was unusually casual and as much as I hated to admit it, it made him undeniably attractive. As if he were reading my mind, a smirk lit up his face with delight at my failed efforts. I could practically see the smugness coming off of him as he caught me looking. No way was I caving now.

I stepped back to examine the doors. I was even less than a feather as far as the inanimate objects were concerned. There was no other entrance and no other options, seeing as Aro had taken everyone who would've done the decent thing by now and just opened the door.

Without thinking it through, I called him out, "wasn't there such a thing as "being a gentleman" wherever, whenever, you're from?" His eyes narrowed at me and I took the hint, Marcus's warning flashing across my mind. I quickly turned my head back to the door and waited for Alec to chew me out or threaten to eat my heart with a fork or something.

"I was under the impression that women in your era were independent." There was a lightness in his voice I had yet to hear and he was definitely messing with me. The idea initiated a slow rising of giddiness before I remembered that I'd been pushing against what I am now positive was just a fake door, for multiple minutes as he simply watched.

I bit my lip, my frustration growing, "yeah, cause chivalry is a scam." He continued to watch me for a few more tries of doing nothing but simply pushing on different pressure points of the doors before I turned to him. "Would you mind..." He raised an eyebrow and I gave him an exasperated glare before putting on my best fake smile. "Please?"

I caught a hint of amusement on his face as he opened the door with his stupid vampire strength and held it open for me.

I gave him a begrudging, "thank you" and once I was safely inside, I added sarcastically, "what a gent".


	7. Distractions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Saffiya asks questions and Alec has a staring problem.

**H** e was staring at me.

From the moment we entered, Alec had been watching me. Not glaring, not simply looking in my direction, just watching. And he wouldn't stop. Even as I disappeared behind bookshelves in my quest for nonspecific books, his eyes were still locked on me when I reappeared.

It was as if he were observing my every move, waiting for me to do something rash. The behaviour was almost protective - but then that would insinuate some level of care about my well-being or even simply, my existence. Which I knew was not the case.

The library was extensive, as only a library developed over hundreds of years could be. It was as if they had transported the library of Alexandria to Italy. There were rows upon rows of elegant bookshelves, each one entirely filled with books older than I'd ever seen. Plus, I think one might've been made out of human skin so I just skipped that section.

The shelves, by the way, were ordered by topics of interest but there was no structure beyond that. which was gathered by subject but surprisingly not organized past that. It wasn't careless, but I expected better from vampires who seemed to have all the time in the world.

We had settled in the very center of the library which was a rounded out area that reminded me of a university's library. There were four wooden tables, the kind where you would scratch out names and society letters. Only these were pristine. I couldn't even find a small dent in the corners of the table I'd chosen.

I had made myself at home on the table, scattering the collection of books I had gathered from around the maze. Books that included information that I had very little ability to comprehend, let alone apply for my intended purpose. Though, I had hope that I might find something that could at least give me an idea of where to begin.

Alec was sitting in an armchair a few feet away, with his elbow resting on the corner in yet another unexpectedly relaxed positioning. He didn't move and he didn't ask me what on earth I was doing, which I was glad for because I barely knew myself.

As I turned a page in an unbelievably useless text, I glanced up to see if Alec had finally found something else to focus on.

He hadn't. Even as I made eye contact with him, he only blinked. He had to be doing this on purpose. There was no way it was just happenstance that he'd literally been eye stalking me throughout the entire room. I took in a deep breath, reminding myself that I would not give in to his childish games. I was better than that. Then, he smirked and the action alone irritated me enough to break.

"Can you stop that?" He raised his eyebrow, as if to question my sudden outburst. As if he didn't know exactly what he was doing. "Looking at me. Can you stop?"

"I could." I sent him the darkest glare I could muster. Was he an English teacher now?

"When are the others coming back?"

He leaned backwards in the chair, lazily folding his hands behind his head before giving me an answer. "They are busy welcoming Aro's guest," he waved a hand towards me dismissively. His eyes had left mine and he closed them as he laid his head back. "I am to babysit."

"I'm not a child." He didn't respond. I was so done with him. "Why you?"

This seemed to get his attention and he probably saw the opportunity to exploit my 'lesser human emotions' because he eyed me from his position and said simply, "In case Aro's guest decides he'd like a convenient snack." I broke contact with him, automatically glancing towards the doors and my reaction seemed to satisfy him.

He chuckled deeply, "don't worry. I'll protect you from the scary vampires." His words sent a chill down my spine that had nothing to do with fear.

I scoffed at his arrogance, returning to my current book and pretending that the vast collection of medical journals inside it were the most fascinating thing I'd ever seen. But a growing impatience refused to dissipate because I could still feel his eyes boring into my head. Fine. If that's how he wanted to play, I'll play.

"Why can't Prosper be my guard anymore?"

He clenched his jaw and finally looked away from me. Score one for Saffiya. "You are a curious human, aren't you?"

"Did you hurt him?" I was referring, of course, to the tiny piece of the overall conversation I'd overheard outside the door. It was gnawing at me and I had planned to just ask the others, but from the way they'd been talking...

"No." I frowned in disbelief and he rolled his eyes. "As soon as he told me you were gone, I went - Aro, sent me to find you."

I hesitated to believe him, but I remembered the top two undone buttons in his tunic when he'd arrived at the pub. Looking at him now, dressed to the nines and topped with a turtleneck, I doubted he ever left his room with a button out of place. "Why haven't I seen him?"

"You could've been damaged." He let out a low growl, "he's never going near you again."

"Stop referring to me as if I'm less than I am. I am not a toy and I am especially not a child. Plus, you're barely older than me, if at all." That damn smirk.

We sank into silence and I chose yet another book from the table, gently flipping it open. But, there was still one more question burning on the tip of my tongue. I stared blankly at the page in front of me. I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna ask him.

"Alec?" I raised my head and red eyes were already on me, as if he knew I wasn't done asking questions. I swallowed, immediately rethinking my strategy.

"Yes, Saffiya?" My shoulders tensed. I'd never heard him say my name before. Was it possible that a word I'd heard thousands of times before, my own name, had never sounded so cherished as it did right now? I wanted him to say it again. To never stop but for fear that I would lose the sensation it gave me

I cleared my throat, shifting my legs before asking, "did Jane?" He raised his eyebrow once more. I went more specific, "did Jane use her gift on him?"

"What is your point, human." I held back a pout, expecting him to have used my name.

"Felix and Demetri said it felt like...fire."

"I would not know."

"But you know how it works, right?" His eyebrows furrowed and he seemed more cautious to continue answering my questions so freely. "Is it an illusion, or —"

"Just be grateful you cannot experience it." That was definitely a threat. This would be a good time to stop asking —"

"But how —"

His voice turned cold, an underlying threat tracing his words. "If you ask nicely, I am sure Jane would be only too willing to try again." Right. So that was the end of that conversation. "Careful what you wish for."

Well, that got me nowhere. He was so sensitive.

I got the impression that I should give Alec some space, so I had gone in search of any other books I could find. Alec hadn't provided me with any additional information throughout any of our brief and spotty conversations in the last few hours. The last one had earned me a reprieve from his staring, at the very least.

If anything, I was the one who had adopted the behaviour, waiting to see if he had started again. Instead, Alec had taken up a chapter book, though I hadn't seen him flip a page since it appeared in his hands.

After a few more minutes, I dropped the silent matter. Perhaps he'd gotten what he wanted or I'd asked just enough questions to make him regret doing it in the first place. Or maybe he wasn't even aware of it.

Pulling out a random medical book, I returned to my spot, flopping into the chair and opening the book with relative care. Though the information in it was the last thing on my mind.

What I was trying to understand, is why, despite everything, was his presence having such a calming effect on me. Maybe I'd just had time to stew in my frustration over the conversation I'd been forced out of with my friends. He'd done nothing but stare at me after all, and as irritating as it had been, he hadn't exactly threatened me — except maybe by proxy. It was almost the exact opposite. Perhaps I was just used to my new situation, more comfortable with the castle and in my expectations of day to day activities.

This seemed to make more sense than Alec's attendance because the last thing his company could ever bring me was this feeling of safety. And yet...

I sighed heavily. I was tired of thinking about Alec. His behaviour was so contradicting that it had me whirling. Yet, I had foreseeably turned him into a mystery. Trying to figure out the reasoning behind the way he acted to the way his name alone created an army of butterflies in my body.

I forced myself to refocus my attention on the book in front of me. Which was useless, because I still had no idea as to what I wanted to find. After flipping impatiently through it, I shoved the offending pages away from me. The behaviour perhaps a bit more attention grabbing than I'd considered.

My body reacted before I'd made the decision and my eyes — for the thousandth freaking time — came into contact with Alec's.

"Would you please stop staring at me?"

"Why?" He was like a three year old and there was absolutely no reason for him to decide that he could now withstand being around me. I don't know what I was more suspicious of — the fact that he hadn't threatened to kill me yet or that I hadn't done the same. Maybe he was trying to rile me up on purpose so that if I did something to him first, he wouldn't get in trouble with Aro for whatever he did to me next.

"It's distracting." He stood and instantly reappeared behind me. Before I could move a muscle, his hand was slowly moving my hair behind my right shoulder. Fingertips tapped at my collar bone as if it were a piano key. My breathing hitched as the pads of his fingers began walking to the strongest center of my pulse. He hummed lowly and my eyes slowly closed of their own accord. As if I wasn't allowing a vampire to test his limits and risking my life.

As he began to trail his fingers to retrace their steps back down my throat, I came to my senses. I jerked forward and turned awkwardly in the chair to face him. "What do you think you're doing?"

However, he didn't acknowledge me, his eyes now on the forgotten book in front of me. His hand disappeared from my body and began playing with the pages of the book. His fingers were long and as flawless as the rest of his skin. He leaned over my shoulder and I could feel his arm rested on the back of my chair, leaning across my shoulders. His face was beside mine and I bit my lip as if it would keep me from looking at him.

Almost immediately, his fingers left the pages of the book and landed on my lips. The behaviour felt strange...intimate. I could feel the pressure of his fingers, lightly but firmly putting a stop to the offending action. "Do not," his gaze lifted from my lips to my eyes and his had darkened substantially from only mere seconds ago. "Do not do that," he whispered lethally. He stayed there for a moment, before returning to the book as if nothing had happened.

"This does not look like a history book."

I blinked, "how did you—"

"Marcus." His eyes scanned the rest of the table before finding the clipboard. My messy scribble was mixed with Felix's surprisingly small cursive and ill formed boxes. "He said the dates—"

I crossed my arms with exaggerated frustration, throwing myself backwards into the chair and using to action to lean away from him. "Are all wrong, yes, I am well aware." Alec was still examining my assignment, more distracted by the page than the rant that followed, "Felix and Demetri refused to give me any hints and apparently Elizabeth doesn't like me very much because she lied about hers but, at least I know her name now."

He didn't answer me, still focused on the paper and while I was glad he was no longer watching my every move, I kind of missed his attention. Not his specifically. That'd be stupid.

And though he was focused on the page, arguably with too much intensity, Alec seemed to be lighter. I got the impression that he was always too consumed with a dark and weighted aura. I couldn't help but wonder if the time we'd spent in the library, alone, provided him with a brief respite. One that he'd never had access to in all his years as a vampire. He felt almost...happier. Well, as happy as Alec could ever be when he wasn't making snide comments.

Alec picked up my pencil and added something to the sheet. And suddenly, he had returned to his chair, a random book in hand. He was no longer watching me.

I looked down. There, next to his and Jane's names, he had written 381 A.D.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:
> 
> Important heads up for the next chapter. I realised I made a mistake regarding the plot and so, to hopefully get back on track, the next chapter is sort of a lay way. As in, it doesn't originally belong after this chapter in the storyline so it may not flow as well. It is also why this chapter (and the next) are so much shorter than the others. Hopefully, you can move past any striking issues because it won't be a problem afterwards. Fingers crossed. I do plan on fixing this in a rewrite but for now, just bear with me if you would :)


	8. Damage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Alec and Saffiya do not get along.

**W** hatever truce that had risen between us in the library seemed to have disappeared literally overnight as Alec returned to being the world's most obnoxiously horrid person.

The entire day, we'd been throwing heedless insults back and forth. It got to the point where even Jane, who had stopped by for a civil game of chess, had left us to our stewing.

It had been only a matter of time before one of us broke first.

He was leading me to the kitchens, neither of us speaking a word to the other after I'd suggested that if he couldn't say anything nice than he shouldn't say anything at all. We'd only made it down two flights of stairs when he finally checked to see if I was still behind him. I was. If keeping ten paces in-between us counted as such.

Alec didn't seem to think so. His eyebrows narrowed as if inconvenienced by my basic human inability to walk at vampire speed. To be fair, ten paces might've been a bit excessive. "Keep up."

"Keep up," I mimicked him in a childish tone under my breath.

He stopped abruptly and I conveniently remembered that vampire hearing was also a thing. Alec seemed taken aback by my words, though it was hardly the worst attitude I'd thrown at him. "You can't speak to me like that." So, he did use contractions. Welcome to the English language, buddy.

I scoffed, "watch me."

His eyes sharpened and his voice lowered, "you do not seem to comprehend how lucky you are —"

This was ridiculous. "In case you forgot, I didn't ask for this. My life is over and it is all your fault." I shoved a hand against his chest but it had no effect on him. Instead, he clenched his jaw, not even bothering to deny my accusation.

Alec took a step towards me, raising his hands as if to physically enunciate what should've been an apology. Except, this action alone triggered a flurry of activity behind my ribcage. He moved towards me again, his face shifting from shame to arrogance.

He smirked, "do I make you nervous?" The deep, huskiness of his voice made my eyes widen, and I swallowed unnecessarily.

"I'm not afraid of you."

"No..." he clicked his tongue. "There is something else..." The implication alone was enough to send a shiver running from my spine down to my knees.

"What are you on about?" He stepped forward again and I now countered his movements.

Watching me with amusement, he repeated the action twice more only to have me do the opposite. "Knock it off."

"Your heartbeat betrays you." I bit my lip and he held out a hand as if to touch my cheek. I closed my eyes, unable to handle the combination of the combustable, emotional response inside me and the anticipation of what he was going to do next.

It wasn't until I felt a light pressure on my arm that I opened my eyes to see him focusing on my bruise. The one he'd caused. It was nearly gone now, more yellow and green that was overtaking the red tones underneath. Bruises weren't always so apparent on my mixed skin, so when they were I knew it was a particularly nasty one.

My eyes widened because he trailing a light finger over the bruise and goosebumps sprung up over my arm. The shame was returning to his expression and as much as he pissed me off, I'd do anything to distract him from his thoughts at that moment. Yes, it was technically his fault, but he clearly hadn't had to spend too much time considering the welfare of a human.

Especially not one that was idiotic enough to throw his own words back at him.

And just when I was convincing myself that he might not be so bad after all; He opened his mouth. "Humans are so fragile. Though I cannot imagine you will be much better as an immortal."

What a prick. "Right, because you're such a dream."

Now I'd done it. He whipped his head to look at me, his palm flattening against my arm before he took hold of my chin. His hair had fallen into his eyes, which were no longer the brightly satisfied colour they had been. Nevertheless, there was a flash in them, a flash of resistance and Alec faltered for the briefest of seconds. Then, it was gone.

"You, girl, are the most insignificant human to ever exist." It was a lame comeback and he knew it.

I pulled away from him, which was easier than I expected so he must have taken Aro's warnings to heart. "Oh yeah? Then, why didn't you just let those boys kill me?"

He gritted his teeth, "clearly, I made a mistake."

Alec turned and stalked away from me, as if to leave me behind in the empty corridor. I blew air out of my lips, bending down to take off my shoe before throwing it right at the back of his head. "HEY!" I missed, of course, but the result was the same. He stopped, his palms curling into tight fists. "You know what I think?"

He appeared in front of me and I tried not to be thrown off by the supernatural factor. He hissed, "I do not care—"

"I think you're sad." He froze and I found myself replacing anger with an unusual sort of empathy. "I think someone hurt you a long time ago and you've been taking it out on the rest of the world ever since. And I think you're too afraid to admit that you're just as broken as any one of us." I took a breath, highly aware of the fact that I stood close enough to him to touch him and my hand was already reaching out when he caught me by the wrist.

His words were venomous, full of poison and ready to strike at any moment, "you do not know anything about me." I pulled my hand back, but his grip on my wrist only tightened.

The fire in my chest began to grow again and I tugged my hand away from him until he finally released me. "Here's my question —" My chest rose and fell with breaths I had to retrieve from my diaphragm, but I was nowhere near done. "Why me? Why was it my life you had to destroy?"

Looking at him made me lose my breath with a fear I'd never felt before. The mere timbre of his tone outlined the restraint he had to maintain to keep himself from doing the one thing he was built to do. Yet, just being near him made my mind became cloudy and irrational and if I didn't stop picking fights with him, I'd probably wind up with teeth marks on my throat.

"What life?" An evil smile appeared on his face, the kind that an evil villain practiced in a mirror. "Chasing after a father who didn't want you." It was the smile the villain prepared for the exact moment he revealed to the hero that he'd killed everyone they ever cared about. "So defected that you could end up killing yourself without a babysitter." That they had destroyed them. "A burden — flawed and insignificant." It was the smile of someone who had already won and he was just getting started.

How could someone so beautiful, be so cruel. He'd already made it very clear that my very existence was the bane of his. I could feel my mouth open, completely and totally at a loss to defend myself. I was no hero. I was just a girl. I'd done nothing to make him hate me enough to make him play the role of a real life villain. He'd done nothing but try to convince me of such since I'd arrived.

Except, I don't believe in villains. Bad guys — sure. But, assigning either role for Alec...I was unconvinced.

Don't get me wrong. His attitude, spiteful words, and misguided hostility made my blood boil and I had definitely played out several cartoon scenarios in which he went splat on the pavement in some construction zone. He had no right to treat me the way that he did. He shouldn't treat anyone with threats and harsh words.

But as much as I wanted to return the favour, I don't think I could. Because even villains...

"At least I'm alive."

A bitter laugh left him and he seemed quite pleased with himself as he left me standing pathetically in the hallway.

"Not for long."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> As I noted in the last chapter - this one is accidentally out of place in the story, so please forgive any cracks in the flow of it. I tried to at least make it connect to the last chapter, but I'm not sure how well that worked out - esp. when you see one of the upcoming the chapters. Which, by the way, was my favourite and one of the first chapters I finished. Can't wait to share it with y'all.


	9. Jane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jane and Saffiya find common ground and Saffiya tests Alec’s patience and bloodlust.

" **Y** ou talk in your sleep." Her voice lilted over from the armchair in the corner of my room. My head snapped over to her, as if to assess a threat. Not that I'd have any kind of upper hand if that were the case. She merely closed the book in her hands with a loud clap and stood. "Did you know?"

She watched me and it took a few seconds for me to register that she was expecting a response, "no." Seeming satisfied with my answer, she returned the book to the bookshelf.

"I thought your brother was supposed to be my guard today?"

Jane raised a single eyebrow. "Would you prefer I go and get him?" Though her words sounded venomous and resentful, there was a tingling sound as if she were teasing me.

"No," I spoke automatically.

"Yes, he has been rather moody as of late. That would be your doing, of course."

I felt guilt overwhelm my stomach, "what did I do to him?" Jane only looked at me, not even a shrug of indifference.

Resigned, I pushed the covers off of me and made my way into the bathroom. I stripped, careful about choosing the levels of both hot and cold before stepping into the shower. I tilted my head back, allowing the water to cascade over my face and down my chest. I breathed out before recognising that I had to get out sooner or later to face the day.

Today was Thursday. The day I was supposed to somehow manage to again sneak out under the noses of the all-hearing, super speeding, watch dog vampires that were to know my whereabouts 24/7.

I'd assumed it would be Alec that I'd have to get past. As he'd complained about having to babysit me while Aro's guest was here. Which, as far as I knew, they were. The plan was loosely based around the fact that I could annoy Alec enough to leave me alone in my room then I could escape. But if Jane were guarding me, I'd have to go back to the drawing board. With a very small time frame. Unless, she was just visiting and her twin would return.

A rush of nerves flew through my stomach as I considered the possibility that Alec would have replaced his twin in the short while I'd been away. That he'd be sitting in a chair or even on my bed —

A cough wracked its way out of my chest at the direction my thoughts were heading. At the feeling it brought up that I didn't quite understand; an inkling in my brain slipped the word desire to the forefront of my mind. I immediately shoved such ideas aside, ashamed at the audacity of my brain to go to such a place. As if.

I quickly finished my routine, eventually stepping out and carefully tucking the towel around myself. I'd be lying if I said I didn't have to convince myself that there was no logical reason for Alec to be in my room. It would just be Jane. Innocent looking Jane with a major dark side and an apparently, insanely painful power that may or may not have an effect on me.

When I did open the door, Jane had chosen another book. She didn't acknowledge my presence and so I made my way over to the excessively large closet. I inspected the rows of clothing, which had been filled by the magic elves that had put my room back together. Even an eternity wouldn't be enough time to wear all of the outfits that filled it up. I eyed the clothes I'd arrived in, purposefully separated from the new clothing. They'd bought me some new jeans and other modern clothing, but I hesitated at accepting expensive gifts. Not to mention the current trends were an incredibly obvious out of place fashion that I'd been wearing around for the past few days.

I glanced to Jane once more, and I think she noticed because she let out a harsh, "what?" I didn't respond, but reached up to pick out a dress that matched hers. I disappeared deeper into the closet and slipped the dress over my head, loosely tying the string that hung at its side behind my back so that it fell to form a tiny bow below my waist.

As I stepped out of the closet, I was attempting to braid my own hair - something I'd never been very good at it. I took a seat at the vanity, turning to face Jane to attempt to strike up a conversation when a cool breeze gently swiped my neck. I realized, with a light tug of my hair, that Jane had taken over my braiding for me. This was confirmed as I caught sight of her in the mirror, intensely focused on my hair. We were silent for a time as she gracefully plaited the strands at a surprisingly patient human pace.

Jane lightly dropped the end of the braid over my shoulder. I glanced up at her through the glass, twirling the end of the braid between my fingers, "thank you." She nodded and we continued watching each other in the mirror.

"Who is Misha?" My face scrunched up in confusion to her knowledge of my recent past. "You asked for him. When you were asleep."

"Misha was one of the nuns that watched after me. My father left me at an abbey when I was eleven and he never came back. It's the closest I've ever had to home, thanks to her." A frown was evident on Jane's face at this information, which surprised me. I assumed it was a response to the religious connection, as she already knew my father was missing. It seemed that only in recent years that a dislike of the church wasn't uncommon. So, religion was likely to have been built into their lives from the beginning, if my guess at history had any weight. Had her experience with it stayed so long into her years as a vampire?

My hand touched the rosary hanging around my neck and as soon as I pulled it out, Jane was in front of me. The tiny cross dangling in-between her index and ring fingers. Just as quick, she dropped it as if it had burned her. Yet, her eyes were still wild with curiosity and I continued my story.

"I wasn't fit to be a nun — I always asked too many questions." A smile graced my lips as I looked down in remembrance of the priest and mother superior's faces whenever I was too logical for the Bible. "And I needed to find my father." I slipped the rosary back under my shirt, my eyelids fluttering closed as they began to sting. I blinked it away and noticed Jane, who was still watching the mirror. Though it seemed she was lost in her own appearance, her own memories.

"They were worried I'd get into trouble because of my condition..." Her eyes flashed back to mine. There it was, the root of her inquisitiveness. "If only their imaginings of possible dangers had spanned as far as vampires."

I saw the corner of her lip tilt upward ever so slightly. "Yes. If only." I stayed silent this time, seeing if she would share a token of her thoughts with me. They seemed to be drowning her and I wondered if maybe she needed saving. I wondered if Alec were the only one that could do so.

I was sure that if she were human, she might have been crying. Not dramatically, but maybe a tear or two before she would brush it away, denying its existence. I mused briefly if her eyes had been the same colour as Alec's when they were human. A stirring in me suggested a temptation to ask her if she remembered, but I remembered Marcus' warning and a more intelligent part of my brain urged caution. "Switch?" I asked her and her head snapped down to me. She seemed to consider my question and I thought she would deny me but she nodded slowly. I stood and she took my place at the vanity.

I released her hair from its beautiful French twist and watched in awe as her locks fell down her shoulders like a wave in the ocean. Slowly, cautiously, I began to separate strands of her hair. She closed her eyes, seeming to lose herself in the behaviour. It was intimate, and not at all what I expected from the girl based on what I'd seen and been told so far. Another reminder for myself of why I liked to make my own opinions regarding new people.

Silence settled around us and I noticed Jane's eyes remained closed, as if returning once again to her earlier trance. She looked so peaceful, delicate, so I left her to it, because this was the first time I couldn't hear my heart racing since I'd entered the castle. I wouldn't say I was carefree, I knew to keep my guard up while in a building with beings that could snap my neck before I even noticed their presence. I wasn't that stupid. But, I was content in Jane's presence and that was enough for now.

After a few moments, she asked me, "what is it like? To have never felt pain?" Jane was watching me carefully in the mirror and I could tell the question bothered her. While I wasn't sure that the answer would provide her with the answers she was looking for, I tried to figure out how to explain it. I hadn't had to do so very often in my life. I bit my lip, automatically glancing in the mirror to check that I hadn't bitten it too hard before knowing where to begin.

"Every morning, I have to check over my body, to make sure I haven't scratched my eyeball in my sleep or bit my tongue in half. I can tell that your skin is cold and a tea kettle is hot, but I wouldn't be able to tell if the tea were burning my tongue." She was looking down in thought, and given her gift I wondered if she was pitying me or if she were jealous. "I can feel textures, the weight of a book, a hug..."

I trailed off and focused on finishing her braid, mimicking what she'd done for me and laying it over her shoulder. Red eyes stared into mine with rapt attention and I was reminded of her brother once again, the almost childish spirit of inquiry gracing her face was unlike any expression I'd seen on his. There was something good in her, and if there was good in her, there had to be some in her brother.

"I've learned about what should be painful by observing others and mimicking them if I receive a similar injury. But it's never clicked in my brain." Jane was looking over my handiwork on her hair when a thought overcame me and I gulped rather noticeably. "I'd give anything to feel pain...the other day with your gift..."

"You responded." I nodded. "Barely." I nodded again, remembering how she had almost attacked me in frustration. How Alec had stopped her...

She continued to stare at me and I took that as an opening to present my evidence of why she should do what I had yet to request from her. "Any sliver of pain would - it would likely be overwhelming for me, as I've nothing to compare it to. I could pass out, I could—"

"You want me to use my gift on you, do you not?" She dropped down into the same armchair, relaxed, yet guarded. I cautiously shook my head up and down in confirmation. "Just what are you expecting to happen, human?" Her tone was cold and I struggled to refrain from shivering.

I swallowed again and gave her my half baked idea that I'd spent hours trying to research.

I moved away from the chair, trying to find the right words. "If you could break through that wall in my brain...maybe you could make it fall."

"You believe the pain will trigger your brain into becoming normal." She wasn't looking at me, her eyebrows furrowed in thought. "It is a loose theory."

My shoulders fell, looking away as I prepared to apologise for even suggesting it.

"But," she continued, "I do enjoy my gift."

I turned back around to face her. She had risen from the chair. Her irises already empty and focused on me.

There was less of a delay this time and when the wave hit me, there was no denying it. I let out a small cry - out of both surprise and what I could only assume must have been pain. And it hurt - a lot. It was all warmth, except it flickered, like when you put your hands up to a fire as it danced, the ends of the flames striking towards you and away the next second. There was even a slight calm to the rush of pain, despite it taking my breath from me. I began to gasp for air, another strangled sound escaping me before it stopped — suddenly and without explanation.

The doors to my room flew open and through the tears that had begun to fill my eyes, I made out the form of Alec in the doorway. "What have you done?" He snapped at his sister, appearing at my side on the floor. I hadn't even noticed that my knees had buckled because my mind was whirling. The pain was unimaginable and it had only been a taste of what she could do. I felt dizzy, nauseous and I never wanted to feel anything like it ever again.

At the same time, I felt normal. For the first time in my life, the one thing that had always separated me from everyone else was no longer impossible. All because of her gift. I raised my gaze to meet Jane's, recognizing the shock and a fear that couldn't be helped reflecting back at me. She quickly examined my knees but noticed no other outward sign of my former distress and in the next second, her gaze snapped back to her brother, void of the emotions we'd exchanged.

"I was only complying with her request, brother." She informed him innocently, a small evil smirk on her face. My eyelids fluttered, the memory of her gift's effect only just fading despite the initial feeling being gone. Alec let out a deep sigh and suddenly his hand lightly encased my forearm, lifting me to my feet. I couldn't quite stand and he uncharacteristically wrapped a gentle arm around my waist to support my weight.

I could feel his eyes on me as they scanned my body for any outward signs of harm, just as his sister had done. Only this was different. It was as if he were drinking me in, every part of my body despite the fabric covering it. I briefly wondered if vampires also had x-ray vision and I bit my lip. Which immediately drew his eyes to them.

Apparently satisfied with his assessment as he growled to his sister, "never again."

She shrugged dismissively, and left us alone. Though, before she stepped out of the door, she blinked at me and I think she was watching to see if I regretted asking her. I tried to nod or make any acknowledgement that it was okay that wouldn't set Alec off but she was gone before I could do so. It hit me a moment later, because I was too out of it to complain about her absence, but my breath caught in my throat as I processed my situation. Even though Jane's talent terrified me, her brother's presence made my blood run cold. And here I was, alone with him once again.

I didn't have much time for recovery before Alec spoke, "that was incredibly stupid. Angering her - on purpose." He almost sounded worried, but I dismissed it as concern for his sister's decisions.

I could barely muster the courage to speak and I wanted to keep my head down, because I could feel him glowering down at me. I chose not to correct his assumption because if he disapproved of her using her gift then I doubted he would take as kindly to our reasoning behind it, "I was curious." A hand softly lifted my chin to see how he scowled at me with a look that I'm sure was meant to convey his utter distaste for my existence. The contrast in these actions — the careful touches and the disciplined hatred of my humanity — triggered a burst of rage which bubbled in my stomach. He was so contradicting. His attitude prompted my unbridled defiance and I struggled to keep it in.

"Curiosity killed the cat." He chided me, releasing my chin and dragging me over to the corner armchair. He dropped my body into the plush cushion like a rag doll and I thought that just because he could, didn't mean he had to treat me like I was as worthless as an old toy.

"I didn't think-"

My next words caught in my throat as his face appeared in front of mine, my body trapped as his hands came to grip the sides of the armchair. I tried to dig myself back into the cushion, but my efforts were futile as I found myself no further from him. "No - you did not." His red eyes met mine and my breath caught in my throat, the same exhilarating feeling racing through my chest as I couldn't help but stare back. "Next time, you might not be so lucky."

As he began to turn away, I could feel it rising in me, that deep anger of injustice and I couldn't stop myself. "What do you care? You're just dying for the day Aro gives you permission to kill me."

"Do not test me."

"Bite me!"

He let out a low growl at my sudden bravery and in less than a millisecond, my back was slammed against the wall and I know it should've hurt, but I still felt nothing. It made me want to ask Jane to try again, as twisted as it was. It wasn't that I was attracted to the pain, at least not in a masochistic way. Rather, I believed that there was a high possibility that my theory would work. If only we could try one more time.

As I opened my eyes, two hands landed on the wall on either side of my face, trapping me once more. Involuntarily, my heart skipped a beat and it registered in my brain that I was not safe right now. Alec seemed to have forgotten his lecture from Aro about being gentle with me the angrier I made him. I wanted Jane to return - anyone, because only my nightmares could express how truly terrified I was to be alone with Alec. But there was no way I'd ever let him know that. Until his lips curled up into a smirk and I realized that my heart was beating faster than it ever had in recent memory — and he could hear it.

He leaned closer to me, his lips automatically finding themselves inches from the dip in my collarbone. As my heart beat increased in speed, a low chuckle escaped him and he trailed his nose along my collar bone and up my neck. I couldn't help the involuntary shiver at the surprising warmth of his breath as it conflicted with the cool touch of his skin. While I could barely register the difference, my body seemed to pick it up without a problem. His lips reached my ear and he stopped breathing, taking a moment.

"Watch your tongue," he murmured dangerously, his eyes meeting mine and sending the butterflies in my stomach into another flurry of activity.

Just like that, he released me. My hands found the wall of their own accord, needing something to ground them to the earth. My breathing grew heavier and the bad kind of butterflies knocked around recklessly in my stomach. He was looking at me with contempt and I frowned. There was no way he was winning this one.

"You first."

A feral growl escaped his mouth and he raised his hand back, as if to knock me down for my insolence. But it never came. My eyes fluttered open to see that Alec's hand had been captured in its drawn back position by the most unlikely of saviours.

"That is enough."


	10. Restraint

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Saffiya shares a theory and Demetri and Felix let secrets slip.

" **B** est not to damage the human, brother."

Alec pulled his wrist back from her grip, a reluctant glare matching his sister's as they stared each other down. He was the first to back off.

"Sister," he acknowledged her.

Why had she returned? Not that I was complaining.

As if to answer my question, she stated, "Aro wishes to see her." They both stood in front of me, neither one seeming to want to leave me alone with the other. Then Jane cautioned forcefully, "you need to feed."

The dark smoke had indeed returned to fill his irises. Realization spread across his face and he angled his head away from me. Coal black hair fell across the side of his face, fully blocking my view of him.

"I'm fine." His chest stopped moving in response to the deep intakes of breath he'd been using before Jane's arrival. He stepped away, turning his back on me completely. "Get her away from me." Something shoved against my chest in response to his sentence, as if the words themselves wanted to further elucidate how little he wanted to do with me. To be honest, even if it wasn't exactly news, it hurt my feelings and I think it showed on my face because Jane interrupted my moment of self pity.

"Come." She indicated that I follow her and I did, but I couldn't stop glancing back to Alec every few steps.

Everything had happened so quickly. Every little thing I did seemed to infuriate him to the point of losing control. The part of me that should've pointed this out and stopped me from egging him on was nowhere to be found during any interaction we had. It was simply him, me, and a lack of self-control from either of us.

Yet the anger and fear that had been recklessly in charge of the wheel only moments ago, had vanished. In fact, the remnants of the overwhelming emotions seemed to fade the further I got from him. Alec seemed to be the fuel to a fire that I didn't even know existed in me. It made me feel alive, and if I could learn to control it -

In one instant, he looked back at me.

"Saffiya." Jane's voice pulled me away. I had stopped in the middle of the hallway and she was watching me with an almost pitying expression, but she pressed on. "Aro is expecting us."

I glanced back again, but he was gone.

As I fell into step with Jane, the silence we so often found ourselves enjoying together settled in between us. And as usual, I was the first to break it. "Jane, about earlier..." She lazily raised her head to acknowledge my words, so I continued. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to anger you. I was just...curiosity killed the cat, I suppose..." I rubbed my arm, the apology escaping me without forethought.

There was no response from her for a second and I worried that I'd damaged whatever form of association we had with each other. "But satisfaction brought it back." She was wearing a disarming smile and I released a small breath in relief.

With nothing else to say, our silence returned. It was short-lived, however, as we turned a corner to a single short hallway. A pair of double doors settled, almost hidden, in the cubby of the hallway. I took a step forward, but was interrupted as Jane held out her arm in front of me.

It was her turn to interrupt the quiet. "He wouldn't have done it."

"Huh?" She rolled her eyes and I wondered if she was more annoyed with me or her brother for the start to the morning. Though there was a softness in her tone as she continued, similar to the one with which she spoke to her twin.

"Alec would never lay a hand on you."

Sarcastically, I chimed, "you sure about that?" The immediateness of her response stung.  
"Yes."

I expected her to be fixing me with a glare and prepared to test her gift on me, this time without my consent. Only, she wasn't. She regarded me with a kind of inward contemplation, as if she were as unsure of the situation as I was. I didn't see fit to challenge her. For one, I knew I'd lose. But for some reason, despite the show of exact opposite behaviour from her brother, I believed her. I nodded and she accepted this, pushing open the doors.

The room was new to me. It was extravagantly simple, the definition of sophistication and culture. The room rounded in the shape of an oval and was about half the size of either of the throne rooms. The walls were made of bookshelves, save for the door Jane and I had just entered from. Unlike the library, these books were carefully organized and delicately maintained.

On either side of the doors stood two guards. One of them, Demetri. The empty expression they all seemed to have when they were on duty enveloped his face and he didn't so much as glance at me. They were like the queen's royal guard and I finally understood the connection of referring to the Volturi as royalty.

In the back of the room, Marcus was seated at a table, frozen as ever with a pen clenched in his hand and a piece of parchment paper curled up under it. In the corner, striking white blonde hair introduced Caius with his back to us, one arm holding up a heavy looking book and the other hand twirling around a standing globe.

Aro was in the middle of a chess match with a man I'd yet to meet. The man was the most normal looking vampire I'd ever seen within the walls of the Volturi's castle. Head to toe 21st century attire, his posture was as elegant as any vampire if not only slightly less dated than Caius or Marcus's. A curious smile rested on his face as we made eye contact. Gold.

Aro and his guest were the only ones to acknowledge our entrance.

The leader of the Volturi stood gracefully, softly dancing over to me and Jane. "Ahh, Saffiya!" The lilt of his accent was distinct, treating each syllable of my name to its own individual attention. "I was just telling Carlisle of your unique condition."

The man, Carlisle, stood to meet me and held out a hand. I followed the societal expectation and shook it. "I've heard wonderful things about you, Saffiya."

Aro reclaimed the conversation. "We heard your cries," his eyes flickered to Jane. "Jane has informed us it was of your own free will."

As polite as ever, I replied, "yes, sir." He raised a hand to ask for mine and I fulfilled his request without a second thought. When he was satisfied, he dropped it.

"A fascinating theory indeed, my dear." He stepped away from me and glanced to the side. "Would you mind sharing it with Carlisle?"

Sure, I'll just spill my entire life story to a stranger like a circus freak. "I have a rare condition —"

"Congenital insensitivity to pain." I confirmed this.

"The first time Jane used her gift on me, it didn't effect me right away. Eventually, I did feel a small pressure that I associated with what could be as close to pain as I've ever gotten." He was staring at me with rapt attention, seeming fascinated by a topic no stranger I'd ever met knew much about. Yet, his focus implied a more comprehensive understanding than the bare minimum of what Aro may have told him. "It hurt, a lot, but I believe that it was because I'd never experienced the feeling before. It wasn't until I saw Felix's response to it that I thought it might be possible for Jane's gift to overpower the wires crossed in my brain."

"To rearrange the neurological blocks?" He tapped a finger to his chin, regarding me with a sterner, more professional tone. "And what did you discover?"

"It worked. But only for her gift." Carlisle nodded, processing the information in the way only an intellectual would. That is, slowly and completely. "I'd like to try again, if Jane is willing." I couldn't see her as she'd moved behind me, but both Aro and his friend seemed to spend a moment observing her reaction to this.

Carlisle folded his hands together, regarding me with a mix of curiosity and concern. "The experiment in itself does contain several risks," he pointed out and I provided him with a patient smile.

"My life is a risk, Mr. Carlisle."

He nodded, tilting his head in thought once more before turning to his friend, his tone just as patient as mine. "Aro, have you considered the change?"

"We haven't set a date, yet, old friend."

Carlisle hesitated, looking to me once more before addressing Aro. "We should discuss it."

Before I could ask what exactly this stranger could have to say about my impending future, Aro spoke, bringing us back to the matter at hand. "Since there is no bad blood," I found his choice of words to be a tactless choice of phrasing considering their diet and my current human status. "You would be content if Jane were to remain as one of your guards?"

"She is not the guard I want to avoid, sir." I heard a snicker from behind me, but it was ignored by the room. Aro raised an eyebrow, and Marcus and Caius seemed to finally take interest in the conversation, though I had no doubt they'd been listening in prior to. As much as he appeared to lead, I doubted that the tokens and perspectives the two men contributed would be undervalued by Aro.

"And whom would that be, dear one?" I refrained from scoffing. As if he didn't already know.

Still, I played his game. "Her brother."

Jane had reappeared in the side of my vision and her head whipped around to me so fast, she might have torn it off her spine. While I pretended not to notice, there was a small rock of regret in my stomach. I could feel the focus of the room's occupants shift to Aro. Only it wasn't him that spoke.

"There is no one safer for you to be with than Alec, Saffiya." I squinted at this, feeling slightly betrayed. I thought Marcus and I were tight.

I couldn't help it, "has anyone told him that?" Carlisle coughed, turning away. But once he looked back I definitely saw a twinkle of amusement on his face. Glad my misery brought someone some giggles.

Aro also failed to hide his cheer, though it lacked the same genuine spirit as Carlisle's. "Perhaps a short respite, then?" He suggested and without waiting for my opinion, "Demetri."  
The man appeared beside me. "Master."

"See if you can find a more engaging activity for Saffiya."

Demetri bowed his head to the masters, sending me a wink when his head was down before leading me out of the room like a shepherd. The door closed behind us and I opened my mouth to question him about where he was taking me but he slid a finger to his lips. I huffed impatiently, but obeyed as I trailed behind him.  
The further we got from the study, the more Demetri's energy levels increased. He was practically hopping by the time he finally decided we were far enough away to fill me in.

Stopping abruptly, he moved to stand directly in front of me, taking hold of my shoulders. With the guise of an incredibly serious nature, he inquired, "have you ever seen American fighting? WWE?"

"Yes. The nuns got together religiously every Sunday to watch Americans knock each other around."

He gaped at me. "You're joking?" "Of course I am." He pouted. So as not to disappoint him, I asked, "what is it then?"

"Wrestling!" He exclaimed excitedly and I couldn't help but laugh, his positivity amping me up.

"Felix and I are supposed to practice right now and he's typically got the upper hand."

Gee, wonder why. "Cause he's a giant?" Demetri moved his head up and down intensely, brimming with determination. "Exactly. But this time, you're gonna be my secret weapon."

The sarcasm was evident as it coated my words, "yes, I'm sure I would make an excellent weapon against a vampire."

"Just tell him about what happened this morning." With that, he threw open the door to what he and Felix had referred to on our tour as the training room. It was, without a doubt, the most modern room in the Volturi's castle. It could've been taken straight from a university catalogue as one part of the room resembled what could only be described as half fancy cafeteria, half elegant study hall. Which may have been underselling it, still, it was immediately obvious to me that there was no way any of the three masters spent any time in the room. Judging by the variety of furniture and activities, I assumed it must be a space for the guard members to gather. Like a teacher's lounge, only more inclusive.

The doors opened, on the far right side of the room, into an array of modern, yet classy, sofas and chairs. Bookcases spread out around the area, some holding an additional entourage of chapter books while another was filled with board games lazily shoved on top of each other. The seating was arranged in small clusters, meant for small groups to gather and chat comfortably. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't imagine a single member of the coven doing so in an every day routine.

Towards the middle of the room, there were tables, two chairs per each. Assumably, the setup was meant for chess or a similar game. A large circular table in the middle could've been used for anything but, someone had failed to clean up a recent game of mahjong.

On the far side, it was clear where the room's name had come from. It was empty of any additional trinkets or tables, as its main purpose was clear. This entire side was claimed by a giant mat that reminded me of a gymnastics class I'd taken once as a kid. I had twisted my ankle in the first five minutes and never went back. This was a practice mat and judging by the various markups and tears, it was quite popular.

Felix was flicking around pieces on a checkers board when we entered. He jumped up gratefully at the opportunity for interaction and I had a feeling he had very little patience when it came to board games.

"Fiya!" New nickname. I bit my lip, not too sure how I felt about it. Felix ruffled my hair in greeting, which I quickly smoothed back as soon as his hand left my head of curls. My reaction cause him to chuckle and I beamed up at him.

"Hullo, Felix."

He pulled out a chair for me at a table and I squinted suspiciously. He'd done the exact same thing before giving me 'Aro's homework assignment'. Once I did take a seat, he was prompted to investigate my progress on the very topic, "how's the homework?"

"I'm still missing a few of the guards' dates. Including Prosper." I'd tried to talk to the different guards while Alec was guarding me the last two days. But he was such a bully to both me and the others, that nobody really wanted to talk to me past providing their birth years. Which was more counterproductive than I liked, seeing as I actually wanted to remember them. Eventually, I'd given up. Alec's mood had, however, remained as sour as ever.

"And the twins', right?"

I shook my head, remembering that day in the library. "Alec wrote it down himself."

"You actually asked him?"

Shaking my head once more, "I didn't have to. Marcus did."

The two men gasped dramatically, winking at each other. "That sly old dog." I scrunched up my face at the idea of Marcus being described as a 'sly old' anything.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing!" Felix chirped. "Demetri, you ready?"

In the least casual manner possible, Demetri indicated his head towards Felix when the man's back was turned, "Fiya's gonna watch."

Right. Distraction. "So, Felix. I met Aro's friend today." I lamely offered up the story. I wasn't the best at storytelling, usually including either too much detail or the wrong ones. Though, Demetri didn't seem to have any preference so long as I talked.

"Nooo," Demetri whined. "Start at the beginning."

Apparently, the plan was for me to tell Felix about my morning in the hopes that it would distract him enough for Demetri to get the upper hand. As Demetri went flying across the room, it was clear that it hadn't worked.

Though Demetri was smaller and more agile, Felix's strength seemed to be the ultimate upper hand. He was unbeatable and their matches were the opposite of any fight scene you'd watch in an underdog movie. It had only gotten more embarrassing for Demetri once Heidi had joined us. Felix seemed to take even more joy out of embarrassing him in front of the woman.

Especially when Demetri got a bit arrogant and like a child, told us to "watch this" as if he had gained any inch of the upper hand against Felix.

I'd been assigned the role of referee. Though the job had gotten a bit dull after the first nine rounds of Felix shoving Demetri's face against the mat. They were moving at a normal speed so I could clearly see. The playfulness of their competitive natures was amusing, enough so that despite a small break for food, I'd been able to watch them battle it out for a considerable amount of time. Heidi had brought a colouring book though, and I was grateful for the side hobby.

Felix rose from a crouch, standing in front of me as Demetri tried to recover across the room. He pulled up the sleeve of his shirt. They had been wrestling in full formal attire, which should have have been put into consideration before they started. However, their attire didn't hinder their movements in the slightest and I quickly realized that that was the purpose. If they were to fight, they likely wouldn't be wearing yoga pants or basketball shorts — not that I could imagine them in either. Like me, they didn't sweat so it wasn't a factor. Their only concerns would be for outside damage like rips, which so far had been avoided, or mud, which was not a feature of the inside wrestling mat.

"How many is that?" How many times had he absolutely destroyed Demetri's pride?

"I stopped counting." A victorious Cheshire smile revealed Felix's teeth as he put his hands on his hips, gloating to the rest of the room.

Heidi rolled her eyes, "does this really entertain you?"

I shrugged, "it'd be more fun if I could actually get in the ring. But for now, I'm satisfied watching Demetri get his butt kicked."

"Hey!" Demetri trampled over and the men seemed to have agreed to a brief time-out for a higher purpose: Gossip.

"Heidi — get this! She actually enjoys being around Jane."

My mouth dropped open as they revived the conversation topic for what was most likely the eighth time today. "It confounds me how you're so upset by this."

However, the shocked expression on Heidi's face was proof that the men may not have been overreacting. "You mean she hasn't threatened to kill you?" I shook my head avidly, for some reason determined to defend Jane. "I would have lost that bet."

"You bet on whether or not Jane would kill me?" I wasn't sure whether to be amused by the audacity of the statement or alarmed by how casually she considered my life.

"Chelsea thought she would just ignore you," Heidi explained, "but I was sure she would've tried to tear you apart by now."

I pointed towards Demetri and Felix. "That's what they said. I get that her gift is scary, but she's—"

"— the most feared vampire in the world." I frowned, not doubting the claim but disturbed by the implication. Most feared was a negative association, as if there were something evil about Jane. I could fathom it and I'd certainly seen it, but the puzzle piece didn't seem to fit. "Her and Alec, of course."

"Jane is...nice." I didn't know of a more suitable word to use. I'd left out several details in my recount of the morning events to the boys. Jane and I's interactions were always private and I had a feeling she wouldn't appreciate if I told the entire castle that she had a gentle side where she softly giggled every time she tried to cheat at chess. That it instantly gave her away and made the game more fun. Felix and Demetri would probably die if I were to tell them that she giggled. If they hadn't already seen it, there was no way she wanted them to know that side of her. "It's her brother with the murder agenda."

"He's changed since you arrived." She met my eyes and quickly reassured me, "in a good way, I think."

I considered the idea for a moment, the suggestion contrasting sourly in my head. "Jane said he's been moody."

With a lilting laugh, she informed me that, "the twins seem to have switched personalities on you."

"How so?" I turned away from Demetri and Felix, questioning the woman's perspective. However, her opinion was drowned out by Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum.

"Jane's usually the one throwing temper tantrums —" Felix was cut off as Demetri came barreling towards him and managing to knock him on his back, propelling him a few feet away. Demetri winked at Heidi, grinning proudly before finishing Felix's sentence.

"Alec's usually the one taming her." He shouted out as he caught sight of Felix running towards him. He met him in the middle with a loud crash. Newly invigorated, the two men began darting around the room at vampire speed, no longer interested in slowing down to show off.

I looked to Heidi for clarification, relying on the fact that she wasn't one to mince words. "You bring out the...passion, in Alec."

I snorted, "right, because I exude impetuous passion that attracts righteous jerks that like to threaten my life."

"In a way..." Heidi smirked, "your blood is practically begging him to come and suck you dry 24/7." My eyes widened as a loud bellow came from one of the guys on the other side of the room at the innuendo, followed by another crash.

My mind flashed back to the alley. Running through every detail of events since that day. Each time, Alec's eyes, a deep burgundy one moment and black as sin the next. To the tap tap tap of his fingers on my pulse in the library and right up to this morning. When his lips had hovered at my neck, the rise and fall of his chest producing airy breaths that tickled the sensitive skin.

A small gasp left me as my hand snapped to my neck. "Oh my god." Heidi gave me a weird look before she appeared in front of me, forcing my hand away.

"What is it? I wanna know!" Felix whined from a headlock in the other corner. His heightened interest in the conversation now having the impact Demetri had originally intended for their competition.

"He was making me so mad — I didn't even consider..." Suddenly, Demetri and Felix joined us and the three vampires crowded in a circle around me. They all peered down at me as I took my hand back from Heidi and ran two fingers deliberately across my neck. I could make out a small bump around my collar bone. "I told him to bite me."

Felix let out another extravagant laugh, causing Demetri to take full advantage of his diverted attention and flip him back onto the middle of the floor. Felix was still giggling, unfazed by his defeat, as he rolled around on the mat in theatrical amusement. In-between the laughter, I could pick out his words, "he gave...a hickey!" If I weren't so stunned, I would've blushed in embarrassment.

"Didn't know Alec had it in him."

"I've got to give Alec some credit," Heidi shrugged, returning to her chair across from me. "When I found mine, it took me only seconds to drain her."

"When you found your what?" She ignored me, inspecting the design on her nails. I noted that her interest in art seemed to extend past her wallpaper. Each nail had its own intricate design reminiscent of the 20's flaunting art deco style.

Felix chimed in, "from the way I learned about it, I couldn't believe the Cullen's pet lasted as long as she did."

Demetri offered his two cents, jogging back over to our table with Felix casually following behind him. "I'll bet you Alec can last longer than the Cullen did."

There were so many secrets that they used to whisper, but now discussed right in front of me without ever clueing my in to the topic. The bits and pieces I did pick up, only fuelled my curiosity. They continued to banter and I felt that curiosity mutate into the unfamiliar rage that had attached itself to me. I needed to get control over myself. I'd always been a tad temperamental but nothing so overwhelming as the emotional immaturity that seemed to plague my behaviour in the last few weeks. I pushed the raw emotion aside, not wanting to explode at them in a melodramatic fashion.

Taking a deep breath, I insisted, "can someone please tell me what you're all on about?" They all gave me a quick glance before exchanging expressions with each other. I shot daggers at Felix, the one with the weakest willpower of the group. He couldn't help it — the man loved to gossip.

As Felix opened his mouth, Heidi stood abruptly, "you're on your own. I want no part in pissing him off." She dawned a brilliant mask of dominance, but she seemed almost...scared. With that, she strutted flawlessly out of the room. Her departure left a a certain heaviness that captured the air in the room. Had I asked for too much?

Left to their devices, Felix looked to Demetri, who nodded and took Heidi's seat. Felix pulled a chair from a neighbouring table and sat beside me. "What do you want to know?"

I swallowed. I'd expected them to throw me some curveball answer, but this — I could finally get the answers I'd been dying for. "What did Heidi mean? She has to give Alec credit?"

"It's called la tua cantante. As Heidi put it, oh so delicately, your blood calls to Alec. Arms waving, voice shouting — well, actually singing, but you get it." I frowned, confused by another factor but Felix guessed my follow up and answered, "More than any other human's."

Not one to miss out on the action, Demetri included, "It's extremely rare. You, dolcezza, are a delicacy."

My gaze dropped to the floor as I worked to process the information and assume the implications. I had to ask my questions carefully, but my emotions, again, got the better of me. I whispered hoarsely, "so, you're all keeping me alive so Alec can drink my blood at some random future interval?" Betrayal hit me like whiplash as I prepared to move away from them. A gentle hand on my knee stopped me.

"No. Aro will turn you." I stared at the hand. It was flawless, smooth, as Alec's had been, courtesy of the venom in their veins. But it was different. It didn't bring me the same calm that his did. Calm. How could I ever be calm in his presence, especially with this new information. I felt small. The kind of small that engulfed the senses when you contemplated the universe. Where you ended up in a maze and every turn challenged your beliefs and questioned your free will. I felt small and I hated it.

My hand began to shake and I balled it up into a fist, placing it down onto the table as I demanded more information. "Then why are you making a bet to see who can last longer between him and...Colon?" Out of the corner of my eye, I could see the two men exchange timid looks.

Felix corrected me, "Cullen. You met Carlisle Cullen earlier. His coven is...unique."

"Stay on topic, Felix." Another secret.

Felix appeared to heed his warning, as Demetri backed off, his hand dropping from my knee. "A few years ago, Carlisle's 'son', as he refers to him, met a human who happened to be his blood singer-"

"Le tia...?" He nodded.

"La tua cantante. Only, instead of drinking her blood...he fell in love with her." An eye roll, "he refused to change his mate into a vampire." Felix relaxed a little as he noticed that I was no longer in fight or flight mode. He spoke with a relatively laissez-faire observance of the story, though the hint of irritation was clear in his choice of words. "She knew our secret, however, and so, by our laws, he didn't really have a choice."

"Mafia." Felix cracked a smile at my taunt and continued,

"She was his mate, so it was an inevitable situation." He folded his hands behind his head and leaned his chair back on two legs. I refrained from trying to kick one of the legs out of balance to see if he'd fall, recognizing that this was not the time for such antics. "Long story short, his stubbornness for her to remain human created an unfortunate avalanche of events that were easily avoidable. As a result, their little love story caused quite a few problems, which is why Carlisle visits once a year. He's trying to repair the damage his coven caused us."

Demetri interrupted with an uncharacteristically scathing statement, "but the Volturi do not forget."

They waited for my response and I tried to come up with a reply that had to do with anything but the one question the story thrust into my head. Except I couldn't.

Reluctantly, I punched away butterflies as I deadpanned, "You're messing with me, right?" I squinted at each, moving my head back and forth, less than 1% serious as I continued to clarify, "are you trying to tell me that Alec is in love with me because I'm his...compadre?" They seemed to dismiss the idea with a wave.

"Cantante — learn Italian, woman!"

Demetri and I both ignored him. "We're just trying to explain that being around you is...difficult for him."

I scoffed, "the feeling is mutual."

"Minus the whole extreme temptation to drink your blood thing."

I groaned, pushing away from my chair and throwing my hands up in the air. "It's like Aro has a death wish on my behalf." I turned back around to face them and both men stood at attention, as if they expected me to either go on a tangent or throw some more furniture around. Either way, they planned to be there with me. "If it's so hard for Alec not to kill me, and Aro wants to keep me, then why does he refuse to take him off my 'protective detail'?"

"He has his reasons." I glared at Demetri, before pulling my chair to me and plopping down in it with my arms crossed.

"Yeah? Well, I don't know what they are. But they're stupid." Demetri chuckled beside me as I ranted. "I mean, Alec hates me."

Felix spoke up a little too quickly, "he doesn't hate you."

"Well, I hate him." I didn't. I don't think I hated anyone. But the claim obviously held more weight for the two of them as they immediately sat up to rebut the declaration.

"Don't—" I raised my eyebrow and Felix hesitated, ignoring the warning look from Demetri. He sighed, "listen...It's near impossible to resist your blood singer and he is obviously not handling it well. Maybe just give him a chance?"

I couldn't believe they were sticking up for him. All they did was give his sister crap and makes jokes about how rude he was to me. But now they were defending and supporting him, as if it mattered. They shouldn't want me to get closer to Alec. It would be safer for me if he were to stay far away from anything remotely related to me. That is, if they truly wanted to keep me alive. It wasn't exactly rocket science.

"Felix, he hasn't earned a chance! The first time I met him, he killed someone in front of me."

Demetri piped in. "For you."

"Sorry?"

"He saved your life."

I stared at him incredulously, "by killing someone?" A disbelieving cough clung to my throat, "are you mad?"

"We're vampires. Murder to you is a meal to us." It was a harsh reality that I constantly needed reminded of. They were vampires. Humans weren't people, we were things. Food. I suddenly had a real appreciation for cows. "Just another way to look at it."

Felix brushed invisible dust off of his tailored pants. "As far as Alec is concerned, you're here. Whether they are or not is irrelevant."

I shook my head back and forth so hard it made my head ache little. "Are you trying to tell me I should thank him?"

"Saffiya," Demetri's voice gained my attention away from Felix. "That night, the four of us were returning from a mission. We all heard you running, we knew what was happening. Alec was the one who broke rank."

Felix butted in, far too relaxed as he leaned back on two chair legs once more. "If you ask me, those boys got off easy compared to what Alec did to Prosper." He snorted, completely missing yet another warning from Demetri. "When Prosper lost you? Phew, it took Santiago a long time to put him back together."

Demetri rumbled lowly, dropping his head into his hands. "Damn it, Felix."

Felix whipped around, his gaze landing on me and my wide eyes. He quickly realised his mistake, but it was too late. Another secret spilled from Pandora's box and they couldn't put it back. I was already hooked.

"What are you talking about?"

His face fell with every word. "...you didn't know."

"Why would he go after Prosper?"

He hesitated, but couldn't seem to keep his mouth shut. "With the whole, you know 'blood thing'...by our, I guess...vamp commandments..." He stumbled over his own words, trying to make it seem like he hadn't given me more information than he should've. But it was impossible to hide what had escaped the shadows. "You kind of belong to Alec." I flinched at the suggestion. "And Prosper—"

"—didn't do anything wrong. I tricked him." Felix desperately turned to Demetri, who was just lifting his head from his shell. Poor Felix, in his attempt to help ease my concern, was only making things worse. It appeared that Heidi had made the right decision.

"Go," Demetri muttered. "I'll take her back to her room."

Felix rubbed the back of his head, shoulders dropping uselessly. "Sorry, Fiya." He placed a large hand on my head and with that, he was gone.

I could feel Demetri's eyes on me as he contemplated his next move. However, I was stuck in a trance, four words repeating themselves over and over in my head.

"He lied to me." I wasn't sure why I felt so betrayed. Alec had even less reason to tell me the truth than he did to lie to me. But he had given me an answer when he could've just refused to say anything or pretended I hadn't asked. There was nothing for him to protect in a lie. He didn't care what I thought of him so he didn't have to hide anything from me. So, why did he?  
Demetri stood. "Come on. I'll take you back to your room," he repeated. I silently followed his lead, crossing my arms tightly over my chest as we walked side by side down the long halls.

When we'd arrived at my room, we stopped in unison in front of my door. "Fiya..." the nickname meant to soften his intent but it was still unfamiliar. I'd never been called anything but my full name. I regretted that it didn't do what Demetri intended, "with you being his blood singer...Not everyone finds what you are to him and he's doing his best."

"His best is mean."

"It doesn't excuse his behaviour." Demetri nodded fervently, trying to appeal to a more agreeable side of me. "But now that you know," like Felix, he seemed to struggle with his words. However, in a more well-thought out manner, he suggested, "you've hardly had a non-hostile moment with him since you've arrived. Maybe it's time for a different approach."

I couldn't keep the bitter tone from my tongue, "what? Be the bigger human?"

Demetri relented, pushing open my door for me. "I have to return to the masters."

I stepped inside the door, spinning around at his words, "wait, I thought I was supposed to have a guard at all times?"

He tilted his head. "I suspect Alec will be back soon then," and he winked in an attempt to change the mood, but the sparkle didn't reach his eyes.

"Demetri?" He waited patiently for me to continue. "If love kept Carlisle's son from killing his blood singer, what's keeping Alec from killing me?" He shrugged, unable or not willing to provide any more thoughts with me, lest he also revealed their secrets. "Really? That's all you're going to give me?"

He sighed, "it's not my place." There was a lump in my throat. Clearly, our conversation had crossed some unspoken line. But it seemed innocent enough. They were simply answering my questions. Didn't I have a right to know something as big as my blood being a constant craving for someone I spent most of my time with?

Still, seeing the downtrodden looks and nervous reactions of my friends, who had nothing but the best intentions, upset me. I wanted to help them, but how could I when I didn't even know what they were afraid of. Now, I was lying to myself. The answer was too obvious to miss, no matter how much I wanted to ignore it. Heidi's voice rang in my ears; 'you're on your own. I want no part in pissing him off.' No way was I letting anything bad happen to Felix or Demetri, especially not for fear of retaliation from someone who could've prevented this whole situation in the first place.

I raised an eyebrow, placing a more mischievous tone to my voice. "Oh, but it is your place to tell me everything else?"

Demetri tried to hold back the small smile that slipped onto his face. With an equally mischievous song, he provided me with a "buona notte, dolcezza." He closed the door with a soft thud and I was alone.

Maybe Felix was right. I needed to start learning Italian. And Latin. Maybe even Romanian, for the heck of it. If I was a vampire, I'd have all the time in the world. I could learn every single language ever spoken.

The clanging of the clocktower, however, was a reminder of the real plan. Despite kidnapping me and wanting to change me into a soulless, invulnerable vampire, the Volturi coven had grown on me. But, I had something bigger than me to take care of. There was no time for friendships that couldn't last. This was about family — blood that wasn't a meal.

I was going to find my father.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all! I felt the need to note that I took affective neuroscience for psychology and I can maybe understand every five to seven words in a neuroscience case study. So, please forgive any neuro faux pas. Also, not gonna lie, I don't truly remember the plot of Twilight so curse me if I'm also wrong in my retelling.
> 
> Thank you for your support! Let me know what you think in the comments!


	11. Survival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Saffiya attempts her last escape and discovers pertinent information about her father's disappearance.

**I** hadn't noticed it at first.

It did not take long for me to change into the clothing I'd arrived in and throw my few possessions into my bag. I was ready within minutes after I'd been left to my own devices and I wanted to move quickly. I had no way to know how much longer I had before Alec's arrival. The vampire once again being forced to guard me while trying not to kill me. Which was apparently, inevitable.

A bitter part of me was glad that he was assigned to me for this next shift. If Alec was supposed to be guarding me, he would have to punish himself for my escape this time. Still, I wanted to leave before I had to see him. It would be easier that way.

However, I was held up by the presence of an unexpected item that had been placed on the vanity table. I stood admiring the intricacy of the black leather bound journal. A thin strap wrapped around and tied at the side to keep the pages tightly bound within it. Unlike notebooks at a commercial bookstore, everything about this one declared its history. It certainly owned up to its age and could have been classified as lightly used - if at all. My hand currently hovered above it, unsure of whether I should bring it with me or leave it behind.

_"Mate in four."_

_"I see it in three." Jane declared smugly, knocking down the white king before resetting the table. As much as Jane abhorred losing, her real enemy in chess was her own patience. She had long since become fed up with the amount of time it took me to make a single move, a default of my human mind. Instead, she began to play herself and I was content to simply watch as the afternoon passed us by._

_The giddy pride that surrounded her after every win made me smile. While we were decently matched, I rarely won. Somehow though, she seemed to find more pleasure in defeating herself. She wore a gloating grin every time she reset the board and it slowly shifted into a determined stare as another match began._

_This time, my attention had shifted from the chess board to the stain glass window behind Jane. It framed her almost perfectly and though each held their own form of beauty, the glory of the glass only served to reiterate the exquisiteness of Jane's natural self. The vampire factor disappeared and there she was, clear as day._

_Her features were defined by raised cheekbones, subtly decorated with a youthful amount of baby fat. It further projected the innocence that should accompany a young woman. Full lips set in an innate pout and a deep shade of pink, giving the impression that blood still flowed through her veins. Her hair was up in a favoured French twist and not a single hair was out of place. She blinked and scarlet flashed through long, thin eyelashes._

_"What are you doing?" She was staring at my hand, which was darting around the counter's edge of the table._

_I removed it before retracing the pattern. "I was drawing you."_

_"Into the table?"_

_I shrugged, "I don't have paper." It was a trick I had learned during the various art focused heists and schemes my father directed. I never really had paper on hand, so if I wanted to remember a detail of a painting I would physicalise it for myself. The tactic isn't unusual, equivalent to a piano player tapping their fingers as if playing the keys of their instrument._

_She tilted her head at me and I could almost see the wheels turning in her head as she processed this. "Shame." It was all she said before she returned to her game._

It was a gift. She had provided me with paper and it hurt me to acknowledge that now, I would never get the chance to actually paint her in person. My sentimentality was showing and it was wasting time. An instilled habit of traveling lightly was likely one of the only values both my life with my father and my life at the convent taught me. I pulled my hand away from the book, denying myself the frivolous present.

I changed my mind, quickly picking it up and holding it to my chest. I quickly moved to exit the room, trying to make up for lost time. I pulled the door open, only to be met with a fist preparing to knock on the wood.

Standing in my way to freedom once again, was Prosper.

My eyes widened and I faltered, taking in the military presence of the man. "Prosper."

He nodded. Right - strong and silent type. Or was he still afraid, as he had been in Felix's presence upon our first meeting. I remembered a gentleness in him when Felix had gone. We were alone now, but all traces of any similar emotions had been masked if they still existed.

Instead, he held himself with a rigid stillness indicative of the same uneasiness he'd had with the higher guard member. A reaction that I could only assume was a response to whatever Alec had done to him. Whatever it was, it seemed to haunt him, as if the violent vampire could turn a corner at any moment and repeat the damage done just because he was with me.

Perhaps I was dramatically projecting my own storyline. I couldn't help it. I had so little of the story that it was all I could do to not interrogate the vampire in the middle of the hallway. I had the right to embellish, especially as I noted a few short scratches marring Prosper's neck. It almost looked like a bite mark except that the deepest part of it dragged along the skin nearly an inch. The further away from the origin, the lighter it got. As if the offending weapon had been ripped away before it could cause any real damage.

I hadn't paid enough attention to know if it had been there before, but I thought vampires were invincible. It seemed impossible that he would even have a mark on him, especially not one so prominent and they clearly stood out if it was enough for me to notice. Perhaps it was the bite that had turned him - if classic vampire lore held any accuracy, though I was under the impression that vampires had fangs for that task.

He seemed to realize what I was looking at and quickly rearranged his cloak in an attempt to cover it. That wasn't suspicious at all. He didn't comment on the subject, only offering me a formal, "the Masters would like a word."

I swallowed, "again? I was just going to sleep..." He raised an eyebrow at my fully dressed form. I tried to casually hide myself behind the door a bit more. He didn't seem to buy it.

"I'll have to insist." He hesitated before adding, "you should leave your things in your room." Sheepishly, I returned the notebook to the vanity and slid my bag underneath it. When I reappeared in the doorway, he nodded in approval before leading me to our destination.

Yet again, my mission was put on hold. My daring escape would have to wait.

Instead, I spent the entire walk in mental distress. I wanted to apologise to him, for the trouble I had clearly caused him. For my selfishness. For Alec's rage. But I didn't know how and I could feel my mouth gaping open and closed like a fish as I came up with new ways to open the conversation. Yet, each one failed before it was even presented, none seeming to match the gravity I felt was owed to the situation.

I finally gave up once we turned the stairs and approached the throne room. The doors opened before we even reached them, the vampires on the other side both expecting our arrival and identifying our footsteps behind the massive barrier. We stepped across the threshold and I blinked to adjust to the change. The openness of the extravagant room was a stark contrast to the dark and empty halls.

Aro's familiar greeting echoed in the hall and my name bounced off the walls. "I do hope we caught you before your bedtime."

The infantile implication of his words bothered me. Not for the reason being that they were clearly older than me, but rather because I legitimately had the rights of a child. The rules were undeclared, but clearly not optional; Come when called, go where you're told, eat at a determined time, always have an escort.

I spotted three of my escorts sprinkled around the room. The absence of the other two let slip a sort of disappointment before I shoved it away. I'd done nothing but think and talk of the male half of the pair the entire day. Almost to the point of obsession and the disappointment faded into a squeamish nausea at this realization. I truly was like a child — a schoolgirl with nothing better to do than gossip and bicker with boys.

It was as immature as I'd ever been and I felt as if I'd mentally aged backwards. Still, there was a sort of exhilaration to it all. I'd never had the opportunity to be what one was at that age, a mix of naivety and a loss of innocence. I suppose most of that stage was influenced by friends. Which I'd certainly had, but I never formally attended school and if I did with my father, it was only for a short time.

The nuns had essentially taken care of my formal education. I would play with the children that came to mass at the nunnery every Sunday. But I'd always been a bit of an old soul and the personality didn't mesh with the others as we aged. Perhaps that was why Jane and I got along so well. All she'd ever had was her brother and while they were close, I wondered if she and I just happened to fill in a missing piece for the other.

My growing relationships within the Volturi appeared to be filling in the gaps of my social developments and education among a similar age group. Well, physical age group. And I think I was genuinely happy with them.

All three thrones were occupied by their constituents and Felix's royalty analogy won out again. For each man embodied an aura that could only be described as regal, in every sense of the word. Carlisle stood to the right of the thrones at the bottom of the stairs. His golden irises made him stick out like a sore thumb among the sea of red.

The guard hovered in designated spots against the walls. Many with cloaks and a far more formal wear than most donned around the castle when off duty. Their presence was solid, an undeniable force of power but as bleak as a well. I scanned over the group until something peculiar caught my attention.

In the far back corner of the room, a hunched form was covered by a coat or a blanket. It was only slightly hidden behind and in-between two members of the lower guard. It must have been alive, as the thing was making only the smallest movement, rocking back and forth on the hard floor. I tried to determine the nature of the figure, however, my attention was forced away from whatever it was to give the kings the respect they so deserved.

Aro was tapping the tips of his fingers together, waiting for my reply. "What's going on?"

Caius' raspy voice injected itself into the air, "you will witness your first trial under our laws." The vagueness of his statement was purposeful and he watched, waiting for me to squirm and question him further. I wondered if the so called 'trial' had anything to do with the creature across the room. Before I could think of a more specific question, Aro broke his false brother's icy intent.

"Exciting, is it not?" I nodded, to assuage his desire for something more than I could give him.

"But first —"

The doors through which Prosper and I had entered opened once more with a distinctive groan. "Wonderful timing, Jane. Alec." I bit my lip in an outward attempt to gain control of my nerve as Aro welcomed his favourite members of the guard. In the corner of my eye, the twins took their place on the left hand of the throne. Jane's face was unreadable, yet her brother was glowering at Prosper.

_He's never going near you again._

Beside me, Prosper took a strategic, single step away from me. He didn't leave to join the other guard members around the room, however, and Aro didn't dismiss him.

"As I was saying, there is a matter we wished to discuss first. As you know, we have yet to decide the date you will officially become one of us." My eyes narrowed. Aro moved to the edge of his seat, a curious sprinkle of delight in his eyes. "How much do you know about the transformation?"

He spoke about it as if it were more than what Dracula and other stories had suggested. Not that I knew much vampire lore beyond the scope of factual events in history, but I had assumptions as one does. "It hasn't exactly been at the forefront of my mind."

His head swayed up and down in consideration. "When you shared your theory with us this morning, our dear friend, Carlisle, thought of an additional factor that we had yet to consider." He cut off and I raised my eyebrows, waiting for him to continue.

Instead, Carlisle stepped forward, hands folded behind his back. "Your theory may have more weight than you originally entertained."

I tried to keep my tone from being too rude as I interrupted him, "sorry, but, exactly how familiar are you with my disorder?"

"I've been studying medicine for a very long time, though I must admit I have never personally met anyone like you." A vampire doctor. A doctor vampire. The very concept was a contradiction in itself. One took lives, the other saved them. I had so many more questions, but the one with the loudest voice repeated in my head - was this the reason his eyes were gold?

"It is Carlisle's belief that the transformation process may not be as simple with you, as it would for any other human."

I frowned, finding myself automatically relying on Carlisle's medicinal title for my information rather than Aro's. "Why is that?"

Carlisle explained, "the change lasts for at least three days and is especially arduous. The minute the venom enters the veins, an individual is overcome with excruciating pain." He kept his voice even, as if he predicted his words would instigate an adverse reaction. As his eyes flickered to my right, I realized that it was not only my reaction he was concerned about. "Not everyone survives it."

I could feel all the eyes of the room on me. But I stayed locked on Carlisle, following his speech but only picking up on the words that seemed most important. I struggled to both listen and process what he was saying, but I could feel its weight and I think I already knew.

"With your unique condition, I suspect that if you were to undergo the change with your current inexperience with pain...you would not survive the transformation."

The fullness of the room became apparent to me then. It was odd to be having a conversation of such a sensitive nature in front of so many people. A conversation for three, being observed as if we were a play. Though I felt no need to put on a performance, I did wish for a blanket, or a hoodie. Something that would shield me from all the elements of the world as they picked on me with the arrogance of a bully. The only sound in the room came from the corner, where the large ball seemed to be sniffling. It sounded pitiful.

"I would die." My eyes flickered to Alec without prompt. His face was stoic, but his eyes caught mine and for the first time, he didn't immediately retreat to emptiness. Yet, I almost wished they had. I had never imagined the boy could ever appear so utterly helpless and it wasn't an expression he seemed to have the ability to hide. The suddenness of the news seemed to have crashed into him, disarming the protections he had placed around himself.

Was it possible that the near guarantee of my death scared him? Was it possible that he cared whether I lived or died? The schoolgirl in me shied away from the idea, not wanting to get her hopes up. Hope that I refused to acknowledge.

Jane grabbed his hand and I tore my eyes away.

"It is possible." Carlisle warned and I was sure he would rather be anyone else in that moment...A vampire doctor. Wow.

"I assume this doesn't change your minds, though." I eyed Aro, "does it?"

For such an archaic man, Aro didn't seem to get bitter sarcasm. Perhaps he'd chosen to ignore it, but it was most likely that he'd convinced himself I had no qualms with the life he was forcing on me. "Your transition will be delayed by this, I fear. Though Carlisle believes he may have a solution to remedy this inconvenience."

I allowed the men to continue feeding me information as Carlisle stepped in to provide the explanation to Aro's comments. "The actual feeling of the pain during the transformation is not dissimilar to Jane's gift. If you were to be exposed to it in structured sessions, gradually introducing incremental doses, your chances of survival may be much greater."

I waited for an outraged response to expel itself from me at this news. They seemed to be oblivious to the fact that the other option was for me to live my life and not immediately die. Apparently, they wanted me to be a vampire so badly, that they were willing to risk my life without any guarantee. To design a step by step plan based on one doctor's theory that had been based on my own delusional, unsubstantiated idea.

I should be upset that I was expected to simply accept my fate and allow them to subject me to the most painful experience a vampire ever encounters not once, but several times on purpose. I should be livid that this was unnecessary torture, all in preparation for an event that did not need to happen. And I was. However, there was one detail of it all that I had little to no quarrel with.

Jane's gift.

I glanced over to the shorter twin, who had her entire focus on her leader. Carlisle picked up on this and added, "If you were both willing, that is."

"Master." Her voice joined our play, her role being one of uncertainty. Aro nodded and she made her way up the three stairs to offer him her hand. His head tilted down for a moment as she shared her thoughts.

He emerged from her mind, his eyes flickering to Alec before giving one curt shake of his head. "For now, there is no other way, dear one." The term of endearment surprised me, but there was no acknowledgement of the tenderness in his response from Jane. Instead, she retreated back to her position. This time, she kept her hands to herself and her posture grew even more stoic than before.

Aro seemed to pay her response no mind either, because he clapped his hands together gleefully. "Excellent! Then, I suppose there is only one final matter for this evening." His cloak spun around him as he returned to his chair. The retreat puzzled me, before Caius rose with the intensity of a Bond villain. As if this was their cue, two guard members dragged the whimpering form in the corner to collapse on the marble floor between me and the masters. At a painfully human pace, the form lifted its head.

Almost simultaneously, my heart seemed to shatter and enter what felt like what I assumed was cardiac arrest.

_The door to the pub blew open with a gust of wind. A short, round man hobbled in, his left hand clutching a rather shiny cane. He sat at the bar and rested the cane on his lap, raising his right hand to get the bartender's attention._

Caius seemed pleased by my response. "You are familiar with Mr. Tima, are you not, girl?" I couldn't answer, my eyes taking in the sight of my father's friend. The confident, disgruntled, demeanour that the man had carried in the comfort of his friendly neighborhood pub had vanished. His eyes glistened, but not with tears - with fear. I'd never seen fear in someone's eyes as telling and haunting as it was in his. He was absolutely terrified.

"Aro —" Aro held up a hand to silence his friend. Carlisle hesitated, but stepped back, respecting the orders of the man in power.

"A short time ago, Victor Tima," Caius circled the man who cowered away at any angle he possibly could. None of which provided the distance he desired from the relic. "The Volturi allowed you to keep your life, provided you continued to procure a unique array of art for our collection and did not interfere in our affairs again. Was this not our agreement?"

I'd never heard Caius speak more than a few words at once. The sound his voice produced slithered through the air like a snake and I realized that his words weren't for volume, so much as they were intended to prolong the impending doom his victims were experiencing. We were his victims and he was relishing in our fear before he would deliver the first strike.

A whimpered, "yes."

"If not for Saffiya, you may have continued to exist under this gracious condition." Ouch. I should have rushed to the man's side, shown an ounce of humanity that was absent from the situation. But I was frozen. Caius was right, this was all my fault. They must have found out he was helping me. That I was to meet with him.

Aro. My mind flashed to the ignorance I had shown in the last few days. How easily I'd handed over my every thought to the vampire, without even a second thought. How could I have been so foolish? I closed my eyes, my head falling to the side as I drowned myself in shame and self-pity.

Caius took pleasure in my growing stress, continuing with his torment. "Last confession, human. Tell the girl the truth about her father." Victor was slow to answer him and the man's eyes didn't leave me. "Speak, human," Caius hissed.

The old man croaked, "your dad...he died."

I retreated from the claim, unwilling to give it any credence. Caius had to be making him say this. It made no sense. He'd asked me to meet him, which meant he had to have some information on my father. I reviewed his words from that night...' _I'll get you out of here._ ' "But, I thought..." It dawned on me then that he never had any information to find my father. Getting me out of the castle wasn't about my father. He had been trying to save me from the monsters. _'Careful kid, boys like him never have good intentions.'_

Victor's voice never lost its gruffness, "he was on his way to meet me, but the story was he got nabbed by Interpol." The story. Inside secrets passed through criminals to keep up on the current happenings of the crime world. Straight from the horse's mouth. Like a game of telephone, the messages could easily be distorted. But there wasn't much room for conspiracy with something as finite as 'dead'. "He tried to run, but..."

Running when cornered was messy. Slipping under the local cops' noses added to your resume and kept you off the grid. While reinventing one's identity was a nuisance, it was better than escaping custody. Which, when prepared for could be smoothly coordinated, but a con man's credibility favoured an invisible record over a flawless prison escape.

My head began to shake of its own accord. My breathing was rough as I insisted, "my dad would never run."

He was never without a backup plan. And there was always a backup plan for the backup plan. No room for error. It was our promise, so that we would never lose each other. I'd seen him caught up with the police. He could charm his way out of any situation and if he couldn't he'd figure out an escape before they could contact any international authority to transfer custody to.

My view of my father, even now, painted him as invincible. It is an idea that we all have of our parents. Until the moment we realise that they're not superheroes. They were just our parents, only human. Flawed and human. My father was just my father. He was only human. But humans...humans can get caught. This was that moment for me, when I had to wake up to the reality that my father was not all powerful. He was dead.

Caius waved a hand, as if suddenly bored with my grief, and returned to his seat. "Prosper."

"Wait - no!"

With an exasperated sigh, Caius instructed, "control your human, boy."

I lunged forward, but my hands were secured behind my back in an instant. I struggled against my captor but the grip held firm, preventing me from interfering in the Volturi's sentencing.

Caius jeered mockingly at me, "if only you did as you were told."

Victor cast one last sorrowful look at me, "I'm sorry, kid."

Without so much as an acknowledgement of my protest, Prosper obeyed his unspoken order. He flashed to Victor's side and lifted him up by his shoulder. The plump man, dangling and before he could react, the vampire sunk its teeth into his neck. A tug on my hands tried to turn me away from the horror, but I stood my ground. I wanted my father's friend to see something not entirely evil before he died.

Though I didn't see myself as 'not evil' right now. And I think as much as I tried to convince myself my observation was for him, it was not. I was punishing, forcing myself to face my greed and the result of my actions. I watched as each sip the vampire seemed to take encouraged the older man's body to fade until his body slid back down to the floor. Lifeless. Gone. Taking all hope of finding my father with him.

I slowly tore my eyes away. Each of the three kings were watching me, but Carlisle had hung his head to the floor.

My knees wobbled and I relied on the person behind me to support my weight. I was extremely grateful for their presence. The hands had released mine, one settled on my hip and the other at the middle of my back to support me without it being obvious to the leaders before us. He had become more of a protector than a captor.

The room was waiting for my reaction and I didn't want to give them — especially not Caius — the satisfaction of a breakdown from me. This was a very different side to the Volturi than the one I'd been exposed to. Yes, I'd seen glimpses, heard the screams down the hall, and Felix had insisted but Aro had always given me the show. And I'd been too distracted by foolish escapades to defend myself against it.

I was messing with a world I did not understand. One in which I had no control. To have believed I could have escaped was arrogant and it seemed everyone but I, had paid dearly for the mistake. My future had been decided and though I was loathe to even entertain the thought, I had to consider giving up and giving in.

Victor's body still lied on the floor in front of us.

I had to choose my next words carefully.

"I'm tired."

Caius' lips twisted up in satisfaction at my demure attitude. I could feel the tension exit out of my protector behind me and a squeeze on my hip brought another wave of comfort.

"You are dismissed." I had hardly turned an inch when Aro's voice shattered the world once again.

"Saffiya." His eyes were dark, power seeping out of his every pore, "you would do well to accept your fate. The Volturi do not give second chances."

Carlisle was watching me sadly from the sidelines, but he didn't dare intervene. There was nothing he could do. None of the guard were looking at me. Their faces all entirely empty, mindless. Jane was standing alone now, eyeing my protector carefully. My protector. Alec.

Alec began to lead me from the room, when Marcus contributed his first sentence of the conversation. In a hollow tone, he offered, "our condolences for your father."

"And his friend," Caius hissed. My head moved from the other men to the most sadistic of the three kings. A cruel grin hailed his face. He was baiting me. It worked.

Fire whipped through my veins, but Marcus must have seen it because he acted before I could.

"Alec."

With that, I was swept into the air and carried away from the scene of the crime.


	12. Here

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Alec and Saffiya confront each other.

**W** ithin a single breath, I was being placed on my own two feet in my room. The side of my bed pressed against the back of my thighs as I let myself sit back on it. I found myself staring directly at the door across from me.

My mind felt empty. Nothing crossed the front of my consciousness and I wasn't actually thinking anything. Just existing. I was breathing. My heartbeat felt entirely too slow for all that had just happened. I didn't feel numb. In fact, it was the opposite. I felt everything and it spoiled my body from my throat and down my chest. But no words or memories flashed to take control of a narrative. It was all just...there. One thing was for sure, I certainly wasn't tired.

Movement to my left caused me to blink, the torso of my protector interrupted my staring contest as he stepped right in front of me. His cape briefly tickled my calves as he repositioned himself, but my response was minimal.

"Saffiya." My name passing through his lips caught my attention, and I realized he'd been asking me questions all this time. Still, I couldn't quite find the energy to acknowledge his efforts. When even my name didn't garner a response for him, he knelt in front of me and his hands automatically placed themselves on my knees. He repeated his question, "do you want to talk about it?" My eyes flickered to his and my face must have been very clear because he sighed. I dropped my head away from him.

After a moment, his voice was soft, favouring a new tactic. "Tesoro." A hand left my knee to brush my hair from my face. It was tender and patient and I closed my eyes at the relief his touch brought to me. "Tell me what you need."

His thumb ran back and forth over my knee, the weight of his hand seemed to ground me more than the actual floor below us.

"I'd like to be alone right now."

He shook his head, "I can not do that." Did he really ask just so he could do the exact opposite of what I asked for? I couldn't catch a break with this guy.

"I'd like to be alone - please." Manners didn't seem to make a difference.

"No." As if to further his point, he moved to my side and fell back onto the bed. Throwing one arm under his head, he winked at me before he fixated his gaze on the canopy above us. I stared at him incredulously and it was the first emotion to stand out for me since we'd left the throne room. And it made me feel...better? As if the normality of his behaviour was somehow consoling in light of my loss.

So I said nothing. I'm not sure how long we stayed there. Empty minds and a single beating heart. At one point, Alec had begun to twirl the ends of my hair that hung messily down my back. I closed my eyes as a burst of light spread through my infected veins and I found comfort in the subtle reminder that I was not alone. Whether that was his intent or not, he continued the behaviour as innocently as a bug.

Now sitting on the edge of the bed, I must have changed positions at least three times. Alec, however, didn't move an inch except to return his hand to play with my curls after I'd settled from each transition. It seemed to be a reflex, an absentminded detail meant to comfort me. Like when you were consoling a crying friend and hesitated to change the pattern or speed in which you patted their back. Like you worried that the slightest change would set them off again.

That was me. A ticking time bomb. And he knew it. Not only was I reeling from recent events but the memories from our tête-à-tête the previous morning weighed heavily in the air between us. So much had happened since then. It seemed impossible to keep track of it all. However, one thing was clear to me. Alec had a lot of explaining to do.

It seemed that I was not the only one with heavy questions.

"In the library," he started, his voice gruff. "You were attempting to find evidence to convince Jane to hurt you."

I corrected him, "to use her gift."

"Never again." He repeated himself and the unsupported finality in his statement was practically begging me to challenge him.

"You heard Carlisle—"

He wasted no time jumping back in, a dismissive respect claiming, "I do not care what the Cullen said. It isn't going to happen." It was the protest of a child. Empty and insignificant to all outside forces with the real power. It made no sense as to why he cared whether Jane used her gift on me or not, let alone if it worked. Perhaps he was simply trying to protect Jane's image or even an innocence to his sister that only he could see.

Either way, I turned around to address him. His jaw was clenched and he was glaring at the fabric above my bed. The tenseness of his body didn't seem to translate to his fingers, which were still twirling the ends of my hair in oblivious zen. "That's not your decision to make."

Alec snarled and I actually jumped, "like hell it isn't."

"I'd have thought you'd have more faith in your sister."

I was receiving some serious side eye as he drawled, "Jane is not the impetuous variable."

I crossed my arms and stood, throwing my weight to one hip. His hand fell from my back and I'd forgotten it was even there.

He frowned and sat up to match my height. Our eyes met, and with him sitting, we were now on the same level. I attempted to control my facial expression, to keep it from giving any indication that he was increasingly pushing my buttons. Biting my lip, I retreated to the bathroom door and paused just outside of it.

"You should leave. Or you're not going to like what I have to say to you when I come back." He said nothing, so I stepped inside the in-suite bathroom, closing and locking the door behind me.

In the loneliness behind the closed door, reality hit me tenfold. The second I turned the lock, I pushed away from the door too quickly. I nearly tripped over nothing and my hands just barely caught the sink, gripping the edge to keep me from collapsing on the tile floor out of sheer emotional exhaustion. I could feel a wall somewhere inside of me begin to chip away at itself.

A subtle twitching in my hand spread throughout my entire body and I began to shake. No. I tightened my hold on the counter. While I would take the time to respectfully tend to a guilt and sadness for the life of a man I'd hardly known, I refused to mourn. This was merely a setback, not an excuse to give up. Not a reason to give up. Yes, I'd lost my only, last, and strongest lead in the case of my missing father, but I'd survived on hope with much less. This was a minor complication. It didn't mean anything. This was far from over with, six feet under or not.

Shit. I tore one hand from the sink to cover my mouth as I struggled to contain the cries that demanded a release from their prison. Their echoing rally ready to make an appearance before tears even had the chance to form. They weren't far behind and informed me of such as the silver faucet in my line of vision began to cloud over. I quickly shook my head from side to side in an attempt to force the physiological reaction away.

I caught sight of my eyes in the mirror and they became my focal point. Staring into my own eyes, I pulled myself from inside my head and breathed i and ou — hiccup.

Close enough.

I had to find some hope. Convince myself that I would find a new lead and I would figure out the full story of what had happened to my father. I had to remain positive. All I had to do was make it out of here alive.

This was a plan that would suggest I had no intentions of antagonising the one vampire who wanted to kill me and struggled to not do so every time he saw me. Only, I did intend to do so. I definitely did.

Apparently, he wasn't quite done with me either because Alec was still in my room. Despite the tensions we both still carried from the throne room, we still had dimes to split with each other.

He'd laid back down on the bed, his eyes now closed. He looked peaceful, as if lost in a dream. He barely acknowledged my entrance, though his body tensed as the bathroom door swung closed. The brief wind it created softly waving past me.

After the minute I'd taken for myself, I was well aware that I was in no state to engage in any form of conversation with him. The brewing argument I'd cut off mere minutes ago was proof that nothing productive could come from any continued debate. The contents of which were still fresh in my mind and just the thought of his audacity was enough to reinstall my frustration with him.

Because even if Demetri and Felix had asked me to be patient with him, the reality was that patience was a false virtue. Based on our scuffle before I'd left, he had some issues with my choices. Unfortunately for him, I did too. And I wasn't going to let him scare me off of them like he'd gotten everyone else to do. I had questions and I expected answers.

The only question — which one of us would break first.

"You lied to me."

He barely lifted his head. "Did I?" He drawled lazily, his accent peaking at the end of his question with an annoying, cocky timbre.

"Yes."

"Would you care to be more specific?" The question upset me and he absolutely knew it because he did sit up this time, watching for my reaction.

"Prosper." His eyes flashed. "You said you didn't hurt him."

The accusation immediately put him on the defensive. "The man made your father's friend into a midnight snack and you care that I may have damaged his ego?" I physically had to shrug off the harsh reminder to stay focused on my goal.

"That wasn't a no."

He snarled, "his mistake could've gotten you killed." Prosper played a minor role in my escape, it was hardly his fault. It was an overzealous statement. While it was dramatic, his insistence almost convinced me and I believe that he was at least under the impression that this had been the most likely scenario - 100%. "It is my job to protect you—"

I rolled my eyes, "I have plenty of guards."

"That is different." He shot me a look that should've shut me up and it would've. If I cared to trim his temper, which wasn't exactly a factor I even attempted to consider. Not that any of this had been meditated over, neither of us were speaking from the sanest places right now.

"How?"

"It just is!"

This was the moment I expected my brain to grow cloudy, as hazy as it always did when Alec drove me insane. Only this time, it didn't. This time, I was ready. "That's not good enough."

"Leave it be, Saffiya."

I crossed my arms over my chest, considering the risk if I did not, in fact, leave it alone. "No." He was leaning over the desk, hands clenched around the edges of its chair. Unnecessary breaths seemed to be delivered from his chest as I watched his body tense. "I think I deserve —"

"Damn it - will you do as you are told!"

His hand collided with the hard wood of the desk. The sound resonated around the room, bouncing from one wall to the next and lingering in the air. The table under his hand wobbled in response before stilling.

His eyes widened as he raised his head to me. Across the room, I had grabbed my chest in surprise, but I hadn't flinched away. Given no outward sign that I was afraid of him because I wasn't. And my curiosity hadn't faded, but rather something else had joined it. Something I couldn't quite place. I was just watching him and my gaze was nothing unique in my opinion. But whatever he saw on my face made Alec's entire body shift dramatically. He reached a hand towards me, but I raised one in response as if to tell him to stay back. It was as if I'd stung him, "Saffiya —"

Jane had been adamant that Alec would never hit me, never hurt me. And his surprise at his own actions matched my own. It had me wondering what exactly it was that we brought out in each other. And why. And just how bad would it get before we looked in the mirror and didn't recognise who we saw. It was dangerous and would continue to be if left unchecked, that much was clear.

Still. It was exhilarating — like nothing I had ever experienced before but I couldn't name it. Couldn't truly describe how even his name made me feel as if I could run a marathon. When he was near me, I felt sick to my stomach with the flittering of the butterflies inside me. Fear of what he'd do. Yet, in this moment, I entertained the possibility that fear was the wrong diagnosis. Only I couldn't figure any other possible answers. And while this was all running through my mind, another horrifying realization brought me back.

"Felix said it took Santiago ages to 'put him back together."

"If Prosper," he spit the name through his teeth, as if the word itself brought poison and misfortune to rest on his tongue. "Did as he was told—"

"Which would mean that he was ripped," I choked, "apart."

Alec answered my question resentfully, enunciating each word. He'd lost all care and caution to protect my mind from whatever horrors he was previously attempting to conceal from me. Anger misleading his good intentions and burn down the walls he'd built. His voice was coated with an ambrosial flavour, as if he derived pleasure from the bestial resolution, "he is lucky I didn't rip his throat out."

The marks on Prosper's neck. The ones that looked like he'd been bitten into.

"Oh my god." The exclamation flew from my mouth before I could cover it, my hand landing across my lips mere milliseconds after.

My knees buckled and I dropped, landing haphazardly on the floor. All at once, Alec appeared at my side, checking for damage on my body from the fall as if it were second nature to him. All signs of anger gone without a second thought.

There is was again. Emotion that he couldn't hide. That he was too distracted to catch and force it back down to hide it from the world. There was no immediate recovery, return to emptiness, and then a harsh reminder of my unimportance. No, this time, his eyebrows were furrowed and his lips tight. His eyes glittered with concern. His movements unfettered, driven by moment to moment thoughts instead of through a filtered dedication to being the evil guard.

He was vulnerable.

It was the most human I had ever seen him.

"Saffiya? What's wrong? What happened?" His hand went to the back of my neck, to provide a kind of balance. It reminded me that he was not human. That my neck was easy access to my blood. That a throat could be ripped out to kill even a vampire. That he was willing to do that to someone who he perceived had risked my life. I flinched at his touch.

"Why am I still alive?" He wasn't expecting that and even if he were going to respond, I didn't give him a chance.

"I just watched a man get the life sucked out of him by a vampire. A vampire. And the whole time, I was blaming myself. But it's not my fault — it's yours."

He frowned, refusing the responsibility with a wounded expression. "You shouldn't have tried to leave."

"Oh, I'm sorry. Did I hurt your feelings? Trying to flee my kidnappers?" I pushed myself from the ground and away from him. "You understand that that's what you're doing right? It's a crime, maybe you've heard of it? Its illegal."

Alec copied my movement, standing to rise above me so I had to glare up at him. The dark had returned, but there was something behind it. A hint that he was portraying only false emotions, that he still had a reason to hide the real ones. "Would you prefer I left you to the mercy of those dogs?"

I laughed mockingly, automatically picking up the falsities of the facade he so quickly restored. "Right. So, you kill 3 people and I should be down on my knees, thanking the gods that you didn't kill me in a dark alley. Get over yourself."

He growled in warning, but I didn't care.

"My entire world was flipped upside down in the span of a single day and you can't find the decency to treat me like a human being. Or even pass off a half-hearted 'sorry I destroyed your future.'"

I reached out to shove him away from me, but he didn't so much as falter. I balled my hand up into a fist, pushing against his chest again and again as if I were knocking down a door. "What do you want from me?" He let me continue to hit him, without pause and lacking reason. Eventually, he caught one of my wrists when I started increasing the weight behind each hit — to keep me from shattering my hand against the invincible marble of his chest.

I pulled against him, but he refused to budge. I took my other hand and weakly wound it up for a punch aimed at his face. He caught it, and the momentum forced me closer to him. "You want everyone to be so afraid of you. They see the fury, the power of a god. I see a coward."

He clenched his jaw, a scowl darkening his features. I struggled to reclaim it my wrists but he held them in place between us. "Get off of me." He made no such moves to do so and I may have overreacted because I began to thrash in his hold.

A guttural growl came from his chest and he pulled me closer to him. "That is enough!" I froze once again, trapped as I watched an inky pool of black begin to devour the cardinal that had called it home.

"Breathe." He commanded.

The word mimicked a snap, as if releasing me from a hallucination and I immediately began gasping to fill my deeply deprived lungs of their nutrition. It was then that I ascertained another explanation behind his strong arming. A factor that he never had to account for before me: Air.

"One mistake cannot go unpunished. Because the next time could be the last." He loosened his grip on my wrists, but still held them close. As if the proximity would assist in his defence. "So, if Prosper gets a hundred more minuscule scars, so be it. You do not have to like it, but, I am only trying to keep you safe."

I bit my bottom lip, failing miserably as I attempted to keep it from visibly quaking. But with a sharp intake of breath, I lost the battle. "I hate you." I hissed at him. I began to adamantly shake my head back and forth, unsure of what exactly I was supposed to be feeling right now. How was he so calm? He'd hardly tolerated lesser comments from me before and now that I'd thrown the lot in he just didn't seem to factor it in to anything he was doing. Drops of water began racing from my eyes to pool at the corners of my lips, to fall from my chin and cover my cheeks in its salty liquid. "And I will spend the next thousand years of my life hating you."

I made the fatal mistake of meeting his eyes, as I'd done so often before.

I waited for another harsh word. A warning that I'd gone too far. His eyes were still dark as midnight and I almost expected him to just drain me dry then and there. Instead, he did the unthinkable. The implausible. The unexplainable.

He gently moved my hands to rest on the back of either side of his hips and pulled me into his chest. He wrapped his arms around me and kept me there as I continued to cry. Without thinking, I tightened my grip around his waist, clinging to him with what was left of a quickly diminishing energy level. I collapsed into the embrace. My body was still shaking with tears that had barely begun and with a mind so exhausted it was empty of any conscious efforts to genuinely control my thoughts.

The emotions I'd pushed away in the bathroom came spilling out and Alec only tightened his hold on me. My thoughts were replaced with senses. His smell encompassed me in a buzz of relief and I could feel the tension begin to drain from my shoulders. A slow, careful rise and fall of his chest was empty of a heartbeat, but the subtle motions lulled me into breathing through another wave of sobs. Firm arms held me to him and I didn't think he would have ever let me go. I don't think I ever wanted him to.

He pressed his lips to the top of my head and muttered something that sounded an awful lot like, "so long as you're with me."

But that didn't make any sense. Did it?


	13. Kryptonite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which distance makes the heart grow fonder. In which Saffiya bonds with her friends and grieves for her father.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone reading. Your comments are so so sweet so this post is for all of you ;*

" **B** alloons?"

Felix nodded eagerly, hauling over a medium sized cardboard box from the depths of his closet. I waited patiently on his couch with my legs crossed. Demetri sat on the floor in front of the couch and next to Felix's briefly abandoned spot. A joypad, as the men had been suggestively referring to the video game controllers as all day, hung loosely in his left hand. The pad of his thumb tapped impatiently on the A button. Though his focus was as equally dedicated as Felix's regarding the purpose of the box.

"Genius, isn't it?"

I tilted my head and looked between the two of them. "What exactly is your plan—?"

"Never mind that." Felix dropped the box beside me on the couch. Growing all the more curious, I reached in and clasped a handful of latex party balloons. "First, you blow up these balloons and we play video games."

My jaw dropped and with a whine, "how come I have to do all the work?"

He waved me off, sitting back down with his controller. "We all have to pay our dues."

"Fiya," Demetri kept the game paused and rhythmically patted my knee. The nickname they had adopted had grown on me. While I rather liked my full name, this was the first time I would receive a real nickname from actual friends. "Dear, sweet, Fiya. It just so happens that Felix and I are the kings of the prank world. And we are willing to train you in the sacred art of practical jokes. This is truly a once in a lifetime opportunity."

Felix was nodding urgently on my other side, feeding me a theatrical explanation of the so-called, 'coursework'. "You will study the most exalted pranks of them all. The art of the prank requires stealth, creativity and at times, even a dash of Judas."

I squinted at the duo's natural flare for dramatics. Forget video games. They should be putting on full scale Shakespearean productions. They could rewrite each play for vampires. It would definitely put a new spin on Romeo and Juliet...

"But first. You have to blow up like 50 of these things."

Unfortunately for them, embellishments and persuasion had been ingrained in me by a professional con man. I wasn't eating any of their baloney. "No way. Your instructions alone could be a prank." If I was going to individually blow up 50 balloons, it had better be for a real prank. If they ditched the latter and only pranked me, I'd accuse them of being false kings for such a bland and uncreative approach.

Felix wiped a fake tear from his eyes. "She's a natural! So intelligent." He threw a sassy smirk to Demetri. "She gets that from me."

Four days. I had received four days alone to grieve before Felix and Demetri had kidnapped me from my room to watch them engage in various activities - mainly, video games. It became the regular routine in order to keep me from wallowing alone in my room. They meant well, declaring that distraction was the best medicine. I'm not sure that the jingle held quite as much weight with me. Mainly due to the fact that it didn't seem like the healthiest coping strategy, but they insisted so I sucked it up.

In the days that followed, we found a pattern of hopping between different hobbies. As odd as the approach had seemed at the beginning, I found stability in the developing schedule. There were a few sparring sessions where Demetri got his butt kicked and we played a rather heated game of Monopoly. For the most part, however, we were usually holed up in Felix's room as they switched off between playing several games where the goal was to tally the most kills in one war zone or another and another game, something called Mario Kart.

Their rambunctious behaviour had been turned up about three levels from its standard. Eventually, somewhere between the stupid jokes and witty banter, I started laughing again.

The guilt that I felt from being able to tell jokes and smile only a few days after learning of my father's passing, wasn't as overwhelming as I expected it to be. It was possible that I'd numbed myself to the idea, relying on the memory of my father rather than the reality. The memories from my childhood had been what was driving me for the last five years. They were flashbacks from a child's perspective, romanticised and influential but subject to change as I grew older.

One of the strongest was of a silly little excursion to find the best gelato in Italy was once an imaginative quest, such a perspective that had been destroyed by the disillusionment of reality. A homeschool field trip to a museum was a cover for a reconnaissance trip to survey the building and time the changing of the guards. As I got older, our grand adventures became more targeted and less fantastically oriented. A memory that had been forcing itself through my mind the last few days made my stomach twist in knots. Another once happy memory, impeded by the recollection of the details. Details that changed the whole story. It was my memory of the first time I purposefully broke my wrist for the overall success of a job we were working. I'd done it of my own volition and he bought me an ice cream cone. I wonder now what he thought we were celebrating.

I was a good little soldier back then. Perhaps that was what Aro saw in me. I was young enough to be moulded, directed and inspired. Maybe he believed that if he gained my loyalty, a perfect soldier would be his reward. It wouldn't be a half bad plan. Especially since, even after his show of cruelty the other day, I found myself unable to hold any sustainable form of ill-will to any of the three masters. For they had given me something I craved more than my own life. Something I had been unable to discover on my own and that no one else was willing to help me uncover.

The leaders of the Volturi had given me answers. Their methods were questionable, sure. But the value of the information to me, outweighed even a man's life. Apparently, my primary loyalties didn't abide by an ethical code in life or death situations. Perhaps Aro knew this.

Demetri rolled his eyes at Felix and gave me a charming smile. I eyed him suspiciously. After all, this conversation had begun with a simple question presented in his charismatic voice and now, all of a sudden I was being tasked with giving up my air supply to an army of rainbow latex balls. "You're one of us now. You're on balloons cause the next steps require a more vampiric quality." He winked. "All in, baby."

"Yes!" Felix declared, pointing his finger towards the ceiling in a matter of fact way. "We must redeem ourselves. For you see," He dropped his head, lifting his hand across his heart and an arm reaching for air as if he were delivering a rousing soliloquy. Bingo for melodramatic storytelling. "Our last prank was extravagant. It would have been a marvel! A new take on a complete classic."

I looked to Demetri and he offered the actual background. "We put saran wrap over everyone's doors so they'd walk into it. Including the throne rooms."

"But alas!" I laughed in both surprise and amusement at Felix's sudden exclamation and shoved his shoulder. He humoured me and let his shoulder tilt as if I actually had the strength to make him move a muscle. He did however, finally drop the storytelling act, admitting plainly. "It totally backfired cause, you know, extreme vampire senses. Everyone could see it." I shook my head in pity and amusement. This could be really fun.

I bit the inside of my cheek and gave in. "Fine. I'll blow up the stupid balloons." They fist bumped and immediately turned away from me, their focus now returning to their electronics. I picked a blue balloon and began my long journey into balloon world.

Watching them play was surprisingly entertaining, and blowing up the balloons was an excellently mindless task to do at the same time. Without much space beside nor in front of me, I'd been tossing finished balloons in different directions around the room. Felix clearly hadn't accounted for the space the balloons would take once they were full of air. So, I had fun making his room a mess of random traveling balloons.

As the guys swapped out their current game for another, I voiced a question that had been picking at me for a few days. "On the topic of your vampire abilities, just how invincible are you guys?" I finished off another balloon and threw it over my shoulder.

Demetri shrugged, "err...completely?"

"Well, I mean, technically nothing is invincible. Any comic book will prove that."

He tittered, doubling down. "No, we're pretty much invulnerable."

Felix let out a barking laugh, chanting "Yeah! Superman who?", while strategically weaving his body and his controller with his avatar's movements on the screen.

Adding another balloon to the room, I proposed "what if you were to get lemon juice in your eye."

Felix snorted, "what?"

"Lemon juice." I said simply. "It's supposed to sting."

"Doubt it." I could see the arrogant grin in the reflection of the television.

I tapped my chin, a thought occurring to me that may or may not have been inspired by our last conversation. "We should try it."

Felix snorted again, "no."

I crossed my arms mockingly and even though he couldn't see me behind him, the playful taunt was clear. "What are you, scared?"

Demetri chipped in giddily as Felix's character walked into a room full of unfriendlies. "Sounds scared to me."

The mere suggestion was enough to knock him off his game, as he turned to both of us and shouted indignantly, "I am not!" Almost simultaneously, his screen filled with blood and Demetri cackled in glory as the game declared him the winner. "Damn it!"

I doubled over in a fit of giggles, almost missing the high five Demetri offered me. Felix was frowning, pointing a finger of blame in my direction. "Evil." I stuck my tongue out at him and he responded in kind.

"Speaking of evil," Demetri turned on me, winking at Felix this time. The game was momentarily forgotten as Felix caught on to whatever Demetri was about to suggest. They both faced me with goofy looks. "How _is_ Alec?"

After the night Alec had spent consoling me and basically being the exact opposite of who he'd always appeared to be, I hadn't seen him. He'd let me cry in his arms for hours until I fell asleep. The act was gentle, caring and it kind of freaked me out. I'd pledged a thousand years of hatred to him and in return, he showed a great deal of unearned compassion. These contradictions in his attitude weren't exactly new. What was bothering me however, was the traction his behaviour had gained within my own emotional responses. Yet, he was gone and so my questions and confusion went unanswered and untested.

His lack of any presence was only in the physical sense, because I could not stop thinking about him. What he was doing. How he was feeling. If he was okay. If I'd crossed his mind at all. Little things reminded me of him. And not in a logical way to be reminded of something. Of course not.

It was stupid, inconceivably inane things. The smooth handle of a door were like the touch off his hand and the small details of a canvas that hung on the corridor walls matched the wave of his hair. I'd put my hair behind my ear and suddenly, it felt as if he were standing behind me. But when I turned, he was nowhere to be found. The list goes on.

It was horrible.

I avoided eye contact, focusing on another balloon. "How should I know?"

"An interesting response, don't you think, Demetri." I glared at Felix, but he was too busy rubbing his chin in fake thought.

"Hmm," he agreed. "Quite defensive."

I groaned, fixing them with a glare, "what are you two implying?"

"Oh nothing." Felix commented nonchalantly, though this was quickly replaced by a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. "Just that one of the lower guards might have mentioned seeing our dear Alec leaving your room a few mornings ago."

Demetri had joined Felix's investigation, both playing their own form of good cop. "Anything you'd like to tell us?"

Rolling my eyes, I picked up another balloon. "Not particularly."

They frowned before attempting a new tactic. "Say, Demetri, where has good ol' Alec been anyways." I couldn't help it, I glanced up from my project to wait for his response.

"Escorted Dr. Cullen back to his coven." He gave me a side look, seeing that they had my attention. "Wonder when he'll be back...how about you, Fiya? Looking forward to Alec's return?"

I shrugged off their tactics, trying to appear as impartial as I could. "He can disappear with the library of Alexandria as far as I'm concerned." Seeing they weren't getting much out of me, they restarted their games with pouts.

As much as I hated to admit it, I did miss Alec. Though, I wasn't quite sure why or what about him triggered the feeling. It was some sort of hole in me that kept him around and at the forefront of my mind. Then, knowing it may only give them more ammunition, I couldn't help but ask, "Why do your eyes change colour?"

"Don't you remember the rhyme?" Felix said indignantly, "the darker the red—"

"The more recently fed, I know. But how long should it last?" The two exchanged mischievous glances once again and paused their game another time.

Demetri turned a shit eating grin on me. "Why do you ask?"

I bit the inside of my cheek and glanced up, trying to calm my heartbeat at the suggestion. "It's just that sometimes they change to black so quickly..." As soon as the words left my mouth, I knew I'd been made. I could only be referring to Alec's fits. He was always told to go feed after I'd pissed him off. With their additional knowledge, of course they'd made the connection.

"Base instincts." Demetri offered. "Anger, jealousy-"

"Arousal." Felix winked and flipped back around to the game. My eyes widened as I took this in and Demetri barked out a laugh before picking up his console just in time for Felix to unpause it. Felix's attempt to cheat distracted the conversation and it seemed they'd forgotten about their prime opportunity to tease me. That is, until Felix asked again with an even more suggestive tone, "so, how _is_ Alec?"

I impulsively turned the balloon I was just about to tie and let the air blow into Felix's face. He attempted to bat it away from him as I burst into a fit of laughter. "Gross! Not cool."

I was too busy holding my stomach to sympathise with the distress my attack had caused him. "Your face!"

Felix grabbed a new balloon and blew it up to a wimpy size before returning the favour. I also tried to push away the air spraying my face. "Ew! You're disgusting."

"You did it first!"

"Shh!" Demetri hushed us and all three of us froze as if expecting something dramatic. Demetri's head swung to the doors and he jumped up. "Incoming. Hide the balloons."

"What?" I barely moved before the balloons started disappearing from around the room two by two. I leaned back onto the couch solemnly as the two men returned to their controllers on the ground in front of me, already gearing up for the next level.

The room was clear of any balloon evidence just in time for Heidi's heels to enter it. The woman's normally professionally suggestive attire had been traded in for a much more risqué theme. She'd gone from a high end, but discreet escort to Paris Hilton circa 2006.

Letting out a low whistle, Demetri winked at Heidi. "Looking good, Heidi. What's the occasion?"

She pointed to me then herself, purposefully excluding the guys, "we are going out." Before I could ask any questions, the boys denied her, claiming me for themselves.

"Psh. No way, Saffiya's ours. We are attending to some very important business." That was one way of putting it. "You can have her tomorrow."

Heidi crossed her arms over her chest. "Haven't you two got anything better to do than force her to watch violence and half naked women?"

"It's educational."

"Yeah, we're teaching her battle strategy and war stuff."

I piped in for two reasons. Mainly because I was oddly enjoying the violence in the game despite multitasking with our various conversation topics. The storyline wasn't half bad and it was almost like watching a film. The second was that I had a feeling that Heidi expected me to dress up right along with her and her heels could spear a freaking shark. No, thank you. "And its role in gender politics. It's a metaphor...for the transition of society...during wars."

Heidi blinked, almost seeming convinced. Felix took one hand from his controller and discretely fist bumped my save, giving Demetri the opportunity to attack him in the game. Yet again, a game over screen appeared and Felix's jaw dropped.

"Not fair!"

"Snooze, you lose!" Demetri gloated, glancing at Heidi to see if he had her attention. He didn't.

I threw my arms behind my head and grinned at Heidi. "Hey Heidi, Demetri had some unique thoughts on the dangers that video games pose to modern society due to their hyper sexualization of women." The man I'd referred to stared at me, wide eyed at my claim. I jerked my head over towards Heidi.

Heidi raised an eyebrow at Demetri, actually looking impressed. Demetri appeared to be uncharacteristically flustered by Heidi's level of interest in the fact that he had positive, forward-thinking, intellectual thoughts on gender. It was a change from his usual glamorous charm, but he'll thank me one day.

"Is that so?" I'd noticed that in Heidi's mural, between a blue sun and a yin and yang symbol, was an attempted portrait drawing of Gloria Steinem. I figured she'd be intrigued if Demetri showed any recognition of the topic, but I never thought she'd believe it so easily.

Especially not with the man's blundering reply, "what can I say? I love sex!" I waited for her to roll her eyes, but she giggled. It was my turn to exchange looks with Felix, both of us equally dumbfounded at the unexpected sound coming from the woman. Our reactions might've been for different reasons, however, because Felix followed this up with:

"Who doesn't?" I snorted and Felix patted my knee eccentrically as if I wasn't already paying attention to him. "Right, Fiya?"

"You all seem to keep forgetting that I spent my teenage years in a convent." I added nonchalantly, "outside of an anatomy book, the closest I got to sex was probably Shakespeare or the Parliament of Fowles." All eyes turned to me, stunned by my words. Although I wasn't sure what exactly was so surprising about my statement. "What?"

Heidi was also staring at me with slight disbelief before declaring, "oh my god. She's a nerd."

"I prefer intellectually curious."

A muttered, "no wonder the twins have taken so well to you" was drowned out by Felix's taunt,

"A sixteen year old who reads Chaucer? Please — nerd."

I fell back against the couch and crossed my arms in a fit. "Okay, then what do you do for fun? I can't imagine any of you have never read a book in all your centuries of existence."

Sheepishly, Demetri ran a hand through his hair. "We've just been so busy." Felix nodded his head in agreement, supporting the empty excuse.

Heidi ratted them out. "Their 'intellectual curiosity' went out the window once they discovered video games." She sat gracefully on the arm of the couch, inspecting her nails with the perfectionistic attitude of a cat.

"Can you blame us? It took a decade before Aro agreed to buy a television." Demetri defended them, sliding in an amusing brag of how they "had to convince Aro that video gaming would one day become a respectable art form that deserved the Volturi's admiration."

I let out a small bout of laughter, halted slightly by the sound of the leader's name. Yet, my amusement at their dedication for such a simple activity allowed me to focus on the charm with which my friends had exhibited for such a case.

Demetri grinned at this and with a quick glance to Heidi, he added, "I don't think he bought it, but he let us buy whatever we wanted."

Felix snickered beside us, "convincing him to build the movie theatre was a little more difficult."

My jaw dropped, "he actually let you build a movie theatre?"

With his signature lopsided grin, Felix said, "not yet!"

Heidi, taking her eyes briefly from her nails, chimed in with an unusual suggestion. "Perhaps you could get him to change his mind, Fiya."

Felix patted my leg excitedly, "yeah! He likes you." He missed the pointed look Demetri sent him, but I was already questioning his logic and the audacity of his words. Heidi swiped at the back of his head and his hand went to cover it, "hey!"

I almost choked on the air that rushed into my lungs. Collecting myself, I tried to bring the lightheartedness back into the room, but my attempt fell short. "I'd hate to see what he does to the people he hates."

Demetri's face grew real serious for a second before he nodded and said, "don't worry. You will."

Almost immediately, Heidi broke the tension that had been ignited with Demetri's ominous comment. "That's enough of that. It's my turn." She declared, standing from her seat and waving her hand towards me. "Ready, Saffiya?"

I hesitated, glancing at the guys. "Where exactly are we going?"

"Lusso."

The answer drew a surprisingly outraged response from the two men. "Without us!"

"No fair!"

Heidi raised her hands as if to hold them back. "Girl's night, gentlemen." She winked at Demetri, "maybe next time."

"But Fiya might not be human next time. There's so many possibilities—"

"What's Lusso?" I interrupted, feeling even more out of the loop than usual.

"It's a night club."

I started to rise from my position on the couch, "like, outside the castle?" If there was one thing that had become clear over the last two weeks or so, it was that I was severely lacking in vitamin D and fresh air. All I wanted was to sit outside, under the sun and just take in the world around me. Though right now, I'd settle for the shining moon and night air.

Heidi raised a finger to include the single stipulation. "You have to promise not to try and run away again."

"Cross my heart, " I agreed fervently. "Can we go now? Let's go!"

"Kids. They only break your heart." I heard Felix cry dramatically as I practically dragged Heidi out of his room.


	14. Prudence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Heidi, Chelsea, and Jane get ready to take Saffiya to a club.

**W** e made it to Heidi's room in record time after she 'liberated me', as she put it, from Felix and Demetri. Unfortunately, an early arrival on our part only provided more time for a contractually obligated fashion scene.

Not much work had been done on her mural since my last visit, and it still remained half coloured and half empty of any drawings whatsoever. A true work in progress. The rest of the room, however, looked like the backstage of a fashion show running three hours behind. Every surface possible had been hijacked, including an easel in the corner, and put to use for shoes, clothing, jewellery, cosmetics, and the necessary undergarments.

Unlike my room, there was no bed, rather a half moon couch as the main focus of the room. The length of the couch had been put to use to separate and spread out different sections of clothes, mainly a slew of dresses and several fashion-not-warmth geared jackets. It was organized chaos, but I bit my tongue to keep from jokingly asking whether it took more time for the two of them to make the mess or to get ready in it.

I'd like to consider myself a team player, but something about the setup made me feel a little ill. It's not that I wasn't into clothing or dressing up. My father was part American and no matter what country we were in, we always celebrated his favourite holiday: Halloween. And when I was a little girl, I had this doll that I liked to pretend was a part time princess/part time time traveling spy that got to wear both royal ballgowns and historically interesting outfits.

Although, the fact that I just named Halloween and a childhood doll as my connections to fashion, certainly gives an idea of my level of interest in the task at hand. The task being finding me the perfect clubbing outfit.

Upon our arrival, my current outfit had been given a shameful head shake by Heidi just in time for Chelsea to emerge from the bathroom. The shorter woman was already dressed in a spaghetti strap, short, cheetah print dress and heels that made her legs go on for miles. "Oh good, you procured the human. Those," she pointed to a pile of dresses hanging over one section of the couch, "should fit her."

I'd only been around Chelsea a handful of times so far. I definitely wasn't her favourite person in the entire world. And I think my blood bothered her since she was one of the younger of the Volturi. Though she was an extremely high ranking member and perhaps that's why her control was still well managed with me. If she had the choice, however, I don't think it would be to spend time around me.

She never addressed me directly, but she wasn't cruel about it. Heidi assured me it wasn't personal, rather it was the matter of my humanity. And once that was fixed she was positive that Chelsea would want to spend more time with me.

"Elizabeth's coming as well." Hands on her hips, she smiled at me. "You've met, haven't you?"

Elizabeth was the lower guard member who had given me the wrong date on Felix's fake homework assignment. I hadn't exactly spoken to or seen the woman since. "I suppose."

"Actually, Bess sends her regrets."

The other woman's jaw dropped at the news. "But why! She never misses girl night."

Chelsea shrugged, her eyes flashing over to me before returning to the larger mirror in the bathroom, throwing over her shoulder, "She said to 'have fun with your pet'." The cattiness was unnecessary, though not purposeful on Chelsea's end. Still, I rolled my eyes; I should've stayed with Demetri and Felix.

Where Chelsea tolerated me, Elizabeth apparently had no patience for my existence. This wasn't the first time I'd heard of a snide comment aimed at my expense from Elizabeth's desk. The guys, gossips that they were, had mentioned one or two offhand comments about how she needed to learn her place. As usual, they refused to go into any further detail but managed to slide in a subtle joke about me needing to get back on her good side.

Like with Chelsea, I tried not to take it personally. I couldn't help but think that her reasons for disliking me spanned beyond my humanity. But, I had only theories on what those reasons could be, and so I didn't let it bother me much.

"Saffiya — pay attention." I snapped up from my slouched position on her couch as Heidi held up yet another dress. She refused to let me sit, as she raised each new hanger up to my body from five feet away with her eyebrows furrowed in concentration. I shook my head yet again as she held up new dresses in each hand. Sighing, Heidi tossed one aside before throwing the other at me. "Try it on." I lifted the piece of fabric to my line of sight and stared at it with distaste.

This was nothing like Halloween.

Not only were they not costumes, but none of the dresses before us were the kind you would wear on any general outing, like a sundress and they were about as far from a church dress as you could go. Aside from colour, they didn't look all that different to me. Each one was short, busty and tight — and I turned them each down like a fashionable Simon Cowell.

Shaking my head profusely, I declared, "there's no way I'm wearing that." Heidi let out an extremely exaggerated groan of contempt and threw the dress onto the growing pile of no's.

Crossing her arms over her chest, she grumbled, "will you work with me here?"

"I don't understand why I can't just wear this." I gestured to my current outfit — jeans and a tank top. I'd never been to a club before, but I'd seen movies. How different could it be? And surely, there would be enough people that no one would care who I was or what I was wearing. It wasn't exactly a red carpet event.

Heidi shrieked in distress and the sudden sound had me jumping up from the couch once again. For half a second, I thought that maybe there was some kind of a substantial threat that I hadn't noticed before I realized it was only Heidi's reaction to my request. "It doesn't even have sequins!"

"I don't think I've worn sequins since I was six."

"Heidi, leave the child alone." Chelsea walked out of the bathroom once more, pining the final touches on her hair. The shorter woman frequently glanced between the mirrors in the room again before seeming to finally decide that her hair was satisfactory.

Vampires were likely the most beautiful beings in existence, which is perhaps why their automatic slips of vanity amused me greatly. A fact that, one would think, would lessen their insecurities rather than heightening them. Instead, the opposite seemed to reign true. It moved across gender lines, I'd noticed, though Demetri was more regularly beholden to it than Felix. I'd even caught Caius folding a piece of his hair under another as he'd passed by the library one day, oblivious to my presence. The various mirrors throughout the castle saw so many visitors they may as well have been moving portraits like in the Harry Potter world. Perhaps there was a Freudian fear within the vamps that urged them to treasure it in place of what they could not recover from their humanity. I wondered if I, too, would fall victim to such an ideal once they'd changed me.

Chelsea gave the most recent dress option a more thorough glance over, then made her own face. "I agree with her...it will be much too short."

The other woman tossed the dress off to the side with a disdainful look. "Well, I refuse to let her dress like she's attending a sports match."

"Of course not, but I do not believe that Alec would appreciate your promoting of her assets to a crowd of rowdy, inebriated men." Chelsea asserted sternly and recognizing the validity of her friend's perspective, Heidi backed down. She muttered something unintelligible in response just as the door to the room swung open with a measured pace.

"What is this about my brother?" A slightly more mature looking Jane let herself in to the room. I'd never been so relieved to see anyone in my entire life. If anyone would be able to help get Heidi off my case, Jane had to be at the top. However, as the three of us took in her appearance, my hope for a bail out lowered.

The better half of the twins had managed to hit an ideal classy/slutty mark in her outfit tonight that Heidi was having difficulty finding for me. Not that this was her goal, after all, because from what I'd observed, Heidi's style never needed to be classy. She was able to pull off a combination of slutty and mature by simply existing and it worked wonders for her. I, however, never had to dress for any particular style before. Though looking between the three women now, I did know which one I'd gravitate towards if I got a vote.

Chelsea smirked as her eyes ran over Jane's body, from going out heels to a hairstyle designed by an overnight braid that left her hair flowing past her shoulders in messy waves. "Speaking of pissing Alec off."

"Spot on, Jane." I admired her, and she gave me a small smile. "I like your jeans." I turned my head pointedly to Heidi.

The woman barely lifted her head. She gave me only one short and mocking laugh, "ha!"as if to tell me that there was no way she was backing down.

I crossed my arms against my chest again and threw myself back dramatically into the fluff of the couch. Jane made her way to sit beside me, flowing elegantly onto the cushion and sending me a little more genuine of a grin now that the others weren't looking.

Just like the rest of my main circle, she'd been missing from my daily activities while I mourned. I hadn't realized how I had grown to rely on her visits in the beginning to stabilise myself in the new environment. I was constantly reminding myself how fortunate I was to have gained her as a friend, especially considering that her twin and I couldn't so much as be in the same room as each other at the time.

Though I spent no one-on-one time with guard members outside of my body guard circle, I continued to test myself on their names. In doing so, I also uncovered more and more about their individual routines and personalities. Overall, one could claim that while on duty the guard was more serious and when off, most of them lost that stern quality in favour of their natural personalities and quirks.

After casual observation and a few pointed questions, I came to understand that the members of the Volturi had a unique balance of who they were on the front lines as opposed to how they interacted when the masks came off. It certainly wasn't a big, happy, sitcom family, though there were clusters of the guard that hung out more often than not. These clusters were often made up of the lower and middle guard members that were single and as a result, their activities were much looser. Typically, they confined their hangouts to the training (and games) room or other facilities in the castle. There was once a standing Monopoly Monday that the entire castle was invited to, until one night some things were said, money was thrown, and the hat was stolen. The next day, Caius and Marcus had announced a ban on Monopoly to the guard, a meeting that Aro was suspiciously absent for.

It seemed that personal bedrooms remained relatively private. A standard that Heidi assigned to a hundred year period where Aro held an innumerable amount of parties. After a number of complaints about room privacy not being respected and the lower guard members, the unspoken policy moved into place. I have chosen to refer to it as the House Party Bunny Conundrum.

The low, middle, high level separations of the guards did keep the groups quite separate. Though this was more out of happenstance than any sort of mean girl system. The lower and middle guards were the only members that rarely, if ever, interacted with the three kings or the wives outside of official duties. The higher guard members were more often the direct guards for any of the five ruling vampires.

While the coven mixed quite a bit, the highest ranking guard members were less involved with the other guard's extra curricular activities. Most notably, the twins. The guys told me that, for the most part, the twins were satisfied with each other's company for most of the beginning of their lives. Eventually and up to the current date, they branched out to the significant members of the coven, if not only the black coats. In general, it sounded like their attendance for anything casual was rare but everyone had a good time whether they were there or not.

I did notice one thing that stood out when the twins were included. In the most casual settings, such as this one right now, in which playful conversations and empty quips were being thrown about whilst they played 'dress the human like a trollop'; all appeared normal. Jane was smiling, happy, but it didn't take much to recognize the vigilance of the other members of the guard.

They, too, were enjoying themselves. But, Jane's presence alone worked as a trigger for every vampire's underlying self-preservation instincts.

History and every day since, had taught all of the guard members that Jane was quick to anger and always more than willing to respond with her gift. As a result, there seemed to be an underlying focus on maintaining Jane's mood whenever she was present; and of Alec's, if they were able to get a read on the more calculating twin. Everything only seemed to reinforce the idea that she was unpredictable, and her brother was no better.

Until I arrived, that is. It had been pointed out to me that my arrival and the nature of my relationships with either twin had resulted in a choose your own adventure book of possible scenarios. Already, members were seeing the effects from Alec's attack on Prosper to Alec being scolded by Aro. (The latter referring to two separate occasions in my first two days that had apparently delighted a middle level guard, who had major beef with Alec, so much that the guard decided he and the boy were even. My bruises and I were happy to help.) Some guards, like Elizabeth, weren't fans. As if I had any say in the future.

The twins proved to be a consistently controversial topic within the coven and it seemed that my fate had been tied into theirs.

"Alec has no say in what I, nor what Saffiya, wear." Jane declared, in a lighthearted tone, "— speaking of, why are you not dressed?"

I pouted, sticking my tongue out at the hold out. "Heidi seems to have forgotten that I was raised by Catholic nuns and anything that hangs above my knee feels like a sin." Chelsea snorted from inside the closet and I gave myself a mental huzzah for the reaction, while Heidi rolled her eyes.

She held up another dress, this one made out of thin black satin or something else silky. "Uh huh, no way. I'm beat." I shook my head as fast as I could from side to side, letting my curls whip around my head with a childish lack of control. "Besides, did you think this through? I'm not even old enough to club yet." It had been my last resort argument and it fell flat, especially when Heidi managed to move past it so smoothly.

"Which is why you need to wear a dress." Heidi stood her ground and I moaned, throwing my head forward on the couch pillows yet another time. About ten seconds after my head was hidden in the cushions, there was a fast-paced mumbling of words before Heidi spoke back up with a new approach. "Fine. Here. If this one doesn't work, we can talk about a skirt." She grabbed one of the last three in the pile and handed it out for me to take. I raised my eyebrows before giving in because I didn't have much of a choice.

However, as I reached out for it, Jane intercepted the fabric. She held it up to examine the front and back before nodding and shoving it at my chest. I made no effort to hide my contempt for the cloth, though I hadn't actually looked at any other detail of the item. "At least try it on," she requested and without waiting for a response, she pushed me off the sofa and the other two women shooed me towards the bathroom.

I instead ducked into the closet, vowing to make quick work of my assignment. I ran the fabric through my fingers, checking for a zipper. Reluctantly, I slipped the dress over my head and tossed my jeans and tank to the side. In my hurry, I didn't consider checking the mirror before stepping back out. I had a feeling that any personal issues I may have with the dress would be overshadowed by the apparel itself.

Flexing the skirt of the dress in the light, the holographic material definitely made a statement. I reconsidered the purpose behind my dress options. Perhaps, it was Halloween after all and they were just assuming I'd take part in the adult version. Maybe they'd already decided we had a group costume to be a bunch of night walkers and this particular dress was the backup costume idea. Maybe Halloween in July was an Italian thing?

"Er...Heidi? What kind of club is this?" I asked the women, beginning to mess with the straps of the dress, already prepared to take it off. I was interrupted as Heidi grabbed my hand and pulled me further into the middle of the room before I could take it off.

Her eagerness backfired as she had already started to exclaim in fabricated excitement, "it's perfect!" Just before she saw the dress in its full glory. She faltered, taking a step back and scanning her eyes up and down the tight uniform. The positivity she'd tried to spark around the dress was left in a free-fall as she struggled to find a word to benefit her goals.

Chelsea and Jane were also lost for words, watching as I awkwardly shifted my arms around, trying to pull the fabric that barely covered my boob to cover more of my skin.

Jane began to giggle as soon as she caught sight of me. "You look like a jellyfish."

"Oh," I commented thoughtfully, looking down at the dress. I was forced to blink rapidly the instant my eyes caught the reflection of the ceiling light in the fabric. "I was thinking of an alien."

Jane had scrunched up her nose, now taking a swipe at the fabric. "What's that noise?"

"Factory plastic?" I shrugged. "Chelsea?"

Her name was repeated by the other girls twice more before she pulled her focus from the dress to us. She fiddled with her words for a second as if searching for something useful to contribute. "Alien jellyfish?"

All three of us turned to Heidi. The woman took one circle trip around me and finally, she sighed. "I thought you'd like this one."

I bit my lip. "I do!" I did. As a Halloween costume. For a friend...a really eccentric friend. "Just, more for a child's birthday party." Even Chelsea seemed to take pity on me and they let me retreat to change back into my normal clothes.

It seemed that Chelsea had also grown tired of the relentless back and forth of dramatics because she exited the closet just as I did the bathroom, just in time to see her throw something at Heidi. "Compromise." Heidi frowned, letting the fabric drop in the air between her fingers. "Black jeans, booties, that top. Red lipstick et voilà. It will age her four years." It was clear that Chelsea was the brains behind the fashion and I took a mental note, wondering how I'd never noticed.

The top she'd chosen was actually the perfect compromise. It was still the most revealing thing I'd ever worn, but I liked the way it made me feel. Confident. Attractive. It was a backless black top that tied together in the back with a thin lace. Short strings of tiny beads dangled from the bottom and tickled my stomach right below my belly button, giving it a taste of youthful class.

It was an automatic crowdpleaser, immediately receiving approval and praise from Jane and Chelsea. Heidi was still pouting and I bit my lip. "Heidi, I promise one day I'll wear any dress you want me to. But, for now, I think we should just work up to something so…revealing."

This seemed to satisfy her and that was when it hit me. The first step of the plan that would get my life back. A first step that would be easier said than done, but which was so glaringly obvious that it was a wonder I was only just thinking of it.

I'd taken my time to mourn. I'd tried to escape and I'd fought back in whatever ways I could. But vampires had become my new normal despite it all. It was time to give in and play the part I'd been assigned until something changed. I was adjusting to saying the phrase 'when I'm a vampire', but I still had no intent to see it through. So, if I got the chance, I would take it.

Only by playing this role, could I ever hope to escape the Volturi. It wasn't over until my heart stopped beating.

I turned to look in the mirror, as Heidi gave me a genuine smile and confirmed her approval, "you look fierce, Fiya."

I ran a hand through my hair, feeling more subconscious than I had only seconds ago. "Is that a good thing?"

A smug smile appeared on her lips and she winked. "Let's go find out."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends, I hope you are all enjoying life! I am definitely aware that this may be an odd chapter for many reasons. It was very much unavoidable - trust me, I tried. But, I hope it gives ya a giggle anyways. Thank you for commenting and for all the kudos!


	15. Green

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Heidi, Chelsea, and Jane take Saffiya to a club.

**T** he fast-paced beat of dance music reverberated through the floor like an earthquake. A continuous rumble kept the nightclub on a constant earthquake alert status. If there were words to the songs being replayed, I would bet money that the partygoers did not know the lyrics. Or perhaps the lyrics did not matter to them as they flailed about, shouting out random words in sync with the music before laughing about nothing in particular.

The building had been remodelled from an old theatre, the seats taken out to make room for a dance floor on the ground level. The DJ booth was set up on the stage, raised up in front of a mass of dancers and surrounded by enormous speakers. From the orchestra to the mezzanine, and throughout the grand entrance hall, there was gold marble lining the walls and floors. It must have been a grand performance space in its peak.

Our entrance into the main area triggered a subtle reaction. Crowds parted and heads turned to stare as Chelsea led our small group's way through the throngs of people. Their presence alone was like a magnet for people's attention. There was no audio cue over the blasting music to inform them of the arrival of the most beautiful creatures they have ever seen. Rather, the recognition seemed to be innate. As if it were their very purpose to be seen and acknowledged by something so otherworldly. They were practically begging to be the vampire's next victims.

We had barely reached the dance floor before Heidi and Jane were asked to dance leaving Chelsea and I to awkwardly adjust to the location and our new one-on-one situation. Chelsea handed me her purse and directed me to choose a table overlooking the dance floor. At least, that's what I think she meant. She just sort of waved her hand towards the DJ and then at the booths nearest us.

I weaved through the masses of people, finally popping through to the near empty seating area. It was early enough in the night, that no one needed nor wanted to sit. Only a single couple, already lost in each other's throats, practically wrestled with each other in a corner booth. I settled in, casually tossing the purse on the other side of the table and turned to watch the dancers.

Chelsea joined me moments later, handing me a drink.

"Thank you, but I don't drink."

"It's water." She barely glanced at me, choosing instead to look through her purse. "I have no interest in managing a drunk human tonight."

"Make that two of us." For some reason, my response earned me an amused twinkle of her eyes. Maybe it was the smoke in the air or the unexplained gust of air on my exposed back, but I considered the possibility that I might just win Chelsea over tonight. That is, if I played my cards right.

Before I could do so, Jane returned, deliberately seating herself between me and Chelsea and assumably, more importantly, further from the crowd that teetered on the edges inches from our table. We both gave her curious eyes, but Jane shook her head deliberately.

"Humans do not change."

Chelsea let out a sweet giggle, hiding her laugh fashionably behind her hand. "Sweetheart, humans change. Men, on the other hand."

I spoke before I could think, suggesting half-heartedly, "should've used your gift on him." A sly smirk grew on Jane's face as she stared out into the crowd.

"Jane!" Chelsea exclaimed, not half as outraged by the girl's behaviour as she sounded. "You didn't?"

Jane rolled her eyes as if being scolded by a step-parental figure. She held onto her hard, carefree demeanour. "He's fine…a little sore," as soon as she caught my eyes, the smirk on her lips became more genuine of a smile. "He was so drunk he slipped on an ice cube. Broke his nose." I broke first, and soon Jane joined me in small laughter. As surprised as Chelsea was to see Jane laughing so openly, I think she was more in awe at the fact that I had triggered it.

"You two really are a pair, aren't you." I was definitely mistaken, but there was the slightest hint of adoration in her voice at the thought of Jane and I's friendship. And what did she mean? Were we a unique pair in general? Our ages were practically the same biologically. Or was it just that Jane's stone cold demeanour was so excellently crafted that imagining her with a friend was as impossible as man in space?

Not long after Jane's arrival, we spotted Heidi stomping over to our table. The small Italian man who had offered her his hand only minutes ago was trailing behind her, shouting what sounded like apologies. I was genuinely curious as to how the human had so quickly wasted his opportunity to even engage with a gorgeous being such as Heidi but only a few feet from our table, he managed to jump in front of her.

It all happened so quickly. One second, the man is trying to smooth talk her, but in the instant he placed his hand on her bum to pull her closer, she reacted. Heidi nearly ripped his hand off of her before stepping back and full on flipping the dude in front of her. He landed on his back, groaning against the tile. I could now read the distinctive letters on his otherwise black shirt: Best Man's Best Man, written out in silver. Was that supposed to be a compliment?

Some of the people around them gasped and were all too happy watched the action unfold. As gracefully as a movie star, Heidi fixed her front curls and literally stepped over the man, closing the last few feet to sit beside Chelsea at our table.

As soon as she had moved away, two men sporting similarly themed outfits stood above him and giggled childishly at their friend's misfortune. One shirt read: Best Man, and the other: (Un)lucky Bastard. Quite a unique group of friends, with a wonderful way to celebrate a wedding. No one seemed particularly worried about the man's physical condition, though it seemed that pride would be his most damaged possession this evening. I turned away from the sight, though the others seemed just as entertained as the rest of the crowd.

"For a group that claims to hate humans. You all sure enjoy an activity that requires a lot of them."

Heidi shrugged, admitting, "we don't usually interact quite this much."

Chelsea added a coy smile to the conversation. "At least, not like this."

"This is more for your sake."

"So, you, handing that guy his butt, that was for my benefit?"

"All for you." I raised my water in cheers at Heidi's giddy claim. The DJ said something into the mic that got lost in my translation, but whatever he said perked Heidi up even more. "Oh my goodness, I love this song!" Heidi squealed. It seemed that the more we settled in, the more prominent it was that Heidi had adopted a new personality. One that was suspiciously identical to the tipsy, ditzy woman in a crappy teen film. Even more curious was that I don't think she did it on purpose, as if the persona were a natural adjustment to the scene.

Jane ran a hand through her hair beside me, much like her brother. She muttered to me behind a raised palm. "It gets worse."

"Let's hit the floor, ladies!" With that, Heidi swept me from the booth, leaving Jane to cackle at my misfortune. But I wasn't about to let that slide, so I managed to grab a hold of her hand to pull her along with us.

There was no way I was doing this alone. "Time to act your age, Janey!" I grinned childishly at her. She rolled her eyes at my words, but accepted my hand, joining us on the embracing of the dance floor.

Now dancing among the other people, I was introduced to another gratitude that was owed to my congenital insensitivity as I observed hundreds of other humans dancing with beads of sweat on their foreheads. I noticed after we passed a rather pretty girl smiling and laughing along with everyone else. The baby hairs on her forehead stuck to her skin as she jumped to the music with her friends. She'd stopped dancing as she fanned herself, complaining to her friends of overheating and how the sweat was ruining her makeup. Not being able to feel the temperature meant I didn't sweat. That's right, I always smell this good.

All in all, it had been a great nice so far. A right of passage, of sorts, that I never expected to experience no matter what my future held. I guess it all goes to show that life has its own plan, its own surprises and all you can do is hang on for dear life for the ride.

As I laughed at something Heidi said, a gentle tapping on my shoulder prompted me to spin around.

And into the arms of a very fit, very human guy.

Even under the dark, flashing lights of the club, his olive skin stood out in the crowd. A five o'clock shadow enunciated a square jaw and for some reason, I lost the ability to use my words. The polite thing to do, would be to look away. After all, staring at a complete stranger was not only rude, but it was certainly something you didn't want to get caught doing.

He was just so darn pretty.

It took me a moment to realise that he was saying words. "Oh, sorry, I don't speak Italian."

He smiled and surprised me as an undistinguishable accent repeated, "would you care to dance?"

I turned back to the girls. Jane had stopped dancing, a distinctly sour expression on her face, which made me inclined to deny his offer. However, Heidi didn't seem to notice either of our hesitation. "She'd love to!" She gently shoved me towards him, letting me stumble into the random guy's arms.

I hastily regained my balance, mumbling an apology and turning around to shoot Heidi an indignant scowl. However, I was distracted by the terrifyingly livid expression on Jane's face. She was already whispering angrily to Heidi, but a gentle tug on my hand brought my attention back to the boy beside me. His eyes were soft, but murky and I politely smiled before changing the direction I was looking in. The familiar wave of butterflies made an appearance in my stomach as I caught myself wishing they were the familiar red of someone that wasn't present at the moment.

"Shall we?"

"Er…sure."

As we walked away, I saw Jane accepting the hand of a boy asking Heidi to dance and dragging him away from the older woman. The boy didn't seem to mind much at all and Heidi claimed his friend.

My view of the Volturi women was blocked as we headed deeper into the crowd of dancing people.

"What is your name?"

"Saffiya."

"I am Travis." We shared awkward smiles, standing in the middle of the dance floor, until he made the first move.

He placed a hand on the small of my waist and I blurted out, "listen, I really don't know how to dance like…" a young woman passing us by was moving her hips like Shakira with one hand in the air and her mouth slightly opened.

His laughter in response to my confession was disarming and I found myself smiling in return.

"I must tell you a secret." He leaned down to whisper in my ear, his breath was light with a gentle scent of liquor on the tongue. "Neither can she." Travis pulled away from me, looking down and grinning.

"Good to know." He seemed to be pleased as I laughed at his confident humour, and so he continued.

"Let me teach you basic steps, and I promise that they will always see you through on the dance floor."

I didn't exactly need any tips, seeing as it wasn't likely that I would spend much more time on a dance floor in the near future. But his face glowed, keen and eager to share his secret with me. I moved my head up and down to accept his offer.

"Do you feel the rhythm?"

"Maybe?"

"Good. Now, try moving your hips…like this." He slowly moved his hands to my waist, watching me as if waiting to see if I would stop him. But he was harmless, so I didn't. His large hands securely, but gently held each of my hips and he guided their movement to match our steps.

He was able to loosen his hold as I picked up the moves. Before I knew it, we were actually dancing along to the music. The simple success made me giddy and my excitement was shared by my teacher, who announced my competency. "You're a natural!"

Tucking a strand of hair behind my ear, I joked, "are you a professional dancer or something?"  
Rubbing the back of his head in slight modesty, Travis smiled warmly at me. "Actually, yes. My dance team and I are here for an international competition."

I nodded, impressed with his obvious determination and passion though my genuine interest was lacking."That's amazing!"

"We've spent half our lives working to get here and it's our last chance, but we have a good shot." He declared proudly, looking down at me and switching gears for an equal conversation. "So, what brings you to beautiful Italia?"

I frowned slightly, "I was searching for my father. He was missing for five years."

"Was?" "He died." I informed him, not particularly caring about the bluntness of my statement. "1500 kilometres, two countries over from where he was supposed to be."

"You're sure he's dead? Ever seen the movie, Cold Case?" I glanced away at the odd and slightly inappropriate question. He got the hint to move on.

On my right, I caught another glimpse of Jane.

Jane seemed to be walking a fine line from the first tottering human we'd seen on the sidewalk. The clear contempt she held for humans was clear and unfortunately somewhat valid in our current activity. The tolerance level had definitely lowered as the general amount of inebriated individuals went up. The less magical view of the club than I'd been admiring would've seen a woman throwing up in a potted plant in a corner and some couples going a little further than they should've in public before they got shoved out. Shameful for human kind? No doubt. Shameful for them? Not tonight. But Jane was definitely dishing that shame out.

Seeing her interact with other humans struck me as odd and I was able to put together why Felix and Demetri were so perturbed by our friendship. It should scream all kinds of suspicious, but Jane had never given any reason for such distrust. Besides, I was only human. What had she to lose? Hearing her talk and listening to her stories, her hate for my kind was clear, even if I was some sort of exception.

Yet, she hid her distaste well while she interacted with the lot. Distracting herself with other aspects of their presence. Still, I caught her scrunching her nose for a second as the boy holding her in his arms leaned down to whisper in her ear. Surprisingly, a sugary sweet smile followed it, softening her face into the false security her innocent appearance provided. Well, I guess it was safe to say she'd forgotten her anger with Heidi.

She whispered something back to him before taking his hand and leading him away from the dance floor. Jane caught my eye as they passed me and she winked.

Right. There was only one reason for them to interact with humans like this. It wasn't as if they needed them to have this kind of naive fun, although maybe to fill some other needs.

My dance partner took my hand and managed to guide me through a spin under his arm and I laughed out loud through the manoeuvre. Travis pulled me back in against his chest and our dancing slowed to a near stop. His fingertips rested on the exposed skin of my back, just above my jeans. I could smell the bourbon on him as he leaned in closer to my face. He paused.

"May I kiss you, Saffiya?" He watched me through thick lashes, and though they were beautiful…they weren't the ones I wanted to be looking into.

I cleared my throat and took a step back, right into another person. I mean, clubs are close contact by nature but I was not this clumsy. Manoeuvring back around to say I was sorry, the apology caught in my throat and was replaced with, "Alec?"

It was Alec all right, with an arrival as if cued by my thoughts. He lacked his usual formal jacket or sweater, looking more casual than I ever expected to see him. Mostly due to the wrinkles that creased the expensive shirt. He was still supposed to be on his mission and even if he'd returned early, why was he here instead of at the castle?

I bit my lip as a fear intruded on my thoughts; what if he had heard Travis' last words?

Judging by the intense, smouldering look on his face as he glared slightly upward at the poor guy, he most certainly had. And he definitely didn't appreciate the proposal, despite the technically polite design of asking for permission.

In his usual high and mighty demeanour, Alec ordered, "it is time to go."

I was stuck staring at him. The last time I'd seen him, I'd not only picked a fight and said some awful things. I'd also broken down in a fit of grief and pity with tears streaming down my face and sobs wracking my chest. And he'd stayed with me. Held me safely in his arms for hours after exhaustion had driven me to sleep. When the sun rose the next day, he pressed a kiss to my forehead and disappeared on some secret mission.

"What are you doing here?"

Now here he was, standing before me in a nightclub and I wasn't sure whether to thank him for that night or tell him to mind his business in this moment.

Left in the awkward interaction, my dance partner reached out a hand to greet Alec. "Hey, man. I'm Travis," he introduced himself casually and tossed an arm over my shoulder. Alec didn't shake his hand, instead staring daggers at the arm across my shoulders. Travis' prompted, "and who are you?"

Alec's glare dissolved into a smirk, "I'm her boyfriend." Somehow, the loss of aggressiveness was more intimidating than his hostile approach.

Travis raised his eyebrows at me and some of the weight on my shoulders disappeared a little. I glared at Alec, shaking my head relentlessly. "No. He isn't." I assured the man, not wanting to be seen as a cheater or a harlot. The fact that Alec suggested such an idea tempting me to tell him where he could shove it.

Travis gave me a lopsided grin, not seeming to care that Alec was still with us. "All mine, then." The weight of his arm reappeared and he tugged me in so our sides were touching. I caught myself from a minor trip at the sudden movement, but Alec still caught it.

I watched the vampire's jaw tighten, clearly displeased at the purposeful act of dominance. There was a fierceness that hit me in the chest and sent my heart from zero to fifty. Without missing a beat — literally — Alec's body tensed even more and our eyes met. My throat constricted, conscious of the fact that very little held Alec back from harming the other man. I was used to Alec's temper by now, but there was something different about this.

Or maybe it was me, because it was the first time that I had the conscious thought that stated: This boy is beyond fit.

As commercially appealing as Travis' was, he couldn't hold a candle to Alec — with, or without the immortal bonuses. Alec was naturally handsome. I had certainly noticed it before, but I wasn't keen to pointedly acknowledge it. So, whether the thought was inspired by the context of our situation or it was just him, once I admitted the attraction, I couldn't not notice it. The youth of his features, which may have played against him as a human were amplified by the vampire attributes in a way that maintained the fullness of his cheeks but defined his bone structure. Between the way his hair fell into his eyes and the intensity of his gaze, I likened the way it made me feel to what I imagined Elvis' presence had inspired in young women. A thought that only made me feel more embarrassed and I swore I'd never admit any of it out loud.

Travis triggered some kind of amplification of the superior predacious nature of Alec's species, nature overcoming hundreds of years of nurture. In a low voice, he accidentally returned to his originally threatening technique, "take your hand off of her." The threat was crystal clear as his eyes grew a tint darker. The space between the three of us became more sinister, thick with the animosity of protection.

But Travis' level of intoxication may have hindered his ability to recognize the obvious danger, as he responded harshly with, "No offence dude, but that's not your call to make."

Before Alec could do anything rash, I removed Travis' arm from my body. "Alright, let's alpha this down." Facing the latter, I asked him politely, "give us a minute?" Travis nodded, giving an additional reluctant nod to Alec.

Once he had fully retreated to his friends a few feet away, I cleared my throat and crossed my arms over my chest. "Okay, what was that?"

He wasted no time. "I do not like the way he looks at you."

My stomach erupted in a millisecond burst of butterflies. In defiance of my hormones, I snipped back, "you mean, like he doesn't want to kill me?

He ignored my jab at our la tua situation, wholly intent on making Travis an unworthy enemy. "Human males, such as him, seek to take a woman's innocence for a mere game."

I coughed in surprise at the bluntness of his statement. "Not everyone has bad intentions." If I could blush, I was sure I would be. The taboo topic having been ingrained in me through the teachings of the church. "And my…innocence has nothing to do with you." Alec was clearly amused by my bashfulness and my poor attempt to cover it up.

"Look at you," he started and his tone was littered with snark, "how would you expect to handle such a situation?" I tilted my head at him, astounded by the bitterness with which he spoke. I wasn't sure whether I should feel insulted or not. As if he had fully examined the possibilities and decided that the best way to deter me from any unfavourable situation was through fear.

I considered his position. He made a good point, as I hadn't exactly been exposed to these kinds of situations much, if at all. But I believed in people and after the last few weeks, I clung to the naive hope that I was right to do so. My silence in thought made him think he was getting through to me as he confidently continued, "now, you won't have to." Thanks to him. He repeated, "time to go."

It took a minute, but I shook my head. "I don't want to go with you." I watched Alec's eyes narrow as Travis appeared at my side once more.

"Alright, here?"

Adamantly against missing a beat, Alec cut him off, "yes. We were just leaving."

I pushed against his control of the situation. "You're wrong, and I'm gonna prove it."

His hand suddenly encased my wrist and he gently pulled me away from Travis and closer to his body. The action was so smooth that it felt almost like a dance move, one far more elegant and sensual than those around us. This action in itself reiterated every claim he had made to protect me but apparently, we perceived threats to my safety differently. He was reminding me that he had the upper hand, the strength, and the arrogance to see it through. In the lowest decibel of his voice, he hissed, "either you return to the table on your own or I throw you over my shoulder and carry you there myself."

His eyes burned red into mine and I took a step closer to him. "I'd like to see you try." I gave him a moment to process my challenge, then hesitated, before adding, "you know, one day I hope to see the side of you that Jane sees."

My words immediately transformed him into a puppy. As was my ideal intention, but the whale eyes I was receiving were more pitiful than I ever would have believed possible for Alec.

Still, I took Travis' hand and pulled him in the opposite direction, still half waiting to see if Alec would make good on his threat. But, it seemed that I found just the right way to put a chink in his armour. He let us leave and I could feel him boring holes in my back as we did so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you thank you for your comments and kudos. It always gets me writing up a storm when I read them :)


	16. Violence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Alec saves Saffiya.

" **T** hat guy was scarrryyyy." Travis words were starting to slur and I took note of the empty ounce shot glass in his hand that he exchanged for a full one as we returned to his group. "So…he your ex?"

"What? No, I'm sorry. He just gets on my freaking nerves." He offered me the shot glass and I contemplated taking the drink.

I shook my head. He shrugged and downed it. Over his shoulder, I caught the familiar gaze of the wounded pup we'd left behind. Only it seemed that his wounds had quickly found a healer in two older women. He flashed a smirk to one, while the other took the initiative to make an attempt to run her fingers through his hair. I turned my head, not eager to catch if he let her or not.

The instant I looked away, something unfamiliar overwhelmed me. It was like a roar of an emotion too impatient to be named and too eager to exist. Whatever it was had not consulted the part of my brain that made smart, rational decisions because I would have gladly continued the playfully innocent nature Travis and I had already successfully established.

But as Travis, now two more shots heavy, delicately spun me around on the dance floor, I made no move to stop him when he pulled my back flush against his chest. Despite the flow of alcohol in his veins, he stood solidly behind me. As his hips started to sway to the music, mine followed of their own accord. Our previously beginner lessons in dance now attempting to join the big leagues.

A mate of Travis' stood a few paces from us and upon seeing us, the man shouted, "güepa!". He pointed at me and raised a fist in congratulations to Travis, who returned the gesture.

I closed my eyes, shoving away how the moment could have made me feel. On one hand, it was slightly dehumanising and disrespectful. But, on the other, I'd never been so much as catcalled before tonight. There was something interesting about the conflicting emotions upon the reception of male attention, good and/or bad. Tonight alone, I had experienced it and witnessed it in different forms, with reactions ranging from an initiated kiss to splashed liquid. I had a feeling Heidi had a few theories on the topic if I ever got up the courage to talk about it.

Travis's fingertips brushed the skin of my neck, moving my hair to the side. The pads of his fingers were rough, worn from work and daily existence and they slid from the back of my neck back down to my hips. I noted that the friend was two steps ahead of us and I watched as he raised his head from his girl's neck, a small mark dotting her skin. As she tossed her head back with a drunken giggle, my own eyes widened. I stepped forward out of Travis' embrace and turned around to face him in an unusually graceful manner.

I gulped as my eyes flickered behind Travis once again. Alec was on the opposite side of the club, eyebrows narrowed and mouth slightly agape, but still keeping a heedful eye. Jane stood next to him, a frown prominently displayed on her face as her mouth moved at a ridiculous speed. He said nothing, so I guessed she was likely chastising him and assuming from how he only half faced her, she was probably right. He was too far away for me to tell for sure what he was feeling, but there was a guilt that manifested in me that decided to fill in its own blanks. We held eye contact for mere milliseconds before he looked away. I guess I was on my own.

Travis frowned, passing the empty glass in his hand unceremoniously to one of his nearby teammates who took it absentmindedly. I muttered something about the bathroom and darted off in that direction.

I chose the wrong side of the club however, as the door to the bathroom clearly indicated that it was the men's toilets. To back this up, even if I couldn't read the Italian, the alcove was entirely empty. Definitely, the men's side.

As I turned to step out of the hideout, I was instead joined by the man I had just left partnerless on the dance floor. His grin had grown sloppy over our time together and I questioned if he knew that he'd drunk past his limit. But beyond recognizing the physical signs, I had no knowledge of how to handle a drunk. Which was apparently, only half of my biggest problem at the moment as Travis' true objective became clear.

"Here, baby. I can help you forget all about the big bad ex."

There was a churning in my stomach, but the warning came too late. My mind flashed back to my arrival in Volterra as I found myself once again pressed against a wall by an unwelcome force. His close proximity allowed him to begin to feel up the side of my thighs and to barely graze my navel; automatically, I pushed him away from me.

I concentrated on keeping my voice still, as if it were armour that would break with the slightest falter of emotion. "No, thank you. We're done here."

"Such a tease." His hand landed sharply on my bum, holding its place there and pulling me flush against his chest. His hands remained on my backside, keeping me in a firm hold. I realized I was more annoyed than worried, and I was getting tired of being manhandled by…well, men. "I love a tease." I bit back a snarky reply.

I balled up my fist, ready to punch the shiz out of him but he was torn away from me.

Alec's porcelain hand gripped the neck of the young man, holding him up in the air. The exposure of his superhuman gifts didn't seem to matter, and it took me a second to realise why. Travis was raised just high enough for the front toes of his shoes to desperately attempt to regain the support of the ground below. And just like that, his role had switched.

"Alec," I breathed out for the second time that night. It seemed that any time he appeared, 'hi' was an unsatisfactory greeting or recognition. Did he purposefully choose to be dramatic, or had I suddenly gained a penchant for placing myself in damsel situations?

The déjà vu of my saviour was sending me into the Twilight's Zone's version of Animal Kingdom. Once again, I was privy to the hunt of the predator, his prey trapped and defenceless. Fully capable and a more then willing predator, Alec was free to play with his food. And Travis was his food. It was the circle of life that humans passed off as scary stories and greedy, slightly unhinged people in history. I'd seen a man have his blood drained from his body, yet this moment put my entire situation into an even deeper perspective.

The scuffling sounds of Travis' shoes scampering on the tile became more pronounced the longer the vampire held him up there. It wasn't a deliberate method of torture, but nonsensical whimpers hadn't ceased from falling out of his mouth for more than a few seconds.

In a gravelly darkness, Alec sneered at the man. "You were warned. Yet, you dared to put your hands on her."

There was no doubt that Alec cared nothing for the complications arising out of the situation. I fully believed that Alec would kill him and the rest of the party would be collateral damage. If I did nothing, there was a good chance that this kid would not make it home tonight and a part of me was indifferent to the dark thought. And for some reason…it didn't bother me.

"Pathetic human. Can you not beg for your life?"

Wheezing, Travis managed to do just this, "I'm sorry man, just let me go!"

"When I am through with you, there will not be a woman alive who won't scream in horror of your very existence."

While I should have acted out of a desire to save Travis' life, consideration for his survival played no role in my following decisions. There was a driving force deep in my chest that declared that there was something much more important at stake. However, until I could figure what that was, I had to keep him alive.

Pulling myself together, I dashed to Alec's side and made to loosen his hold on the drunk man's neck. The only thing I could come up with to stop him was, "It's okay, I'm okay."

Incredulously, he demanded, "you defend this filth?"

"No. But, you don't have to do this." Alec growled, but still, he wouldn't face me. Frustrated, I moved closer and his eyes flickered to mine and back to the other man. Timidly, I raised my palm to his opposite cheek and he let me gently turned his face towards me. His eyes softened as he took me in, before quickly looking over my body for any evidence that would allow him to crucify the man without my protests. Even though he was already convinced and I had no intent to deny what had happened, my objective hadn't changed. I was still prompted by for an unknown reason to delay his punishment. "Alec, please. Let's go home." The word slipped from my lips before I could think it through. The Volturi's castle…did I somehow consider it to be home?

His eyes flickered to the slouched man one more time, before he looked at me and nodded. I took my hand from his cheek, allowing his fingers to unclench. He took a genuine pleasure in destroying the man's previously arrogant composure. He'd been dying to put the man in his place; he simply needed a reason. The fear that rolled off of the centuries younger man fuelled Alec's grandiose behaviour and not quite ready to let it go, Alec used the moment to shove Travis. The man stumbled two steps backwards and hit the wall head first. He collapsed to the ground, landing roughly on the tile floor.

Allowing the violent action, I took the opportunity to deliberately walk Alec backwards a few steps and to place myself in-between the two. My palm firmly placed on his chest, his focus had shifted back to me. I twisted my fingers around a button on his shirt as if to get a better grip and keep him in place.

His hand moved to lift my chin up. I didn't fight the direction, giving in to the desire to observe the emotions hidden in his eyes. Unconsciously, I bit my lip and Alec moved a thumb to stop me.

In less of an order and more of a smoky request, "do not do that…" The moment felt like forever, but I quickly remembered our surroundings and how contrasting our actions were.

Forcing Alec to join me, I attempted to convince him, "I think he's learned his lesson." But, an unexpected interruption made this pointless.

From the floor, a hiccup and a disturbing chuckle echoed from my attacker. "Come on, man. Why don't we share?" Surely, this man had a death wish. In an abhorrently thick voice, he continued, "little minx like her, I bet she can handle the both of us just fine."

A snarl ripped from Alec's chest and the buttons of his shirt disappeared from under my fingertips. Pivoting around, I was struck by the scene before me.

Truly, I must admit that the stillness of Alec's figure would haunt me for days to come. His head was tilted as if in contemplation while a hazy mist began to engulf our captive. Travis gasped before he was sucked into a strangled silence. I could only stare on, frozen and wide-eyed at the body of his victim. An empty shell of a disturbed man on the outside. On the inside, suffering numbly, losing himself in a state of madness that caused even vampires to plead for death. Wondering if it would ever end, terrified that I never would.

I had experienced Alec's gift of sensory deprivation and its value had been made clear to me through stories of the Volturi's missions. Seeing it play out before me, however, was something different. I couldn't bring myself to pity the recipient as I began to recall my own encounter with the paralysing ability. I couldn't speak, and I thanked all the clocks in the world as it was no longer necessary for me to do so.

"Brother." Jane appeared in the doorway of the small hallway and I could feel a small weight drop from my shoulders. He would listen to Jane, allow her to ground him and expel the fury that had overtaken him. Gradually, the mist pulled away from Travis' body and he returned to the physical world that had been lost to him.

"Sister." He acknowledged her before commenting in amusement, "such excellent timing."

Jane examined the scene with dulled eyes which landed on me, then returned to her sibling. Neither responded to the moan that came from the back wall. Instead, Jane directed Alec to reorganise his responses to the elements around him. "Perhaps your ma…Saffiya should currently be your priority."

Immediately, Alec refocused on me and the deteriorating effect witnessing his gift had started to have. He stepped towards me and I blinked, finding the control that had escaped me. And just like that, I recovered from the intrusive memory. Alec released a deep breath from his chest. The exposure of his ability had backfired in a way he wasn't prepared to handle. Yet, a lack of remorse framed his face, his eagerness to follow through with his threats was undeniable. Despite the short repercussion it had forced on me.

A silent understanding passed between the twins and Alec relinquished his control of the situation, and of Travis, to Jane. "Let this be done with."

Upon hearing the finality of her decree, sealing his fate, Travis cowered away from her gaze. Her nostrils were flared and as disorienting as it was to see the merciless execution of Alec's gift, I could see how Jane's apathetically false, innocent persona had defined their reputation. Without Alec to reign her in, she was guided by the deadly sin of wrath in its purest form.

I'd be lying if I said it hadn't bothered me that not a single vampire in all the Volturi's centuries of existence had floated the idea that if they treated Jane and Alec as they did everyone else, then maybe they wouldn't present as weapons of mass destruction all of the time. Stoking the feared reputation of the twins was more important to Aro than a well-balanced and healthy environment for the youngest members of his guard. So, for as long as this remained Aro's position, neither of the twins would ever be just another member of the guard.

As much as I felt the personal need to demonise the stereotype, every time I had to remind myself that maybe they didn't need anyone but each other. The twins revelled in their sordid reputation. A fact that was clearer than ever right now and though I desired better for them, I was having trouble vilify their direct performances.

But while I still struggled to come up with an appropriate alternative, I continued to prolong the enactment of this particular plan

"Wait!" I reached out for Jane's shoulder, physically distracting her from her task. "Don't kill him."

Alec placed his hands on my upper arms and Jane raised an eyebrow at the gesture. In an attempt to sooth me, he claimed, "He deserves nothing less."

Weakly, knowing that it was a terribly understated argument and one that I had no support for, I tossed in, "but he didn't actually hurt me."

Jane spoke up, "this time." Simultaneously, the three of us turned our heads to look at the mewling form on the ground. Clearly, the twins felt that even a taste of Alec's gift was not yet enough suffering for him. Additionally, it was likely that Jane's gift would attract too much attention, especially if timed incorrectly with the shuffling of the music. The ominous statement was likely resurrected from the same hatred her brother displayed for humans. Yet, Jane's words triggered a collection of evidence in my mind.

I thought of the girl in his friend's arms and how his friend supported the bulk of her weight. I thought of how smooth Travis had been all night and contrasted it with their indelicate declarations of jubilance as we danced. Of how Alec had claimed falsities in the man's behaviour. I considered the delight on Travis' face when we talked about his dancing and his team. Recalling the importance conveyed on his competition being his last chance to prove himself.

In the interest of reparations, I could think of only one punishment that would prove suitable while also satisfying Jane and Alec's quest for a righteous justice. A permanent consequence that I may once have deemed too harsh. But that was before I discovered vampires. The ruthlessness I had been introduced to in the last few weeks had not yet effected my choices. Until I was put in a similar position of control. And suddenly, the explanation for my interference in the twins' chosen act of retribution made sense to me.

My sentencing brought a smile to Jane's face, the innocence of her appearance in direct conflict with the verdict. Though I lacked the underlying sadistic design, I supported her with a confident look of my own. A new, unrecognisable muscle movement in my face that had been absent for many years. Had I always believed in such violent standards?

I separated from in-between her and Alec and crossed the floor's distance to stand over Travis. He stared up at me with eyes full of fear and his body folded in as if to protect himself from further harm. But I saw no regret, and so I felt none. With an empty intent, I performed the sign of the cross over his chest. The hint of my humanity revealing itself in the act, as if reminding me that it was still there despite my cruel creativity.

The twins observed my process, muttering to each other. Pausing in my return to them, I picked up the end of their limited conversation.

Jane's eyes flickered to me, "Aro will be pleased."

They were talking about me. I looked up just in time to catch Alec's eyes and they burned with warring emotions.

"Aye," he agreed silently, his eyes never leaving mine.


	17. Candid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Alec and Saffiya find common ground.

**A** lec placed a hand on the small of my back, guiding me back out into the oblivious crowd. His touch sent a ripple effect through my brain, which immediately sped up my heart rate. I glanced over my shoulder to see a small smirk on his face. Prick.

He handed a ticket to the valet and I wondered if Heidi had planned for my departure to be with Alec all along. She'd flirted with the valet upon our arrival and I was sure I saw the kid quickly scrawl his number onto the back of the very card Alec passed over. I wasn't sure whether I should be impressed or embarrassed at the possibility.

We stood in silence in front of the club, on the verge of an awkward silence. Which was odd. I would've thought I'd be pulling my hair out if I'd ever had to experience what happened inside. But I wasn't and I didn't. We just stood there. Facing forward. Not saying anything. What do you say in this moment anyways? A fist bump? An obnoxious 'we showed him!' Or exactly what we were doing now? Nothing. As if it hadn't happened, as if what we had done was insignificant. As it were nothing.

Alec shrugged off his jacket and placed it over my shoulders and I allowed him to help me put my arms through. All at once, I was hit with something calming and overwhelming, in a really pleasant way. Jesus Christ. It smelled like Alec. I flinched, trying to get the thought out of my system as the car pulled up with a swerve. The valet, clearly making the most of his quick thrill in the million dollar car.

"I'm not cold?" I asked Alec in confusion. He was well aware of my inability to feel the cold and despite the whipping of the wind around us, I was unbothered and unaware of the element's affect on my body. Still, he zipped it up halfway.

"That is not why —" I raised an eyebrow at him and he sighed. "It will help lessen your...scent inside the car."

I swallowed, nodding. He avoided eye contact with me. Yet, his hand returned to my back, — under the jacket, and I could feel the pressure on my bare skin; And I think I had a 2 second mini stroke as a result just as the valet opened the passenger door of the car. I recovered quickly enough as the valet reached out to hand us the keys. Automatically, I responded and interrupted his hand-off to Alec. I looked down at the keys and could feel a grin growing on my cheeks. I'd never really driven much before. If I could just —

Apparently, Alec noticed my reaction and before I could even open my mouth, he cut in, "absolutely not."

I stuck my tongue out at him, to which he rolled his eyes and the valet hid a laugh at our routine. Alec guided me in to the sleek black Bugatti, slipped the valet a well-hidden tip, and patiently closed my door. It had hardly shut before he was sitting in the driver's seat beside me.

"How will the others get back?"

I didn't get a response until he took off from zero to thirty and I was thrust forward. His arm reached out to stop me from hitting anything except his marble-like body. I'm not sure which would be worse, but I feel like the glovebox would've left less of a bruise. He pulled off to the side of the road and demanded, "seatbelt." I wordlessly mimicked him as I turned away to do as he asked.

"Saw that."

Most of the ride back had been silent as Alec refused to respond to anything I said with more than one word. Somebody got grumpy quickly. With one hand on the wheel, I couldn't help but imagine him in a perfume commercial. The windows were only slightly open, but the wind whipped through his hair, as black as the night sky outside. He ran his free hand through it and I had to look away as my heartbeat betrayed me again.

I rested my arm on the middle console and rested my chin in my palm, staring out at the road ahead. I bit back the urge to ask my travel partner the one question I actually wanted him to answer. He'd yet to give any details about where he'd been for the last several days. Not that I needed to know, but my curiosity was driven by a more base desire.

Once we were out of the city and on the empty roads, Alec decided to change his career path and star in a real life version of the Fast and Furious movies. He pushed the car to a speed that I'm sure would make even professional race car drivers ill.

He glanced at me, probably double checking that my seatbelt was still on, as I rolled down the window and stuck my head out a few times. He may have even laughed when I shouted out the only Italian word I thought I remembered, which was strawberry; "fragola!" If he did, it was drowned out by the wind quickly suffocating me. The concept was unlikely, I convinced myself.

He was, however, forced to slow down after I'd tried to sit in the open window of the car door.

"What are — are you insane?" He barked as he pulled me back in. Though he'd slowed down, he was instantly fuming and the road was no longer his main concern. His hand was gripping my wrist, as if, if he let go, I'd try it again. I could feel myself get a little smaller, like when a child does something stupid, like run in front of a car or something. They knew it was wrong, so when they were caught they still felt guilty about it and the whole time the parent was yelling at them, they just sort of sat there, slowly tearing up but still thinking 'yeah, I did bad'. Of course, my father supported me jumping in front of cars for the insurance money when I was a kid, so I'm improvising on a normal childhood experience.

"But they do it in movies." He removed his hand from my wrist and forced himself to concentrate his anger on the steering wheel.

"Are you naive or do you simply lack the basic intelligence required to consider your own safety?"

It was a low blow, but he didn't seem to care as his ruby eyes scanned my body, crashing into my eyes. The glare he gave me before turning back reprimanded my behaviour all on its own.

My attempt at a circus act had taken his last straw and cut it into tiny little pieces. Whatever had been bothering him since we left the club was clearly more important to him than he was willing to admit. It was as if he refused to talk about what was really on his mind and decided to take his anger out on me. Well, it was more like me sitting, growing inattentive in the car and him playing through a one-sided mean girl conversation. Which, I didn't mind for a very simple reason.

As targeted as his words were, the comments felt empty. They were harsh, but, they were nothing new to what we'd argued about before. Nothing unique that he nor I hadn't already thrown in the other's face. And it was all true. Plus, all his ranting gave me enough time to come up with the perfect comeback, but I was brought back as he faltered.

"You are reckless - careless! Constantly exposing yourself to dangers you refuse to accept." His jaw locked and even from my side view, his eyes made him seem...lost? He was almost like a pitiful puppy...and I recognised that look. I think I knew where his strained anger was coming from.

Just as that discovery came to me, I forgot my comeback.

As if he'd made a simultaneous, but different, discovery of his own, he grew softer. His grip on the steering wheel loosened as he stared ahead, steely eyed and determined. Alec grunted out in a rough voice, almost as if he didn't want me to hear him but, he needed an answer. "How are you still alive?"

He stopped talking and I wasn't sure if he was done or if he were waiting for my response. What I did know — or thought I knew, was the reason he had blown up so suddenly. I considered my theory that he hadn't let our moment in the club go; The wounded puppy eyes and the fiercely stubborn attitude that gripped his body were my clues. So, pushing aside the worry that I was simply being self-centred, I struggled to think of a solid explanation for the question he wanted to ask. After all, I had chosen the bad guy, a stranger, over him.

"I thought he liked me." I mumbled and a low growl came from Alec's chest, telling me that I'd hit the nerve intended. "And you were being mean." Once I started I couldn't stop, feeling the need to make up for a decision that became a mistake, through no fault of my own. "Like you always are. And he was…nice."

"You should have listened to me."

The nuns had always taught me to 'turn the other cheek' and I was beginning to learn the difference between standing up for myself and being the bigger person. And yet…

"I get it. You were right, I was wrong. Is that what you want to hear?" I huffed and stared pointedly out my window.

He said nothing, but I could feel the car begin to slow down as if he were too focused on our conversation to drive at the same time.

I attacked again, facing away from him but wanting to make my own point. "You underestimate me."

"I believe you underestimate your importance..." I turned my head sharply back around to him before he clarified, "...to Aro. You're no use to him dead. And you're welcome."

I took a deep breath, a small shock of guilt hitting me as he did technically help me and I was raised to be annoyingly polite. However, I refused to back down. "I am grateful for your help. But, I didn't need saving."

He spoke slowly, but vehemently and there was an irrationality in it that scared me. Where Alec was involved, I recognised the same senseless gluttony in myself that he displayed at that very moment. "I will always save you."

We'd come to a complete stop in the middle of the blackened road. I was speechless for a time, the sincerity in his eyes striking me as he purposefully met mine. My chest ached as if I were starved of the unwavering, steadfast, patience that bore into my soul. Something entirely impossible, but that seemed all too real. His own eyes, ravenous and all too enticing. My mind became my heart, the two tormenting each other, obsessed with the power of total control. I was in a trance. I couldn't speak, couldn't move, but I didn't want to. I blinked and my heart rate increased tenfold, but my mind won out and I was finally able to break eye contact with him.

A blanket of silence passed over us again and I could feel his gaze still on me. I stared down at my hands, folded on my lap. After a minute, he put the car back into drive and we were soon speeding down the road once more.

I crossed my arms, stating as if to defend myself, "I was gonna punch him."

He gave a mocking laugh, though his voice lacked the viciousness it held previously. "Did you learn self-defence from a votary?" The old-fashioned term for nuns dated him, though I hardly acknowledged it.

Instead, I shook my head, raising it to stare through the windshield again. "No. My dad."

He grew quiet again. "I did not give you my condolences for your father." No, he'd been too busy making sure I didn't fall apart. We didn't dare look at each other again, but I blinked and that seemed to be enough. "Had I known the Masters' plan, I might have..." he trailed off, both of us knowing there was nothing he could've done even if he knew. The loyalty the twins displayed to the Volturi, particularly to Aro, was that of a parent to children relationship. They were the perfect children, following all the rules— be obedient, speak only when spoken to, don't question the adults.

"Isn't that what you guys do? Violence, torture…murder."

"The Masters believe in reparation and punishment as deterrents, as well as teaching tools." His face grew dark for a moment, "Jane and I know it well." This was the closest to a negative reaction I had ever seen one of the twins reveal about their father figure. He didn't dwell on the idea long and I picked up the conversation faster than he expected.

"He was all I had left. My father." Alec sighed quietly, and his hand returned to my thigh. The touch initiated the usual response in me, but it also provided the familiarity of comfort and I yearned to join my hand with his. He spoke before I could properly talk myself in or out of it.

"What about your nuns?"

I turned away, shame reverberating through me. "They lied to me." It was childish, but I was adamantly against a return to my former life. I'd never go back, even if I wasn't being held captive in a vampire "castle". It would feel false, knowing what I knew now. I needed to start over.

"Why?"

Now that I know what happened to my dad, "it might've been the difference between my father living or dying. I can't..." I'd never get over how they hid something that was so obviously important to me.

He shook his head and clarified his question, "why did they lie to you?"

"Does it matter?" I bit back. His expression didn't change as he watched the road, however, unaffected by my outburst.

He didn't challenge me, although I could see the words on the tip of his tongue. Instead, he favoured a gentler question, "don't you miss them?"

"I'll never see them again." The bitter taste in my mouth from the mere thought escaped through my words. We'd reached the bottom of the city, the streetlights shining brightly and guiding our way through the tunnels and darkness. "Best to leave things where they are. For their own safety." He knew I was referring to our previous conversation and that we'd come around full circle. In an alternative approach, Alec's thumb began to innocently move back and forth as if to provide the comfort he couldn't through words.

As we pulled up to the castle's open parking garages, I leaned forward in my seat. "I miss the stars," I whispered. The sky was so full of the bright balls of light that I found it hard to find my favourite constellations. Never before had I been so close to the stars and seen so many all at once. My view disappeared as Alec slowly pulled the car in.

I felt kind of bad for the turn of our conversation. So, I tried to make a joke to change the somber mood that had settled over us. "Maybe I'll just carry some pepper spray next time. No bodyguard needed." My joke failed and Alec's reaction was a clear indication that I should never go into comedy.

The engine turned off. His hand still rested on my thigh, inches from my knee. My words caused him to tense up, and I could feel the change from the very tip of his fingers and up through his arms. He stated darkly, "there will not be a next time."

"What are you on about?"

"It is too dangerous for you to leave the castle, again."

I scoffed, speaking before thinking. "Dangerous? The only time I've actually been hurt in the last few weeks has been inside this castle and because of you."

And we were having such a nice moment. Whoops. At least we went a short while without raising our voices or throwing our frustrations on each other. In fact, we'd been almost civil. More than civil. We'd been, dare I say…friendly.

He took a deep breath, as if trying to not lose control twice in one night. I pondered the possibility that I wasn't the only one that found friendliness more comforting than harsh tones and raised voices. If only he wasn't so darn rude. Exhibit A: "It is not up for debate."

"Maybe it should be. I bet we'd yell at each other a lot less if you just used your freaking words." Communication _is_ supposed to be the key.

"Don't be a smart ass."

I mimicked him again, repeating him words back to him as overtly childish and immature as I could. "Don't be a smart ass." So much for communication.

A deep growl ripped from his chest, "I swear to god, Saffiya—"

I blinked and he was gone. The driver's door shut and I jumped as he reappeared to open my door in exactly the same second. He was putting no effort into moving at a human speed, undoing my seatbelt and helping me out before I'd processed each action. As I stepped out, he slipped an arm under my knees and the other behind my shoulders, picking me up into his arms. I didn't have time to tell him to cut it out before we were whipped through the castle.

I was dropped gently, but not carefully onto a bed. I angrily pushed myself up and came face to face with Alec.

He was standing at the edge of the bed and my knees were inches from touching the fabric of his pants. I found it hard to breathe as I lifted my chin up, inches from his. I worried that he would hear my heart beat increasing before I scolded myself because obviously, he was probably constantly aware of it. I needed to get a handle on the devil-may-care behaviour of the organ. Maybe use a dimmer light switch but always keep the beats per minute on the lowest possible setting. Not only was it a traitor, but its' dramatic reactions to Alec's existence were basically risking my life by reminding the vampires of my current level on the food chain.

I visibly gulped and tried to avoid a repeat of our earlier staring contest when it became clear that he was not aiming for that.

No. His eyes were on my lips, which barely parted with an intake of breath as I realized this.

His eyes flickered to mine.

And the way he looked at me…

I was so screwed.


	18. Pulse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Alec and Saffiya have a talk.

His eyes would always be the first thing I noticed about him.

It was as if with every glance, every flicker of emotion that passed through them struck me in the chest like a drum. The world kept turning, there were no people frozen in time nor emptiness around us. The world merely became the background for something much more important. We could be in the middle of a battleground and the danger around us would never take precedence over the electricity that passed between us with a single look. Ben Franklin was an amateur compared to us.

Us. What was us? An unstable, unpredictable clash of two storms that had no intent on backing down. Storms, that would never give an inch but desired eighty plus. Storms that sparked lightning by simply entering the same room. I had to believe that everyone must feel this way, though it became hard to convince myself of such a fact once I realized how strange it would be if Alec were to strike such a response in all of those he encountered.

His eyes had returned to the colour of a ripe cherry and the intensity of the way he observed me made me drop my head. Butterflies raced across my chest and a flash of regret passed through my bones as I watched his shoes take a step back from the bed.

It was only moments ago that we had been in his car…Weren't we talking about something? Wasn't I mad at him?

Before I could pursue that thought, he set a pile of folded clothing on my lap.

"Change. Now." Alec ordered, an errant harshness in his tone. I flinched, refusing to look him dead on. He gave a small sigh as he took in my sensitivity, his own mind processing a better tactic. "Please." He added in a husky voice.

I nodded slowly and shifted the night clothes onto the bed. Following his orders, I moved past him to a floor length mirror and reached behind my back to try and unknot my shirt. I watched in the mirror as Alec's eyes darted around the room and anywhere that I wasn't before he coughed, "I will be right outside." I hadn't considered the taboo before I started, but I couldn't help the small smile that spread on my face at his expense until I realized my own problem.

"Wait. I err…I need help." The single string that tied neatly at the back of my waist had been double knotted by Heidi. While I was grateful for the extra insurance that no club goers would have been able to pull the string and let the shirt fall off of me, I couldn't help but scrunch my nose at a second, possibly suspicious, Heidi involved circumstance that happened to take place while I was with Alec. Although, who would have expected I'd be alone with Alec only a few hours later as I changed into his clothes and disrobed in his room. God, what was with me today?

He nodded and started towards me. I dropped my gaze down, pulling my hair over my shoulder so he could have better access to the knot. His shoes entered my field of vision and involuntarily, I met his eyes in the mirror. I patiently let out a breath I'd just barely taken in, as if to prepare myself for the pressure of his touch. His fingers hardly grazed the middle of my back but it still provoked a small gasp which I tried to turn into a sneeze. He muttered a gentle blessing for it before I felt the strings fall from their bond to hang down at my sides.

I held the top against my chest and studied him in the mirror as he retrieved the unfamiliar shirt from the bed. He handed it to me, averting his gaze the entire time. "I will be…"

"I'll call." I assured him and his eyes snapped to me, before unconsciously noticing my bare shoulder and likely the rest of my exposed back. Instead of feeling ashamed or embarrassed, as I would have expected of myself, I gave a genuine and full bodied laugh. Alec's eyes widened, realising he'd been caught.

He mumbled an adorably innocent apology before swiftly exiting the room. Wait, did I just find him adorable? And innocent?

I changed and found myself observing the walls around me. I'd never been in this room. It was smaller than the other bedchambers (a term the others sometimes used) I'd visited. I ran through them in my mind as I weighed the differences and similarities.

One wall, similar to my own room, was essentially a full bookcase. Though, it held more than books; records, old bottles, and even a few toy train sets held their own cubicles amidst the novels. A velvety, forest green, half L shaped couch rested in front of the wall and a record player claimed the top of the end table. An unlit fireplace was built into the wall beside it.

Like Heidi's room, there seemed to be a neat divide between the seating section and the bedding side, though her room had significantly more open space separating the two. In this new room, taking only a few steps from the end of the L landed you at the foot of the a more modern, canopy bed.

This was a real bed, unlike Heidi's daybed, and it had the kind of comforter that made adults want to close their eyes and fall back onto, just for that sigh of peaceful relief. My more immature self, immediately deemed it an ideal bed for pretending you were on a trampoline during an intense pillow fight. Though, I suppose using it for sleep, its intended purpose, would be nice as well.

There was another big difference. The other rooms barely included windows, presumably sticking to the original castle design. However, this room had been given a modern upgrade because the middle part of one wall was hidden behind solid velvet drapes. They began at the top, just below the ceiling and cascaded down the wall, tickling the floor. The design suggested that the window behind it covered the entire wall, but the dark of the night gave me no further clues to confirm the possibility.

Before I could investigate further, Alec knocked. I granted him entry and gave him a small smile as I stood awkwardly in the middle of the room.

He froze upon seeing my new attire. His gaze trailed over the oversized shirt and as I began to play with the ends of the fabric, it caused his focus to snap down to my bare thighs. I frowned, unsure of what he could be looking at. The shorts were a reasonable length, just a few inches longer than the shirt that hung loosely off of my shoulders. I realized my naivety only a moment later.

Catching himself staring, he moved to the bedside table and undid the V necklace that always rested on his chest. I was surprised he'd ever take it off, but it also revealed the main question I'd failed to consider while playing investigator.

"This is your room." I stated and he nodded, sort of amused by my wonderment.

"Yes." He set the crest down respectfully and stepped towards me, watching as I still surveyed his room. Alec seemed slightly hesitant to be giving me full reign in it, so I made sure not to actually touch anything. Rooms were intimate things for people and I wanted to respect that for him.

I tried to hide my still growing curiosity at the intricacies in the room, delivering a tease to help ease any worries he had about my presence. "And I thought my room was extravagant." It was. My Victorian style room was a little girl's dream and nearly twice the size of Alec's. I preferred his.

He chuckled at my comment and my fears of intrusion became irrelevant. "You may sit, if you like." He nodded his head to the couch and, feeling on the verge of awkward, I did so with a quiet,

"Thanks." So good, so far. With high hopes for a positive conversation, I inquired, "where did the clothes come from?"

"Heidi chose them." Of course she did.

"Does she have something to do with the eviction from my room?"

"She is redecorating it, personalising it." He leaned against the end of his bed, where I'd been sitting several minutes ago. "Don't tell her I told you. She wanted it to be a surprise."

"I thought that was already done…you know, after I destroyed it." He smirked, furthering my embarrassment from my first night. Though, two could play at that game. "Which was partly your fault."

"I am not the one that broke a 200 year old vase."

Defending myself, I revealed, "that vase deserved it."

A genuine smile began to show on his face and I found one growing on mine as a result. He pointed out, "it's an inanimate object?"

"Yeah, a pointless one." He chuckled under his breath at my high-spirited behaviour.

I gestured to his bed, feeling more comfortable as we settled into the natural rhythm of a calmer, happier version of our arguments. The quick, high-energy, back and forth we usually entertained in a negative context translated into a genuine, balanced, and witty conversation during a positive interaction. But good things must be tested if they are to endure. "Are vampires able to sleep at all?" I knew they didn't have to, but with all the beds they must have had the ability to.

"We do not."

"Then, why do you have a bed?" I had asked Heidi and Demetri the same question and they offered up different reasons as to why they appreciated the access to one. Though they did have one thing in common. The realization hit me only seconds after he raised an eyebrow at my question.

My eyes widened before I looked away. "Oh." I felt a slight tug at my heart, which I forced back like a vial of cough syrup. I'd never even considered Alec partaking in such activities when the others would joke about being the vampires without mates. But it made complete sense. After all, he was some hundred years old. He'd probably met loads of women. And why would I care. It's not like I was interested in him that way. It was a silly notion.

He seemed to realise where my mind had gone and quickly fought to dismiss the theory. "It helps me think. Sometimes." Though his new theory was somewhat half baked, the embarrassment flooding off of him was enough to make me giggle and it may have been the first real laugh I'd ever shared with Alec.

He coughed quickly noticing this and I found myself missing the sound of his laughter. Ever the professional, he sought to continue briefing me on how Heidi's plan was to unfold.

"You are to sleep here tonight." It was my turn to raise my eyebrows and for him to stumble once more over his words to untangle himself past the incidentally suggestive statement. "Jane's room would have been an option, except that she's a habit of leaving it in a terribly disastrous state." His nose crinkled in distaste of his sister's messy style.

I envied their sibling relationship. I'd always been alone and I was generally fine with that. I usually had my dad or someone else to turn to. But, the twins had something more, something deeper and exquisitely profound. Maybe it was just a 'twin thing'. A bond that was made even stronger through their endurance of time and all the challenges and pain it had given them. All the loss of hope and youth taken from them, as time does. Still, their immortality provided them with a gift worth all the rest. They would forever have each other to stand by and to share with. They would never be alone, again. I hated being alone.

Cross-checking what I knew about sibling relationships in general, I inferred, "I suppose she accuses you of being too clean?"

He crossed his arms and rolled his eyes. He did this with such petulance that it exposed his humanity. "I happen to enjoy being able to see my floor."

I couldn't hide the grin on my face, and his eyebrows lifted as he examined my response. "It's not what I expected," I admitted. "Your room."

"What did you expect?"

I gave the question a thought, before answering. "I don't know…Hamlet skulls?"

Alec gave a soft laugh and tilted his head, giving credit where credit was due. In this case, "untidy as she is, Jane had an 'interior design' phase a decade or so ago. She allowed me to choose a colour, but the rest is all her. And Heidi, her conspirator."

I watched him as he talked about Jane's brief passion and the result of her dedication. He had turned away from me, now looking around his room and appreciating it in the context of his sister. His eyes sparkled with a light that never woke without his twin's presence. I found myself never wanting to see that light go out, to be a lighthouse for the nights when the dark seemed emptiest. Was this what it was to never be alone? For even when the twins were apart, the memory of one still sparked the best in the other. "Eventually, her interests changed. But, she has a talent for it."

I nodded subtly and silently in agreement with him. And as he admired the room, I took the moment to admire him.

I'm not sure when I stopped being terrified of his very nature and started leaving the door to my mind unlocked for him to open at anytime. I couldn't tell you what caused the exact beat at which my heart diverted from its' fast paced fearful rhythm into an intoxicated flurry of action. Although, I cannot say with certainty that fear was not a part of this transition; Only that I was no longer afraid of him.

Somehow it had gotten to the point where I had no second thoughts about asking him to basically help me undress; A point where I didn't question why his room was the one I was to sleep in. It had to be the same period of time where I started wanting to spend more time with him, even if we were taunting each other. Where I started to seek out excuses for picking small fights because it left me reeling and full of energy. Or perhaps it was after that, when I started glancing at doors with the hope that he would enter the room and experienced a strange disappointment when he did not.

The same dangers were still present — his vampirism left him constantly craving the blood in my veins, the la tua cantante thing made it even harder for him to not give in to this craving, and as a result, my death could always be seconds away without anyone ever realising it.

But if you asked me right now if I thought he wanted to kill me…I would hesitate to answer.

"Alec?" He turned back to me, his hair falling into place. Ebony locks favoured the right side of his head, as he'd run his hand down the middle out of mere habit. The gentle curl framed his face and I swear to you, it was the business formal of bed head.

"I don't want to fight with you anymore."

He was quiet for a long time.

Finally, he swallowed, as if unsure of how to begin his next sentence. As if wanting to make it perfect, for fear of muddying the translation of his thoughts. "I would like to apologise for how I have treated you these last few weeks…and tonight as well." I struggled to keep my mouth closed and to not let my jaw drop out of the sheer implausibility of the statement. He was looking patiently into my eyes and I wanted to give him no reason to stop. "It took the few days that I was…away to clear my head and I am sorry that it has taken me so long."

"Where did you go?" He gave me an exasperated look and I zipped my lips guiltily. He took a breath before continuing.

"It has been unfair of me to allow my frustrations to pass on to you." This was a top-notch apology. I couldn't help but question the legitimacy of it, but it was difficult to cast any ounce of doubt on his sincerity. Was it possible that time had lessened the integrity of apologies? "I will strive to respect your decisions and to contain my temper when I do not agree with them."He stopped talking, his eyes flickering over me for any sign of a negative reaction.

Still, I waited until I was sure he had finished. "I haven't exactly made it easy for you."

"No, you have not." He chuckled, running a hand through his hair with three shakes. "But, I hope that you can forgive me. And that one day you might consider me a friend."

I believe it was the most I had heard, or probably let, him talk continuously at any point since I'd met him. The guys had said he barely opened his mouth before I arrived, aside from the general greeting of the masters and the occasional snark or teasing gesture meant to rile up the guard members. All in jest, but never anything that revealed his personal thoughts or opinions on any one matter. He was a soldier, but there are days when soldiers do not fight.

I considered his proposition. Though it sounded more like a loose suggestion for a future event, I weighed the possibility of preparing for the opposite. We may have had all the time in the world, but I couldn't imagine spending one more day as anything but the future. "How does today, sound?"

He was taken aback, firmly questioning my methods. "Today?"

I stood from the couch and took the few steps to stand in from of him. I held out my hand and he stared at it. "Hello, Alec. It's nice to be your friend today." I forced, or rather strongly encouraged him to shake my hand. They were soft in spite of the marble-like structure of his body and I tried to ignore how they seemed to fit securely with mine.

The especially normal action made him seem out of place. "This is ridiculous," he grumbled, though he was not unwilling to entertain my motive in partaking in the physicalisation of the agreement we were making. It was unusual, yes, but the uniqueness held a fair bit of entertainment.

I shook my head avidly, pouting and critiquing his word choice. "Now you say…"

He rolled his eyes, but the corner of his mouth quirked upward and he replied with a plastered smile, "Hello Saffiya. You too." I shook my head and mouthed the words at him, as if they were pre-scripted in anything but my own mind. "It's nice to be your friend today."

I grinned, allowing our hands to fall, though still locked together. We stood still there for a moment and Alec stared down at my hand in his and his in mine. I released his hands as casually as I could. "And all it took was a handsome stranger in a club…" Alec growled lowly. "Too soon?"

"You truly are—"

"The most amazing friend in the whole world?" His eyes narrowed as I added onto my previous poke at his sensitive mood. I giggled, and it took him a second to catch up. His face shifted to give me a half-hearted glare at the quip, as if resigning himself to the fact that this would almost certainly be our new game. My giggles continued as I declared, "this is going to be so much fun."

He groaned in good humour, laying backwards onto his bed. I lifted myself to sit on the edge of it, resting my cheek on my shoulder to gaze down at him. His eyes were closed upon impact and if I didn't know any better, I'd have sworn he had fallen asleep before he moved again. Almost immediately, his hand found the ends of my hair and he twisted them around his fingers in a gentle tug. I was thrust back to the night he'd first done this and how comforting it had been. Now, it seemed that comfort was joined by the exact opposite, destabilising the heartbeat that had just started to rest.

"I owe you an apology as well. I said some kinda mean things too." He listened, though he seemed a bit more focused on the movements of his fingers in my hair. "Also, I think I hit you once."

Ruby eyes fluttered open and he interrupted me, as I had done to him. "And you threw your shoe at me."

I scoffed, "I stand by that. Anyways, I missed." I tapped a thoughtful finger to my chin, adding, "but I am sorry for saying you looked like a boy band wannabe."

"You said what?"

My voice raised half an octave as I tried to play it off, "Oh, did I never say that out loud before?" He fixed me with a playful glare and I fumbled to find the perfect witty response, which only increased the energy sparked by his taunt. It was only a matter of time before he jumped on my next move, or made his before I could recover. Which I didn't — recover, that is. At least, not in the way I meant to because I blurted out:

"You gave me a hickey!"

The boy's eyes widened at the reminder, and the childish glee on his face was replaced by a smirk. And suddenly we weren't just having a laugh and messing around. Suddenly, the air grew thick and his eyes once again glanced to my lips. Something was stuck in my throat and I couldn't release the breath held in my chest.

At the pace of molasses, his hand found its' way from the ends of my hair to my hand that supported my weight on the bed. Alec gave my wrist a tug, moving it out from under me and encouraging gravity to let me fall back on the bed as he countered the movements. His other hand found my other wrist and he pinned them both to the soft fabric of the comforter beneath us.

He hovered over me, effectively trapping me between him and the mattress. I frowned and tried to move my hands to no avail. Even despite his strong hold, he seemed to be supporting himself so as not to put any more weight than necessary on them. His chest barely brushed mine as I tried to twist out of his grip once more. Embarrassed, I looked anywhere but at him until I felt a rush tickle my skin at his touch. Alec's hand trailed across my forehead, brushing my hair out of my face.

Inside, I was a wreck. I couldn't even feel my heart and I was getting oxygen but there was no way I was breathing. All I could do was look up at him and wait for his next move. He was taking his sweet time in doing whatever it was.

Alec's gaze focused on my lips before his eyes trailed over my jaw and across my cheekbones. I blinked profusely before he caught my eyes with his, for what must have been the hundredth time that night. The vampire's thumb ran over the dip in my collarbone, exactly where he'd marked my skin previously. Two fingers tapped this spot on my neck before pressing lightly to feel my pulse, only an inch away, which was no doubt running a marathon of its own.

Alec's cheek brushed my jaw and his lips grazed my ear. I felt his breath tickle my skin and in a low voice, "I stand by that one."

_Holy_

"Fuck." I exhaled and my eyes widened as the unfamiliar curse word slipped from my lips. Alec seemed extremely satisfied with himself and in a single flash, he was laying on his back once more.

I sat up quickly, taking in short, deep breaths as my heart thundered in my chest. I pushed my hair out of my face, trying to walk myself through exactly what just happened.

"You're right. This will be fun." I turned to look at him over my shoulder, but he pretended not to notice. He was gazing up at the ceiling with an arm casually folded under his head and the only sign that anything had occurred was the small remnants of a satisfied smirk.

Without a second thought, I reached back for a pillow and smacked him with it. His jaw dropped and his head moved back and forth between me and the offending object. A bunch of giggles broke free from my chest at Alec's face.

"Whoops."

Alec's eyebrows narrowed at me in a familiar style, sizing me up as I laughed at his expense. He reached for another pillow and before I could react, I was struck with the match of my own weapon. As my hair tangled itself with only one hit, I immediately pushed it off of my face and I was sure it had a similar expression to the one I'd inspired on Alec's with my first attack. It was his turn to gloat, his laugh light and as carefree as he'd ever been. It seemed almost an impossible sight.

And to my delight, another attack from my pillow did nothing but increase the purity of it and I was sure that nothing else would ever sound as lovely to me as his laughter.

"Seriously though, when's your next album drop?"


	19. Yarn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we play catch up with Saffiya's life in the Volturi.

" **N** ow, I see it."

"What do you see?"

Alec's question announced his return from the unexpected meeting that had called him away not too long ago. I sensed his presence as he came to stand behind me, but I was so lost in thought that I'd not processed his question. I was too busy staring up at a portrait that hung above the fireplace mantle and noting that it was similar to the one I'd seen of Alec during my 'tour'.

I was standing in the common room that connected Jane and Alec's bedrooms. Normal siblings shared a Jack and Jill suite. These two immortal vampires each had a marvellously decorated room to themselves and enjoyed a common area the size of a church. It was no wonder they hadn't formed stronger bonds through the years with the other guard members. They had no need to share the training or game room because they had their own personal one complete with a grand piano in the very center of their common area.

Heidi was taking her time redoing my room, which had left me to camp out in the twin's common room and more specifically, in Alec's room. The siblings and I had settled into an irregular routine that ended with nights where we'd read books, play board games, watch movies, or play Dance Dance Revolution on their television. A game that I was becoming rather fond. Eventually, Jane would retire to her room or other duties and Alec would insist that I had a bedtime.

I only seemed to leave the suite when neither of the twins were guarding me. Felix or Demetri would pick me up at the door and we would relocate to another room. Sometimes, transporting the mat for DDR. (That's right. I use abbreviations now.) Although I hadn't seen the Prank Kings since they left for a mission a few days ago, and we'd parted on a bit of a rocky slope for one very simple reason;

I, kind of — sort of...went rogue.

They kept telling me that their so called, 'greatest prank ever' was almost ready. When I offered my services to make it move faster, the two insisted I had done the only part I could. But nothing happened and they were dodging any curiosity I showed in regards to the subject of pranking. I was cooped up in this stupid castle and I wanted to have some fun. After persistent nagging on my part about when exactly they planned on putting it on, they finally admitted the plan was on hold for creative reasons. Apparently, the timing had to be perfect. In an attempt to compensate, Felix assigned me yet another 'task' to make a list of the people I thought would be suitable pranking targets.

And yes, they were on the top of the list.

Unfortunately for them, they had opened the door to the prank world for me and left the door unlocked without proper supervision. Unable to still my growing curiosity and excitement on the subject, I happened to spill the beans on the whole production to Jane, whose eyes lit up like a Christmas tree.

The guys had mentioned that some of the vamps had limits when it came to the pranks they'd pull. What they had failed to mention was that involving the twins was a hard limit; The importance of not involving the twins.

And it was apparently, a castle wide standard. Jane and I had been giggling over possible pranks as she gave me examples of common, every-day pranks. Our laughter attracted Heidi's suspicion and as the word 'prank' slipped from my lips, her eyes went wide. Heidi got our attention face on once we'd settled and she pointed a finger at us. She wagged it at us with the bossiness of a new babysitter that was quickly realising they had very little control over what happened next. Her confidence dissipated when Jane and I responded with false innocence, so she later complained to the Kings of Pranks. This led to Felix pulling me aside one day to give me an unnecessarily theatrical storytelling of the strangely sensitive topic.

According to Felix, the twins had gone through a phase in their younger years where they terrorised the guard, and even the masters, with pranks that nearly 'crossed the delicate pranking line between comedy and mean-spirited actions'. Felix's words — not mine. I have no doubts that he utilised a fair bit of embellishments throughout the rest of his story.

He claimed that the main problem was that Jane and Alec had no limits. Once the Volturi rose to power, Aro began spoiling the siblings rotten and their value to the coven allowed them to do whatever they pleased — right down to torturing other guard members with no real reason. Their discovery of the game of pranks provided them with a proper outlet for their remaining immaturity. Having also never partaken in such activities in their prior life, their 'reign of terror' was the only way they knew how to have fun. They weren't able to recognise or find concern in the fact that they were the only ones doing so. Behaviour that built into their growing reputation.

Eventually, members of the guard began to retaliate until Aro announced his only rule for the twins. They were not allowed to engage in any pranking or related activities — 'unless fired upon first'. Felix's retelling had begun to sound like an increasingly intense game of paintball by the time he made his point.

Felix coughed, puffing his chest out to make himself seem more accountable. "The point is — the twins are trapped in a pranking cease fire." He attempted to lower his already deep voice, moving with robotic-like movements. His attempts to keep my attention and relay his message had failed from the moment he sat me down for 'a little history lesson'. In that moment, I had experienced the same level of second-hand embarrassment that schoolchildren did when their teacher tried to rap out their lesson plans. "If you were to come in, it would be their loophole to start an all out war." I raised my eyebrows at the seriousness with which he spoke.

"But that sounds like fun."

"Balloons are fun. Dying Corin's clothes pink is fun. The twins don't stop at fun." He had shuddered, which made me giggle, which in turn made Felix's face turn grave. He took hold of my shoulders to get through to me as he instructed, "as your elder, Saffiya, under no circumstances, are you to engage in the discussion, action nor thought of pranking with either of the twins."

Within that same week, both Chelsea and Demetri had approached me separately with similar concerns. But the more I was told no, the more I did the exact opposite and Jane was all too happy to comply. This time, she was older and didn't need to pull pranks geared towards humiliating or negatively effecting others. Plus, she had me and we were in it for the laughs and good fun all around. Jane and I had covered our bases with solid ideas and we would be able to defend our plans against any one of Felix's assertions.

By the time Caius summoned me to the masters' study one afternoon, I was prepared. Mentally pushing aside my own grievances with the man, I offered him a deal; Allow the twins and I to prank to our hearts' contents in return for full immunity and all access — including a heads up and veto power on all pranks Jane and I were to put into action.

To my immense surprise, he agreed.

Jane and I started small, with Demetri and Felix as our test subjects, so that I could get my bearings before we committed to anything big. Also to keep a low profile until we got to the real stuff. We had a few failed attempts. Like when I smashed a lemon inside Felix's shower head hoping to test my theory that it might, at the very least, sting their eyes. Instead, he came out smelling freaking amazing. Seriously, it was like a delicious candle in the summertime. Lemon. Who'd have thought.

She did insist on limiting Alec's participation in our shenanigans, briefly stating that he lacked the ideal medium between going too big and too small for pranks. I didn't question it, grateful to spend the time alone with her. I was getting a little tired of losing at chess.

Distracted with the brewing prank war, my looming and still unknown death date, and my newfound friendship with Alec, I'd stopped keeping track of the days I'd spent with the Volturi. Days grew into weeks and one month became two and it didn't seem to matter at that point. Plus, I always asked the receptionist the date, but they had just hired a new woman. The new one was not as nice as What's-Her-Name. What's-Her-Name had sweeties on her desk just for me. And when I'd pulled my first amateur prank on Demetri, one that Jane defined as 'overdone but always a laugh', What's-Her-Name let me hide under her desk. But when I asked the new chick for help, she just stared back at me. Which was just rude...unless she just didn't speak English. Something I had not considered until now.

Either way, she didn't have any candy and that was the true crime.

It just so happened that Jane and I had begun planning our first real and original prank when she, Alec, and all my other guards were summoned to a meeting in the throne room this morning.

There had been an abundance of these meetings occurring within the last week. They increased after a single lower guard member returned from a mission sans the two companions he had left with. He told a harrowing story of being forced to watch as their attackers ripped Killian, a younger guard member, limb by limb and burned him. He'd been helpless as they dragged his other partner away; Elizabeth, whom he presumed dead.

Though she had shown the most contempt for me, I had a general concern for Elizabeth's survival. I preferred to focus on the part of the story where the surviving guard had not seen her die. Thinking deductively, it was obvious to me that if they planned on killing her, they would have done it at the same time as they did Killian. But, I was also smart enough to recognize that my opinion was not of interest to the Masters and so I kept my mouth shut.

I gathered more information after catching soundbites from small conversations here and there. I'd put together that they believed it to have been a choreographed attack. Someone had specifically targeted the Volturi and left one alive to pass on the message. What the message was exactly, I was still unclear on.

The meetings seemed to increase the intensity of the guard and I wasn't left alone for even a millisecond. During the meetings with the higher guards, I was practically locked in a single room guarded by four members of the middle ranking guards. Feeding time left me in a similar predicament, only the lock on my door was to keep my temporary guards out — just in case. While a lock wouldn't stop them when they were at their most famished, I had no doubt that they feared the wrath of Aro and the twins more than they craved a single human. I was, however, still warned not to do a single thing that might possibly end with my blood being spilled.

It wasn't the first time I was left alone in the twin's common room with nothing to do, but this time, as I had done maybe a few weeks ago in Alec's room, I decided to take a closer look around.

I'd ventured over to the far wall, the one part of the room we never spent much time in. Mainly because it consisted of a large meeting table, a single bookshelf and a fireplace whereas we spent most of our time on the much more comfortable couches and in front of their television. The two seemed to share an aversion to this side of the room, particularly of the fireplace itself. Obviously they had no need for it and it was better for me to stay away from fireplaces to avoid the possibility of overheating. So, my exploration gave me the opportunity to view a painting just above the mantle of the fireplace.

A woman I'd never seen before centred the portrait and Aro was seated in an identical throne on her right. Alec and Jane stood on either side of the two adults. They were all garbed in 17th century clothing — Volturi style. The crest of their coven stood out proudly around each of their necks. It seemed that family portraits were not only a human indulgence.

The unfamiliar woman had a beauty surpassing even that of Heidi's and though her mouth was set in a straight line, there was a firm gentleness to her. Jane and Alec had identical empty faces, while the tiniest of smiles stood out as a signature contrast on Aro's face. Alec had a hand on Aro's shoulder, the role of the dutiful son. The rumbling of a husky voice behind me required that I, once again, make the conscious decision to tear my eyes away from the ruby gaze the artist had managed to capture in the boy.

"What do you see, vita?" Alec further questioned my intended lonely, rhetorical statement in a dulled voice with mumbled Italian words. He often returned from these meetings less than bright, but his eyes were scanning the portrait as I had been. My attention, however, suddenly became much more focused on his proximity to me. My shoulders were inches from his chest and I tensed to keep myself still, conscious of what would happen were we to make contact for even the briefest of seconds.

This awareness was not an uncommon occurrence over the last few weeks. Alec had a habit of slyly brushing a hand against my arm, my hand, or my leg, almost as if to check that I was really there. At least, that was the purpose at first.

Every time his skin touched mine, my heart jumped into my throat. It never adjusted to the act and the quick shock through my system was a surprise every time. I think it became a bit of a game to him because he'd time out taps on my skin with whatever non active activity we were doing. And although it amused Jane at first, the fact that I couldn't remember more than a few details after a marathon of our favourite tv series' drove her mad after a few days.

Alec didn't care much when Demetri and Felix began to take notice, until he realised that their winks and sly commentary was distracting me from fully responding and engaging in his unruly game.

The thing about being friends with Alec, as I had come to discover, was that the guy loved to mess with those around him. As often as Jane used her powers, Alec seemed to find more pleasure in witty remarks and snarky comments. Occasionally, he'd make a particularly funny one and any amount of laughter from present company at a successful joke spurred more unsuccessful ones. I'd laughed at a few of them until I realized Jane looked ready to explode at him, so I began hiding my amusement in my shirt or under coughs. He never did give up, though. So, whether he was trying to be funny or not was still on the table.

He did have his days. He'd have moments where he'd grow silent and brooding instead of his usual silent and observant aura. The amount of patience and discipline instilled in him was astounding. I'd learned from watching Jane that just continuing on and letting him wallow by himself resulted in overturning his mood more often than not. But sometimes, I would earn a small crack in the hard exterior by giving someone bunny ears, making silly faces, or engaging in other harmless, childish mischief.

It wasn't practical, that our tumultuous relationship could be flipped upside down with a single handshake. Was it really so easy to turn heated arguments into shared laughter? For whatever reason, we'd been able to pull it off so far. Still, the energy that passed between us, no matter what state or mood we were in, was always 100%. And I wasn't quite sure how I felt about that.

I hadn't had time to sort out why Alec was able to cause this sort of response in me. The amount of space he occupied in my mind on a daily basis drove me crazy and clearly my heart couldn't take it. I had programmed myself to always hope for the best, but to expect the least. I was very aware of every worst case scenario that this situation could end in. For now, though, it was fun. And that was enough.

I could feel his eyes on me, naturally, unconsciously before he turned to also gaze up at the portrait. The meeting had certainly set up the potential for him to catch a moody vibe. But there was a difference in his moodiness when we were with others and when we were alone. Instead of me actively trying not to piss him off or distract him, he found his own ways to calm himself down.

It was almost like clockwork that once his gaze left me, I felt a familiar tug on my hair. His fingertips brushed my skin and I found myself leaning in to it, as easy as that. Long fingers found company untangling the ringlets at the base of my neck and sliding down to the ends of my hair. It was an action he performed almost unconsciously, and never in the company of others. An action too intimate to even be put into words, let alone shared with others.

I couldn't help but wonder if maybe these weren't things that normal friends did.

His touch seemed to disappear as quickly as it had come and with it, the serenity of absolute contentment.

Clearing my throat, I finally answered him, "I understand why Felix refers to the Volturi as royalty."

He considered the idea and I could almost hear him smirking with pride. "I suppose. In the vampire world."

Referencing the portrait once more, I informed him, "I don't recognize her." Alec took a seat at the head of the meeting table, twirling the chair around to examine the portrait.

He dropped his head to the side in acknowledgement before tapping his fingers lightly on the table. His fingers moved fluidly, as if he were pressing keys on a piano."Sulpicia." He offered no further explanation or details, famous for one word answers as if I could read his mind. I'd called him on it several times, so he knew it mildly irritated me. Now, every time he did it, it seemed to be just to rile me up. Even if it wasn't always the case.

I noticed the hand Aro rested on the woman's knee. "Who is she?"

"Aro's wife."

I laughed softly until the look Alec gave me made it clear that he was not making a joke. "Aro has a wife?"

He nodded, not quite picking up what had amused me. "The Master's wives remain in the tower."

"Why haven't I met them?"

"Their control is not as developed, as they spend very little time with humans." He halted in his table playing before continuing, "Jane has told me they look forward to meeting you, especially seeing how fond Jane is of you."

Nodding, "I heard that was unexpected." He didn't acknowledge my comment and I turned away from the painting to see his head down. He was studying the table with a conflicted intensity.

"As Aro's mate, Sulpicia may as well have raised Jane and me." Joining him at the table, I made sure he could see that I was giving him my full attention to encourage him to continue. It was rare that he shared tidbits about his earlier life. I'd been told nothing of his human experience, but he sometimes provided unexpectedly angsty opinions about historical figures or to provide an addendum to the sagas told by our recurring companions. I never pried any further than what was shared, that same warning from Marcus still loitering in the back of my mind.

His eyes moved to the portrait and I mimicked him. My focus rested on the entwined hands of Sulpicia and Jane. "She would never replace our mother, but she, and Aro, have been good to us." We rested there in silence, letting his reveal sink in for both of us before I started up again to keep his mood from slipping.

"What is a mate?" Like I said. I took care not to pry into his past.

However, this question didn't seem to be one he wanted to go into either. As soon as the words left my mouth, he visibly took in a sharp, unneeded breath and held it in. He was frozen staring at the painting. He raised his shoulders in a timid reluctance, finally answering my question.

"A mate is a vampire's partner. Their soulmate, if you will." I opened my mouth to scoff at the term but thought better of it. I don't think Alec noticed, appearing to be in deep contemplation.

"So, the guard members in relationships, are all mates?"

"Chelsea and Afton," he named two other pairs in the lower guard, but took me by surprise with the last pairing, "Prosper and Elizabeth—"

"Prosper and Elizabeth?"

"Aye." Old-timer. "This surprises you?"

I tried to form words to describe the dynamic I couldn't process. "He's just so...gentle...and she's so cold."

Alec nodded in thought before sharing evidence that opposed my belief. "He became barbaric once he learned of her disappearance. Felix had to restrain him." He pursed his stone lips, "Prosper believes she is still out there."

"Do you?"

He shrugged, continuing on about his fellow guard member, giving me more detail than I'd managed to catch. I assumed that with all the information, this must have been the topic of their most recent meeting. "For his safety, Aro has confined him to the castle — an attempt to keep him from trying to find her." My heart went out to Prosper, believing that I could only imagine what he must be going through.

Another thought came to me, "are you still sour on him?"

He smirked, shooting back at me, "was Elizabeth still unfavourable toward you?"

With no qualms, I answered straight out, "relentlessly. Maybe I should ask Prosper why?" I chuckled emptily, not actually planning on acting so selfishly when he was so distressed.

It seemed Alec did still have some harsh feelings against Prosper because he provided me with an immediate answer. "She holds you responsible for Prosper's injuries after your first escape."

I raised my eyebrows, "you mean the injuries you caused?" He waved me off, as if it made no difference. Refraining from rolling my eyes in annoyance, I huffed, "what kind of messed up logic is that?"

With a more serious tone, he told me that "mates can often be irrational when it comes to their match." Nonchalantly, he continued, "being human, she already regarded you with slight contempt."

I scoffed, "yeah, yeah, let's just blame humanity." None of them seemed to recall the fact that they were also human once. Whether it was a lack of control on their part or simply an irrational dislike for humans, many of the guard were either polite from afar or they completely ignored me. While Heidi had certainly warmed up to me, I think she agreed to be my handler only when she sought entertainment. Or when Demetri was around. Their flirty banter had always been amusing, but with my new information about mates, I understood why it never seemed to be anything more. A thought occurred to me and though I knew it may test Alec's patience, I proposed it anyways. "If you had killed Prosper, would that irrationality have made her...you know...'seek revenge'?"

He actually laughed. "She wouldn't dare."

"Not on you," I clarified. His head whipped to me and flames danced in his eyes.

"No one will ever lay a finger on you. I promise you." My stomach fluttered.

I continued my questionnaire, taking advantage of the fact that for some reason he was more than willing to answer everything I was asking. "What will happen to Prosper — if she really is...dead?"

He paused for a moment, as if it was painful for him to even consider. "Some broken mates choose death." He stopped once more to gather himself. "Others continue on, though I cannot imagine their demeanour would be much different from Marcus'."

"What do you mean?"

"Marcus' mate, Aro's sister, was murdered. An act against the Volturi."

My mind was racing with all this new information, details into the personal touches of what made the masters' tick. Aro's sister was Marcus' wife? And they never found her killer? It didn't seem possible that the Volturi, supposedly the most powerful coven in the world, would be unable to find the vampire that murdered someone so important, so high up in their hierarchy.

"What was her name?"

He looked back up at the portrait and muttered sadly, "Didyme." I thought of Marcus. The sweet, extremely old man that had been so kind to me at the beginning. Even if he'd insisted that I be constantly surrounded by mean Alec. It wasn't right. Someone like him...he didn't deserve such a horrible tear in his life. But then, who did really? "Mates are for life. We only get one chance." His eyes flickered to mine and he watched me, as if he wanted to say more.

I, too, bit my tongue, too cowardly to ask if he had found his mate and too afraid of the answer.

His hand found my cheek lifting my head up to look at him. I knew he was supposed to feel cold, but all I felt was the smooth, uncalloused palm of his hand and the tips of his fingers on the side of my face. No cold, no warmth. Just him. He whispered something in Italian as he studied my face. "Cuore…vita…", but to be honest, I could only make out every few works and despite the few Italian lessons Demetri had actually offered, it still sounded like mumbled gibberish to me.

A second later, the double doors to the common room creaked open and a sweet voice chimed out, "my turn to play with the human!" Somehow, Jane managed to make the normally demeaning term sound like an endearing nickname.

Alec stood abruptly and I jerked back in my own chair at the act. She paused as she took in our position and smirked, before practically skipping over to us. I could feel the smile on my face widen the closer she got. I'd never really had a friend, especially not one my age. I'd spent most of my life with my father around adults and though I had made friends with the children that took Sunday mass at the convent, it was never anything like what Jane and I shared. As close as I was with the others, there was something different about having a girl that understood me. Alec, however, was another story entirely.

Jane kissed her brother on the cheek in greeting and took both my hands, pulling me quickly to my feet. "Sleepover party!" She was grinning eagerly and I couldn't help but match her energy, even if I had no idea what she was talking about.

I giggled at her excitement, "Jane we've practically been having sleepovers every night."

Denying my claim, she corrected it, "a real sleepover. No boys!" I tilted my head in a mix of amusement and confusion and Alec added in to the conversation.

"Jane will be your guard for the next two days."

"We're going to put every sleepover movie to shame." She dropped my hands as she had a thought attack, "We need movies! And games!" Jane declared, flashing over to the other side of the room. She opened up the cupboard under the television and began searching for activities she deemed worthy of the event.

Alec was watching after his sister in amusement and I looked up at him over my shoulder. "You're leaving again," I commented, unable to keep the disappointment from trickling into my voice. Alec's lips curled up in a slight smirk at the vulnerability I displayed.

"I must. Felix and Demetri require my assistance."

I rolled my eyes playfully, "oof, sucks for you." It was his turn to roll his eyes at me.

Jane called me over, pulling us from our conversation. "Saffiya, come here." I obeyed, leaving Alec to join her on the floor. She placed her arms behind her back and faced me. "Right or left?"

I tapped her right bicep, "right."

She pulled two DVD cases out from behind her back. The one I'd chosen was a film and the other looked like the case to a violent video game that I had to admit, grew on me the more I watched her play it. "Looks like we're starting with 'Magic Mike'."

Alec frowned, examining the cover of the DVD from his standing position. "Are those not Heidi's film sets?"

Jane shot me a look to mock her brother before informing him of her plan in a matter of fact tone. "Yes. Saffiya is from the 21st century, yet four of the last five films we've all watched were from the 40's and 50's."

"I like Marilyn Monroe!" I defended myself.

Mocking me, Jane declared, "we're going to be normal teenagers and watch half naked men dance and…actually I think that's it."

This detail of the film seemed to be a hard line for Alec. With a firm voice, he denounced the plan, "absolutely not."

"I agree, Jane. It sounds a bit…pornographic?" Maybe I was a bit of a prude, but I had lived with women 'married to God' when I first started noticing boys. There was no way anything like this movie would have been included in the nun's movie collection.

She shrugged, "I have no idea, I've never seen it. But Heidi suggested it," she addressed Alec as if to convince him and get his permission to let us watch it. But, it was very clear that she wasn't giving him a real vocal input on the decision. "This is a normal experience for 16 year olds, so would you rather it be me or Heidi that she watches something like this with?" Alec frowned, pursing his lips at his sister's bossiness.

Scoffing, I picked up the case. "What are you guys, my parents?" I flipped over to the back of the case, scanning the description. The content was highly adult, but Jane was right. It was the closest I'd probably ever get to a normal teenager's movie viewing experience. "I'm in."

"Ha!" Jane gloated to her brother. "Two against one!"

Alec sighed, seeing he was losing a case he'd have no control over anyways. "Try not to get into too much trouble, you two."

"No promises." Jane said in a sing-song voice before standing to give her brother a brief goodbye and returning to her task. I giggled at her tone and at the slight irritation it sparked in Alec, though he couldn't stay upset with her for long.

Seeing that Jane had moved on from him, Alec then locked eyes with me. I remained on the ground, looking up at him with a slight frown. It was more out of some bothersome tug that didn't want him to go, but I made sure to push that aside and replace it with a quick, small smile. He hesitated before giving me a nod, "Fiya," and retreating to the door. I watched him go, void of any pertinent thoughts.

It took me a second after the door shut to realise that Jane was staring me down from her spot on the floor, arms crossed and eyebrows raised.

"Yes?"

"Nothing." I relaxed my shoulders and shifted my legs, tucking them into my side. Then, she couldn't help herself. "You two looked comfy."

I laughed softly, expecting the suggestive phrase. "Is this the part of the sleepover where we gossip about boys? Because I don't have anything interesting to share."

Jane raised her hands, yielding to my denial. "Talk about anything interesting?" I shot her a half-hearted glare as she persisted.

I considered the minutes that had passed before her arrival and it struck me that I was a little more than still curious about the conversation we'd ended on. I was sharing before I knew it, "he told me about Marcus' mate. Didyme."

Jane froze at the name and this only spiked my curiosity. Calmly as she could, she continued sifting through the rest of the DVDs. "What else did he say?"

Shrugging, I joined her lazily and without really reading the titles of the entertainment options we had available. "Nothing really. I just asked him a bunch of questions."

"And he answered them?" I huffed lightly, "I know, I was surprised too."

On a mission, Jane insisted, "but he said nothing else?"

"Er…no?" I eyed her, suspicious.

"Why?" She shrugged, "just curious."

Before I could press her on it, she jumped up. "You need snacks. All sleepovers have popcorn and other gross human food."

Clearly, there was something more than curiosity driving her. I soon, however, found the topic fading from my mind by the time the opening credits of our first movie appeared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi y'all! Thank you for reading and for all the kudos! Please comment and let me know what you think! I've been struggling to write the next chapter so I need a little spirit of inspiration :) I hope you enjoyed this chapter!


	20. Attrition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Saffiya and Jane have their first practice session.

**M** y first real crime was insurance fraud.

When I was about five, I started joining my father on some of his work trips. It soon became clear to him that within the very nature of my neurological condition and its' obscurity lied a possible gold mine.

It was very simple, he had explained to me. I was to step in front of a car and possibly retain a minor injury from being hit by said car. And if I was not injured, I was to pretend to be. The injury, fabricated or not, had to be exaggeratedly dramatic with tears, loud cries, and whatever else that would stress the driver into settling on a cash compensation. Or, we'd receive thousands in the driver's insurance money after a doctor confirmed my injuries. Which, due to my history of them, was never hard to do. My father had made it sound so easy and after boosting my confidence, he'd succeeded.

I had no hesitation as I stepped in front of that silver Volvo.

My father had been so proud of me. Getting two scoops of ice cream had made it the greatest day of my life. That con became our go-to to stay under the radar and to claim some quick cash when we needed it. As a result, I got quite good at mimicking other's pain. I would pay attention to news clips of accidents or scenes on TV in order to learn the facial expressions and movements of the victims. To know just what level of pain matched what injury so that I was never selling too much or too little into any given damage. It was a skill that I was able to translate throughout every area of my life. But, it was never quite as useful for anything as it was in my father's scams.

After my mother disappeared, my father pulled me in to his real cons. From forgery to extortion, my father had managed to gain a reputation in the world of white collar crime. Because of this, we often held numerous identities and traveled from country to country living scam to scheme.

In the next few years, we managed to pull off several confidence scams. One of our most successful was a con plainly nicknamed, 'The Miracle Operation', where my father convinced someone of a wealthy status, usually a woman, that there was a doctor that would be able to heal me of my incredibly rare condition if only we could pay their fee. It was a long-con where eventually, out of pity, wanting to please my father, or actually having fallen in love with him, the mark would doll out the exact amount. The next day, we were gone.

Despite multiple encounters with the front bumpers of various types of vehicles and my own dangerous stunts, I'd still never felt pain until Jane's gift. And even then it was…strange. Which, I suppose to a certain degree, should be expected considering the supernatural element of the power. You could also argue that there is something oddly supernatural about my inability to feel pain, but I digress.

Experiencing Jane's gift was almost like lucid dreaming in a nightmare of your own design. Except, you had none of the control.

Carlisle's suggestion had been weighing in the air between us with unspoken pressure. The entire theory that gradually exposing me to percepted pain would help raise my tolerance was as unsupported as it was wild. I should know — I came up with it. But with my life on the line it didn't seem like we had a choice. I knew Jane was reluctant to take part in causing me purposeful pain but her duty took precedence over her own feelings. Which is why we now found ourselves in the throne room with the three Masters and only a handful of the guard.

Jane and I stood across from each other in the center of the floor, as if facing off in a daring battle. The three kings were seated in their thrones, regal and undead, while their guards stood still as stone spaced against the surrounding walls of the hall.

When we'd arrived, Aro had explained that we would have several of these 'practice sessions' to measure and develop my pain responses. Each session, Jane would use her gift on me and increase the intensity of the pain I received based on how well I was doing. Eventually, theoretically, and if all went well, I would be able to withstand enough pain to undergo the transformation process. Fingers crossed, I guess.

"Again."

My inability to feel pain was what made me most fascinating to Aro. Perhaps, if Jane's gift worked well enough, it might actually cure me. As long of a shot as it was, if this did fix my brain, maybe Aro would no longer want me. I wasn't naive enough to believe he would simply let me go, but all I had these days was hope. No matter how implausible. If anything, uselessness would be an even greater guarantee of my death. And what would be the point of going through this whole painful process if I was just going to get my neck snapped some other way. I mean, talk about having no choice.

Aro was practically giddy when we'd started this practice session. Whether that giddiness stemmed from anything less than selfish curiosity, I wasn't sure. Though the session had started out with a light-hearted energy, Aro had grown weary and frustrated as it became apparent that Jane's gift had suddenly ceased to work on me.

"Perhaps, an intermission—"

We must have been at this for over an hour and out of the eleven or so times Jane had delivered an attack, it had only seemed to actually hit me twice. There did not seem to be a clear distinction between when her gift worked and when it did not. Nor was Jane able to control the intensity of the pain I received, something that was greatly puzzling the group.

Basically, this first practice session was not going well. Jane seemed out of sorts from the moment we arrived and I was struggling to even process my own thoughts. The Masters were not pleased.

Marcus was silenced with a look and the heavy command was repeated. "Again."

The very first time Jane had ever attempted to use her gift on me, I had no idea what she was trying to do. I'd felt sharp pokes, like pin pricks, and I wasn't even sure if they actually hurt until after they were fully present and I put together what was going on. The two instances today were as minimal as they had been that first day, so my physical reaction was a lot less impressive than our second time trying her gift in my room. The one Alec had interrupted and Jane regretted.

That second time when I'd asked her to try it again, was the only time I experienced the true greatness of her gift. It was after seeing Demetri fall victim to it so I actually knew what was supposed to happen to me. Before her gift touched me, it was a guessing game of how it was supposed to feel. But, in my memory it felt easy to recreate the feeling — but only the feeling. I had trouble recreating the painful aspect of it. When I tried to recall the exact sense of pain and its' touch, I could only manifest it in a physical manner. My entire body would tense to the point of shaking and while the discomfort was evident, it was manageable.

It may have just been my fault that it wasn't working. Not that it made much sense, but part of Aro's increasing annoyance was my inability to focus on the session. I was growing increasingly distracted the more time we spent on this and I couldn't help it. You would think focusing on the fact that the closest person I'd ever had to a best friend was being told to use her gift to cause me pain in an attempt to theoretically save my life. But no. Caius' growing impatience and deepening frown didn't scare me into obedience, nor did Marcus' careful gaze shame me into paying attention. Not even the grimace replacing Aro's creepy little smile was enough to jolt me from my anxiety surrounding my friends' absences.

Jane and I had been about ten minutes into a Marilyn Monroe marathon when we were summoned to this first practice session. Alec, Demetri and Felix had yet to return and it was only yesterday that Jane and I had binge watched all but two of the Fast and the Furious movies. We'd started this morning with Law and Order: SVU until Jane got too heated so before she got any ideas, we switched to Scooby Doo. I know. All of the amazing games and books available to us and we chose to hole up on the sofas in the room and watch a television screen for two days.

TV had been the only things able to keep my mind off of the mission that the guys were on. When Demetri and Felix left several days ago, all I told was that they'd been checking in with the Volturi's allies across the globe. With the unknown vampires that had deliberately attacked the Volturi guards on a mission only two weeks prior, the potential for the trip's level of danger was clear. Sure, the boy blunders could handle themselves but there had been three guard members in the group that was attacked and Felix and Demetri were not joined by any others.

My paranoia was a product of the changing atmosphere in the castle. Alec, for the most part, had tried to keep me unaware of as much as he could. My curiosity, however, was far more cunning than he anticipated. Listening in to the guards that had stood outside my door during the Volturi meetings would usually be irritated at having to babysit my human self. Though, as days got tenser, they would chat carelessly outside my door and either took no notice or didn't care that I practically sat on the other side of the door to listen in. Their discussions were the equivalent of water fountain gossip and provided me with an insight into the lower guard's mentality.

I used to be under the impression that missions were an exciting venture, something the guard members looked forward to. However, ever since that one guard had returned from a standard mission with news of the deaths of Elizabeth and Killian from an unknown enemy, this seemed to no longer be the case. Apparently they'd rather sit outside my door all day then go on a shot in the dark mission. It was a reasonably cowardly stance, but they didn't seem to care what I thought.

This was how I got the details of all the business that Alec would only share a sentence of. He was rather annoyed the day he returned to find out I now knew details as insignificant as the receptionist being replaced and as big as Elizabeth's disappearance on a mission. Once I knew random business topics, he started to let more and more slip unless I asked a direct question. He would immediately shut down and change the subject. Unless Jane slid in. The elder twin had no problem weighing in and sharing all the gory details of whatever subject we were discussing. Though she was very political in what she did share, never giving me more than I needed and never introducing a brand new piece of information. To her, if I already knew the basics, it was best that I understood it. Still, her vivid accounts greatly displeased her brother and had been the cause of quite a few domestics between the two.

However, now that Demetri and Felix had called Alec in on this assignment, the little info I had was simply not enough. Jane, fed up with me asking her whether she thought they were alright or if they'd checked in yet, finally caved. While she never liked to offer much more than I already knew, when the television wasn't enough to distract me she shared whatever she could about their mission. The purpose of this one, she explained, was to find any leads on the group of vampires that were behind the attack on the guards. For their crimes against the Volturi guard, they would be returned to Volterra and receive a formal trial. I had a feeling that the actual trial would be more of a formality of showmanship than of actual truth and justice. Not that I wanted to complain because I'd liked Killian. Though the moral high ground in my head tried to push back against the idea.

For some reason, scouring the globe was a much more difficult task than they believed it would be, mainly due to the fact that Demetri had been unable to lock on to Elizabeth's track. Evidence that most had seemed to take as proof of her death. Though, Demetri did not seem quite as convinced, Jane admitted though was unable to explain her doubts further. They needed Alec because they'd managed to finally track the group down down and the guys needed his help in returning to Volterra with the packages. I made a mental note to add transportation and baggage services to the plus column of Alec's gift.

Nevertheless, the fact that they had added Alec to their numbers did little to ease my worry. His importance and his inability to properly defend himself while using his powers magnified the dangers of the mission tenfold as far as I was concerned. Plus, there were only three of them, and though they were all much more experienced and skilled than the other group, I still worried that they would end up missing, just like Elizabeth. Or worse.

During the discussion, I became increasingly suspect of Jane's willingness to share so much information. She never wished to spoil our 'bonding time' with talk of official business and she shared more than enough to attempt to give me peace on the topic (even if it didn't necessarily work). It was more like she was ranting on the topic, so I asked, more like blurted out, if she were afraid for Alec. She reminded me that he was one half of the most formidable vampire duo in the world. Then, she skilfully changed the subject to a story that proved this point or she'd play a new episode of whatever we were watching. "Alec isn't afraid of anything", she'd say, "and neither was she". She hid it well.

It felt very human of me to fret for their immortal lives and while part of me hated the emotion associated with my mortality, a bell in my head reminded me to cherish it. Although, none of the Volturi were immune to this rising threat either. Both the twins' heightened sensitivity (recently Jane had used her gift in a manner that could only be described as 'willy-nilly' and "unprovoked") and the guards' watering hole discussions made it evident that the stress stemmed from the top of the chain.

Their stories began to show a theme of eggshells cracking under the weight of the Volturi's reputation, which was crystal clear to me now as I stood in front of the Masters. It felt as if this were some kind of de-stress session for them, watching me be tortured. But without the torture they were expecting, the frustration had only grown. Even Aro was flipping back and forth between deep thought and slight comments of irritation.

They wanted me to be their entertainment? Fine, I had thought. I'll just let myself be exposed to agony and be done with it. Except, they weren't the only ones distracted today. The more I tried to focus on the task at hand, the more Jane seemed to struggle to reach me with her gift. Thinking this through, a new hypothesis began to form in my head. Though I had no ideas as to why, I considered that it was possible Jane's gift had an easier time effecting me the less prepared I was.

She had caught me completely off guard the second time she'd used her gift on me and originally, I had no idea what to expect. The first time, I'd been strangely unafraid for my life and even though I'd just been attacked by strangers and kidnapped by more strangers, I'd argue that I was fairly relaxed. Which wasn't a particularly surprising revelation for me, as my fear response was messed up due to my condition; If you're not afraid of falling from a tree, you tend to climb a lot of trees. This made me believe that it was possible that this attack plan, with one gust of her gift after another, was unlikely to have the desired effect. Which meant that we were all wasting our time and I wasn't the only one with the latter takeaway.

Marcus droned from the corner, "this is no longer a productive use of time." I rolled my eyes, keeping my head down, studying the marble floor. I decided to keep my mouth shut a few attempts ago and just let the vampires figure out what they wanted to do with me. I was at their mercy, mercy I was only receiving because the alternative meant my death.

Caius sneered at Jane from his corner, "she has grown sentimental." The finger of blame being pointed at Jane made me straighten my back. True, Jane did not want to hurt me, but to suggest that she may have actually been holding back was ridiculous. I was only human and if she tried much harder it was possible that it may be too much. Though, I had to admit I understood his frustration.

Jane dropped her gaze in shame as Aro's focus flickered over to her.

"Peace, Brother."

"Is this true…Jane, dear." The false question made me swallow a newly formed lump in my throat. Would they punish Jane if her gift completely stopped working on me? No, Aro would never go there. But the way he watched her now was enough to keep me second guessing. Did he doubt her? If Jane had been holding back on purpose, it would no longer be possible anymore. I refused to be the reason Jane fell out of favour with Aro, especially if it wasn't something she could control. But judging by Caius' new finger pointing technique, they wanted something to blame.

Aro was telling her to prove Caius wrong, to prove that she was completely capable of bringing me to my knees without any qualms. He was forcing her to prove her loyalty. Determination replaced shame as Jane's eyes hardened and trained on me. Like Alec's gift, I imagined a path for her gift to follow as it made its way to me. Zigzagging like lightning, it traveled with the speed of a cobra's deadly strike.

It started off with the subtle flow of a headache, only it vibrated so erratically that it slammed against my skull as if attempting to break down a door. Once. Twice. My hands flew to my head and I folded at my waist. And it was over. I forced my eyes open, following the imaginary zigzagging line of Jane's gift retreating back to her and disappearing. I rested my palms on my knees and met Jane's eyes. The abruptness of my reaction may have been what surprised her, as it was the first time I'd done anything more than flinch all day from her attacks.

The smile had reappeared on Aro's face as he gave a clap of praise at my show of pain. "It seems she has not grown immune, after all." Sure. All it took was half a day to trigger what was the beginning of an unlikely and risky process. If every session was like this, it would take far longer than I'm sure they wanted to wait to get to the point that I would be able to handle the sting of their venom. My original theory had centred around the idea that the pain would break down my defences against it, but what if I was becoming more and more used to Jane's gift.

If we kept at this, there was truly no way to know what could happen. The repeated exposure of her gift on my mind could either build my resistance to it or make me even more susceptible to it and other pain sources. After today, the latter might be more likely. I bit my lip, realising that eventually Jane would have to hit me with stronger bouts of pain if this were so. At what point would the high concentration of her gift on my human mind be more than I could take?

The sage minds thousands of years older than mine were already aware of this, but even they appeared hesitant in continuing. "We should discuss, Aro." Marcus raised his concerns, "lest she be damaged in our haste."

Callously, Caius argued back. "Her life is not our only concern."

"I am aware, Caius."

"Then she must be changed. Now."

Marcus didn't back down, sitting forward with the most energy I'd ever seen him exert. "No final decisions should be made today," he insisted.

Aro made no move to stop their debate. Men of few words, it was the most I'd ever heard them say but if anyone else was surprised by the open exchange, they didn't show it.

Caius slammed his fist on the arm of his throne. "This is a waste of time." He looked stubbornly away from Marcus, trying to get Aro's attention with his tone. "Time that we do not have."

"Yet, it is time that must be made."

It was odd to hear them discussing time with a limit. It was, after all, the one thing they had the most of and they took advantage of it in everything they did. But whatever they thought was coming was enough to disrupt that vampiric standard. Whatever it was, jeopardised their eternity and for some reason, it made a difference if I was human or not when that threat arrived.

"Again." Aro demanded.

Both Marcus and Caius' snapped their heads in his direction. In a frail whisper, I saw Marcus' lips move, "Aro—"

Driven by something hungrier in him, he ignored the surprise and reluctance from his partners, telling Jane to "sustain it."

If I didn't have a reaction this time, would Marcus' argument win out? Would they simply send me back to my room, do some research and gather again with a more thorough plan? Or would Aro agree with Caius, that the reasons they had kept me human were no longer worth the risk if Jane's gift couldn't get through to me.

If it did work, would the original plan be seen through? I preferred this, as it kept me human longer and gave me more time to figure out my next steps. Steps that I had been distracted from figuring out. But I was running out of time if they didn't choose to allow my brain to adjust to the experience of pain. Instead of changing me once we were sure I wouldn't die from the transformation, I could be changed as soon as they made the decision. Tonight? I couldn't let that happen — I wanted to be human.

Why did I want to stay human? I faltered as the thought hit me. My defences had become worn as I spent more and more time with these vampires. I'd been adamant in my position of avoiding immortality. I wanted to live my life, the life I'd planned to not plan. Although doubts and denial stung at my insides, my father's death had freed me in a way that I almost felt selfish for appreciating. It was like not knowing what had happened to my father was holding me back from doing anything but focusing on finding him.

Now that I knew, I felt like I could move forward. It opened me up to living a normal life, whatever I wanted that to be — that is, if you took the vampires out of the equation. I'd made friends with these vampires and I'd grown accustomed to their way of life. I was happy here. But, I wanted more than this life they lived and as sad as it made me to think of leaving them, it was the only way to truly enjoy my freedom.

I wanted to be free. And alive. My reaction to Jane's gift was the only thing keeping me human.

I remembered Demetri when she'd used it on him. The way his body expanded and writhed with uncoordinated agony. The red of his eyes aimed to the ceiling as they had retreated into his skull and the sedated movement of his head dropping back, limply, as if being severed by the dull blade of a guillotine.

Jane raised her head up slowly, hesitantly, before dropping it in a nod to obey her Master's order. Her eyes met mine as she faced me once again, the familiarly innocent porcelain smile on her lips. But her eyes burned with warning and she gave me the tiniest shake of her head. It was so quick, I was sure I imagined it.

I remembered the sounds that had escaped Demetri's body. His groans were the breadcrumbs left behind to remind him that the pain would not last forever. But until it did, he was a prisoner to the Jane's powers and every flinch of his body was proof of that. I had been unable to look away. I had studied him. That had been pain — true pain.

Jane blinked and a howl tore through my lungs. My knees guaranteed bruises in their future as they met with the marble floor. I paired the act with another cry to fit the shattering pain that no doubt belonged to the introduction.

Jane's gift never hit me the same way twice. But this one. This one was blinding, almost too overpowering to even be painful. It was every car slamming into my body, sending me flying until I returned to the ground and the next one took its' shot. It was every piece of bark that cut into my leg as I fell from the top of trees I climbed and every furnace I'd rested my hand on for too long. It was the first time my father showed me a car accident scene in a movie, pointed at the injured character, and said, "monkey see…"

I gave another cry as another wave of pressure was thrust over me and the sound was immediately followed with a crash from somewhere in the room.

“Stop!” There was a tug on my upper arm and a hand was placed on my lower back, as I was lifted up from the ground. The hand on my back pulled me in against a hard chest, as if it could protect me from the mental attack. A hideous, carnal growl rose from deep inside the boy's body. A warning, aimed at his own sister.

I gasped for air, and to my surprise, a familiarly comforting, tasteless smell surrounded my nostrils and sent tingles under my skin. This new olfactory scent fought against the strength of Jane’s gift, and the compressed effect slowly dulled into obscurity. Alec held me against his chest with a protective arm around my back, prepared to keep any further threats from reaching me.

I took in and released a deep breath, confirming that there was no outside force still trying to cause me harm. My head was spinning slightly, but other than that I felt completely fine. I felt my knee twitch and became aware of the hard marble under my shoes. Alec’s arm was more like an anchor to keep me in place against him, but I was, for the most part, supporting most of my bodyweight. Only seconds ago, my legs had given in to an invisible pain and now I was somehow able to stand on my own two feet.

I tried to catch a glimpse of Jane without physically moving to look at her except my hair had fallen to the side like a curtain, effectively limiting my line of sight. She had had to prove herself to the Masters, but I hadn’t expected her to push her gift to that extent on me - at least, not yet. It was so much more intense than any of the other times, so she must have been holding back before. I’d been too curious to be bothered by the brief, limited pain her gift had caused me, but after being sucked through the blackhole that I’d just been down…I was beginning to rethink my willingness to be subjected to Jane’s gift. I wasn’t as confident on my ability to withstand that level of intensity again.

In a sing-song voice, a warning was issued with a single word. “Alec.” His name was dragged out, and the c rolled off the man’s tongue with a charming lilt. When the young man didn’t respect the generosity of the forewarning, one of the lower guards in my vision began to take a step forward. Alec snarled in response, combative, daring her to try. I started in surprise at the primal sound, which only made him tighten his protective hold on me. The guard froze and turned her head in Aro’s direction, likely waiting for a direct order before she dared to risk performing an offensive attack on the boy.

Aro must’ve been waved her down because a firm, final warning reverberated throughout the room. “Enough.” The word echoed with finality and I couldn’t help but tilt my head up to look at him. The voice seemed to bring Alec back to his senses and I could almost see the savage instinct fall back in line. The tension drained from his eyebrows and down, releasing the rest of his body. The vibrations in his chest lulled into silence before Alec dropped his chin to examine my face. His arm was still wound tightly around me and I was extremely aware of just how close we were. I followed his irises as they diligently scanned my body from my scuffed boots all the way up to my neck. Unlike me, he appeared unconcerned with our closeness as he made no moves to pull or push me away, He spent a millisecond staring at my pulse, matching it to the beat of my heart overwhelming his ears. I waited for his eyes to catch mine after they’d made the trail to double check every inch of my face.

I wish I could say I had not noticed how his arm felt around my waist or the inch of skin he touched at my barely exposed hip. But I could not. I did notice it. It made the caterpillars in meskip the cocoon stage to become instant butterflies, spreading from my stomach to every inch of my body like an emotional freaking cancer. Maybe cancer was too harsh a description. Stockholm Syndrome. My butterflies had Stockholm Syndrome. There’s a chance that was too dramatic as well. Conceivably, it was much simpler. Hormones. My butterflies had hormones.

After all, it wasn’t every day an attractive boy matching every detail from every Happily Ever After ending pulled out all thestops from Every Girl’s Guide to Finding Your Prince Charming. At least, until I met Alec it wasn’t. Not that Alec was Prince Charming. Far from it…except for —

I took a deep breath, getting a whole new scent supply of the vampire holding me. I couldn’t remember ever taking distinct notice of someone else’s smell before. Yes, entering someone’s room or hugging them often splashed that person’s distinct air into cognisant prominence. But never before could I recall remaining aware of it, expecting it, remembering it…missing it like I missed their laugh. At least, again, until I met Alec. With thoughts like this, it seemed the butterflies’ hormones were going to my head now. Alec’s expression was growing slightly more worried as I ranted in my mind, so I gave him a quick, reassuring nod.

It was best to keep my mind from that complicated avenue. With the whole vampire mate business, that would be a misguided and pointless path to walk down. Clearly, he’d yet to find his ‘soulmate’ and I think I’d know by now if I had that position in his life. Not that I wanted it, I defensively pointed out to myself. His protectiveness obviously stemmed down to his bloodlust and perhaps a little of it was awarded to me for my value to his sister. I highly doubt she’d be very pleased if I were to end up in the middle of a vampire battle. Blood — both the desire for and the family relation were core elements of Alec’s existence. It was a reasonable and supported deduction. I could be a detective one day. That is, if I ever actually lived to see past seventeen at this point.

I gulped and gave myself a mental pinch to keep on task. The main goal was still to convince them to keep me human for as long as possible. I stepped out of his arms and turned to face Aro. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see him slowly do the same.

The etiquette brought a thin smile to Aro’s face, hitting me with the full gravity of my decision and filling me with nerves. I had unintentionally done the one thing that Aro did not expect, but cherished dearly in that moment.While I acted out of necessity, to the Masters, my choice to return attention to them was obedience. It was exactly how their guards were to behave and I had initiated the move when one of the Masters’ most loyal members was displaying the exact opposite.

“What the hell is going on?”

I saw Caius raise his eyebrows at Alec for the outburst. Alec, recognising that he was pushing his luck, stood down reluctantly. Caius hissed to Aro, "I told you the boy should have been present.”

Aro ignored him, informing Alec cheerfully, “preparation, m’boy!” But he explained no further, leaving Alec to fill in the blanks himself.

“Enough for today, I think.” Marcus’s voice was raspy, sounding, as it always did, as if he hadn’t spoken for several days. His lips were barely parted and his head was raised in curiosity as he seemed to be watching both Alec and I, equally.

Caius supported the statement with a restrained declaration, “I agree."

Marcus’s eyes met mine for the briefest of seconds and after a flash, he seemed to sigh before they trialed off like a snail to Jane and then to the wall. His ability to appear extraordinarily disinterested once again enveloping him in an empty cloud. A cloud that I now had a surge of condolences for after hearing his backstory. Perhaps he could see this newfound sympathy in my eyes, as he often seemed to be paying attention when I was forced front and center. Whenever his name came up, the others had this twinkle of pity in their eyes and now that I knew why, I must have adopted the same look. I felt a wave of helpless guilt for simply knowing the reason behind his sadness. Maybe he didn’t want me to know. Maybe he liked that I hadn’t known. Maybe he liked that I hadn’t looked at him like a damaged animal barely breathing on the side of the road. Or maybe, he really was bored.

Jane appeared frozen in the same position as she had been before. I could see her out of the corner of my eye as well, watching me intently. The expression on her face had returned to the black hole her coven subscribed to. I could feel the muscles in my neck adjust as I tilted my head in her direction, a behaviour I’d adopted in my time with the twins.Of course, I would receive no verbal response at a time likethis, especially as their leader disagreed with the two grand men.

“Not quite, Brothers.” Aro’s smile hadn’t changed, but there was almost a new maliciousness in the way the words entered the air. He continued, his tone implying an intent lacking scientific faculty, and more in the business of ‘for satisfaction’s sake’, “I do wonder what—”

“Aro.” Caius spoke up, looking over me before he gave his companion a single shake of his head. Aro’s shoulders dropped, but he did not protest further. Since when did Caius care about my well-being?

Aro sighed and I tried to keep from glaring at him. “Very well.” He turned, his black cloak extravagantly billowing around his ankles as he returned to sit in his center throne. Still watching Alec and I, he spoke forward but aimed his words at his fellow rulers, “We should invite Eleazarfor a visit.” His believed equals said nothing, but their agreement required no verbal confirmation. Aro opened his mouth as if to continue speaking, but he was interrupted.

A roar bellowed through the thick door Alec had entered from only moments ago. It was followed by a loud bang and a small shriek from who I assumed was the receptionist. The step I had taken away from Alec earlier was countered by him in response to these noises. I could feel the fabric of his clothing grazing my left elbow. It triggered a small push of annoyance because there was such a thing as too protective. Yet, I forced myself to acknowledge that that roar had sounded very inhuman and I was still very much not that. And technically it was Alec’s job to ensure that this distinction did not result in my extinction. So, I put a reluctant check in the vampire plus column and tried to ignore the fact that neither my heart nor its’ speed made so much as a peep in response to the violent exclamation from an unknown vampire until after I connected it with the increased proximity of my second favourite Volturi twin.

Another clap from Aro’s thin, white hands echoed in the chamber. “It appears that Alec has left Demetri and Felix with our rather unruly guests.” He gave Alec a look then, to which the boy nodded and retreated back in the direction he came in. As he slipped back through the doors, another protesting yell claimed the extra sound in the hall, louder and more prominent than the sounds from Aro’s hands. The guard had a brief moment of disarray as some comments were scattered but Caius cleared his throat and order returned.

To Jane and I, Aro exclaimed, “Until next time, my dears.”

Jane’s eyes left me. “Shall I return Saffiya to her chambers?”

Delight flickered in Aro’s eyes as he scanned my posture. I hadn’t moved an inch since separating from Alec and the simple gesture pleased him enough to prompt an unexpected decision from him. “No. This will soon be her life, let her be witness to a proper trial.”

He presented it as if he had awarded me a great honour in allowing me to remain for their next order of business. It was unlikely that he had forgotten that I had already been afforded the opportunity to witness their display of law and order. As if I hadn’t watched Prosper drain the blood from Victor Tima’s body on his orders. Apparently, he did not recall it with the relevance that I did.

If that had been my first experience, I could only imagine what he had in store for me this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends! 
> 
> So! We got a little background info on Saffiya...Great dad, right? There's a lot of things happening in this chapter so if you have questions please feel free to message and ask me. That way I can rewrite/clarify anything that needs it and I love hearing from everyone :) Seriously, this chapter might be a mess so please let me know if you're just like, "Ro, this is all over the place. Please get your shiz together" because that is very possible right now. But, I am so excited for what's coming in the next chapters and I cannot wait to share it with you.
> 
> Thank you for the kudos! Please keep commenting and letting me know what you think! Sometimes a single comment gets a chapter from 500 words to 3500 and I really do value your thoughts! 
> 
> Here's a sneak peak for the next chapter ;):
> 
> "He knows all your secrets," the prisoner sung in the style of a sinful children's rhyme. His eyes landed on me, my form half hidden behind Alec and the vampire raised his hand, pointing directly at me. "And he knows all about the Witch Twin's human mate."


	21. Dissent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the Volturi are threatened.

**J** ane led me to her and Alec's usual place at the left-hand side of the thrones. As soon as we were set, the double doors were pulled open by the guard.

Alec emerged from between them, strutting confidently down the center of the hall as if it were a catwalk for Young Villain's Weekly. A ruthless, cocky smirk stood out prominently on his face and a special kind of darkness chilled off of him in waves to rush over the room. Even members of the guard were avoiding staring directly at him, as if doing so would turn them to dust from the sheer power the vampire commanded.

Behind him, Felix and a lower guard member, Xavier, half dragged, half carried a male body through the doors with Demetri trailing off to the side. The man's eyes were rolled up inside his head and his body was limp, as if he were asleep. Under Alec's gift, the man was completely vulnerable to the coven and whatever they planned to do with him.

Alec bowed his head to the Masters. Felix and Xavier came to an abrupt stop in the middle of the floor and they lifted the rag doll up as if he were standing on his own two feet and not being fully supported by them. Their captive was surprisingly young and he couldn't have been older than his university years when he'd been turned. A medium build, light brown hair hung over his eyes and rested above sharp cheekbones. His face was scrunched together, the only visible reaction to the darkness currently swallowing up his consciousness. Under Alec's gift, the man was incapacitated and utterly useless.

Caius spoke first. "One? We were expecting four."

Demetri's voice wilted from the side, "three older newborns. He disposed of them prior to Alec's arrival. They left a mess behind with the humans."

"We also believe he has been recruiting nomads for quite some time."

"An unusual method to create a coven," Caius remarked, pulling together the most likely assumption of the facts.

However, Demetri shook his head, providing the detail that Alec had been reluctant to. "To form an army." Caius lifted his head as if to challenge the finality of Demetri's conclusion.

Alec claimed the spotlight of the leadership role once more. "Sir, he returned to Volterra willingly, though he has behaved in a hostile manner. " The three kings exchanged looks at this news and my stomach churned nervously. Caius raised a single eyebrow, impatient with having to prod the young man for details. "He claims to have an urgent message from his coven."

Requiring further detail, Aro held out his hand and Alec elegantly moved up the stairs to grant Aro access to his thoughts. After a moment, Aro removed his hand from Alec's, dismissing him. "Very well. Let us see what he has to say."

One might think the reveal of the chain of command would take the young man's arrogance down a notch, or at the very least cease the showboating. After all, it was Demetri who actually tracked the target down and Felix's strength that managed to drag him from who knows where all the way back to the city. Alec had only been included to make the captive go night night for easy travel. Whether he'd been necessary to the mission or not, his dominant position over the other three men was evident with a single look. Not to mention, Alec's graceful parade was eerily identical to the way Aro conducted himself on the steps of the thrones; A young prince mimicking the power of the father.

The aura of magnificence surrounding him didn't go anywhere as Alec stepped back down the stairs; And even though he had returned to an equal level with the rest of the guard, it was clear that any belief of this equality belonged to that of a fool. He was a big game hunter, parading his kill in front of anyone who dared be in his presence. And then he turned and his eyes found mine. There was a flash of something in them and I assumed that he did not expect to see me still present for this part. He dropped his gaze for a brief second and I almost had to do the same to keep from poking fun at what I'd be delighted to assume was the way he handled himself in all of these meetings. And to think, I'd been missing out on excellent taunting material all this time.

I only closed my eyes for a millisecond, but, when I opened them, he had already appeared on my empty side, sandwiching me between him and his sister. He faced the center of the room as if he'd been standing in this position with us the entire time. I resisted the urge to shift my body to look at him properly, knowing that the move would likely be frowned upon for drawing attention.

This swing back to reality put me on the slightest edge, however, and I found myself wishing I could mute my heartbeat. Because while most of the Volturi had at least some practice remaining tame around me, this was the first time I had been exposed to a vampire that was very much not. And while I had confidence that even if the new, blood-drinking arrival was able to get past Demetri and Felix that Jane and Alec wouldn't miss a beat, I was well-aware of the danger I was in.

So, I did what I did best. I faked it. I put on my best 'serious Jane' face and gave myself a new mantra of 'I am not human. My heart does not race ridiculously and attract the attention of everyone in the room. I am stone…' I glanced to Jane and immediately shifted my body to match her, from her stance, her straightened spine, right down to the lack of expression on her face. Though, today was not one of the days that I had chosen clothing to match hers so I stuck out like a sore thumb among the dark cloaks and black clothing. Hopefully this vamp wasn't attracted to colours like raccoons were to silver.

My attention was pulled from the 'guest' anyways as Aro nodded to Alec, who focused on their captive until the man began to regain control of his body again, limb by limb until he was able to stand on his own. Felix and Xavier stood not two inches behind him, each with a hand on either side of the man's biceps. The boy pushed off from the men as soon as he regained control, though they did not respond.

"Welcome to Volterra."

The boy scoffed, once again trying to shove Felix off. "Nice welcoming committee you got here." Aro tilted his head and the men released their prisoner, though they flanked him within a mere step. "Though, I did not expect much from the tyrannical rulers of the vampire world."

Caius' eyes narrowed at his attitude, though neither Marcus or Aro gave it much credit. "You know us and yet, your identity has eluded us," Aro admitted passively.

He hesitated, before wising up, "you may call me Zafir."

"Zafir." Aro smiled at him in his creepy style. "It has been brought to our attention that you have engaged in activities that violate the laws of vampires. Are you aware of these laws that govern our society?"

"I am aware of your laws."

"Yet, you have broken more than one. Including an unprovoked attack on members of our guard."

Zafir sneered, "my coven does not recognize your insignificant rules." Several of the guard hissed at the audacity of the man.

"These laws have been in place for centuries for the protection of all vampires." Marcus rasped, "your coven presumes to know better?"

"We do." He gloated with an ignorant arrogance. "We can and will do better." The suggestion triggered a spot of anger from the crowd.

Caius leaned forward with an icy dominance. "Why, you insolent—" Aro raised a hand and Caius sunk back in his chair.

Aro continued, prompting the vampire to incriminate himself further. "Is this so?"

"I agreed to return with your guard to deliver a message on behalf of my coven's leader, Razin." He spoke casually, as if his words were not sparking dissonance and distaste for him and by extension, his coven. "He is willing to offer you, Aro, Caius, and Marcus, the opportunity to renounce your reign and influence over the vampire world to him and his coven. This would ensure that no harm will come to you or further members of your guard."

I waited for a punch line, a laugh, something that suggested he was of a solid state of mind. He did none of this, his face remained stoically unconcerned. The atmosphere in the room shared the same sentiment of disbelief that I did. Though, I'd only been privy to the Volturi's working for a short time, I was under the impression that in their hundreds of years as 'rulers' that no one had come close to dethroning them. That with the twin's powers behind them, they were unstoppable. What gave this Razin character of theirs the impression that he could do what others failed to? I could not figure any possible reason that would give someone the confidence to announce a plan to overthrow the Volturi's leadership to their faces.

The leaders kept silent and if his words had fazed them, they didn't show it; Which Zafir took as encouragement to continue. He took a deep breath in through his nose and out through his mouth before continuing in a more formal tone. "It is time for the Volturi to step aside."

"Have you any cause for such a demand?" Caius and Marcus turned to Aro, his question humouring the rantings of a confounding individual. Aro's curiosity led him to odd questions and decisions, but to entertain the ramblings of an obsessed man seemed fruitless upon first thoughts.

"You have been blind to a developing world. The humans are growing more powerful." Aro was listening intently and I tried to identify the origin of such outlandish prospects. The likelihood of humans wiping out vampires was as likely as someone returning from the dead. Wait… "If we do not act now, it will mean the end of vampires everywhere."

Caius was livid, but Aro showed no emotion as he continued the conversation with the young rebel as calmly as possible. "And if we do not accept this offer of yours?"

He smiled, too willing to answer the question. "If you choose to stand against us, we guarantee that the legacy of the Volturi will end in fire." No one said a word. The threat was more than clear and I held my breath for the next move Aro would make.

"Jane."

A first-timer, Zafir dropped to his knees almost instantly. He wailed, a dramatically pathetic sound. Once Jane had retreated, he slowly returned to his feet. Zafir shot a glare at Jane before shaking the feeling back into his hand and raising his head in unsupported confidence.

Aro seemed almost amused as he watched the man struggle to stand. "You were saying?"

"The reputation of your Witch Twins precedes all expectations," he commended sarcastically. Witch Twins? "Sad, though. That your survival hinges on children." Aro provided him with no response. So, instead, Zafir's eyes shifted from the twins to me and a grin began to grow on his face. I did my best to remain as passive as the others. He said nothing, instead he swung his head around before settling with playing to the attention of his entire audience in the room. The bragging tone he had been using for his warring threats became pitchier, playful even.

Zafir's pride was bruised but his delusions of his coven's grandeur status were only reinforced. He remained adamant, fixed and confident in his unrealistic beliefs. "Razin has no fear of your Witch Twins. Even their power will not be enough."

Aro waved him off, having grown bored of his empty threats and grandstanding. "Then your leader has made severe miscalculations that have guaranteed not only your death, but his as well." Aro nodded to Caius, who stood from his throne to descend the stairs.

Zafir frowned upon seeing the unchanging faces around him, "you misunderstand." His warnings falling on ears that had crushed every threat they'd ever encountered, but instead of becoming frustrated, he kept his tone light. "He knows all your secrets," he sung in the style of a sinful children's rhyme.

In a rapid swing, his arm cut through the air and he pointed a finger directly at me. Zafir was grinning wide as the Cheshire Cat, his boastful determination returned full fold as he attempted another tactic to get under the nerves of his audience. Automatically, Alec's hand slipped to my wrist and with a quick tug, he'd smoothly hidden most of my figure behind him and out of the stranger's view. Over Alec's shoulder, I could see that the reaction made the man's disturbing grin grow with pompous success.

"And he knows all about the little Witch Twin's pet." He let out a low hum, eyes directly on me.

"I'm no pet." Wrong move.

"I wonder." He teased, "will you taste as good as you look?"

Jane got to him first. The words had barely left his mouth before he was curled into his chest, already on his knees before the Masters. The dark chuckle that had ended his threat turned into screams of agony, Jane's gift showing no mercy. At almost the exact same time, there was an echoing boom behind me. As I whipped around to the source of the noise, I had hardly processed Alec's missing form from my other side before I realized that he had been the cause of the startling sound. Demetri had him pressed against the wall as he struggled to free himself. His teeth were bared and wild eyes were aimed at the same person his sister was mercilessly torturing.

She had been too fast for her brother and I reached out a hand to touch her shoulder, hoping to bring her back from the white rage that had overtaken both the twins' reactions. Caius had ignored the outburst, instead returning to his throne with a calmness matching the other kings and diametric to the rest of the room. As he did so, Aro signalled an end to the disarray. Finally, Jane's name joined the air, another soft contrast to the howls echoing in the chamber.

The scream began to die out as Jane obeyed the order. Felix and Xavier grabbed the vampire's arms as he fell forward, halting the man before he could wrap his arms around his chest. Alec shoved Demetri away from him and reappeared at my side as if nothing had happened, though he had shifted his body once more so that I was almost completely blocked from the view of the vampires in the middle of the room.

The prisoner gave a low chuckle, though he coughed in the middle of it — no doubt, a result of all the screaming he'd just done. Still, he kept forth his devoted, dense, attitude and though it was clearly more show than reality, the nonchalance still tickled the thin strings of patience in the rest of the guards. Jane had a slight pout and I could almost hear her beating herself up for falling for the provocative taunts.

I grabbed for her hand behind Alec's robe, a telling reaction that would no doubt be frowned upon if anyone had seen it — especially the captive. Nevertheless, she squeezed my hand back, but released it all too quickly. This was no time for my puny, bothersome, human emotions, I chided myself. I was lucky that no one had seen, but I struggled to settle back into the numbness I had started the trial with.

Once everyone settled, Aro cleared his throat. "Your threats are without foundation," Aro informed him. "Your coven may desire power, but any attempt to destroy the Volturi will fail."

"They are not threats, but rather a forewarning of the rebellion that is to come." He began to bend his leg to stand but Xavier pressed him back down to his knees. "Razin will save our kind, restore us to our former glory at the top of the food chain. His reign will become legendary and it will commence as he stands on your ashes in this very room. He tried again to stand, but Felix placed a hand on the back of his neck and tugged his arm out and behind him, holding him in place. Still, he continued, losing more of his credibility in his frenzied rant, "he shall announce our existence, our majesty to the humans. They will bow before us and we will be their Gods."

Zafir's voice rang out in the chamber and his head dipped, darkness seeping into his words for the first time. "He has seen it." I had no idea what he meant, but it caught Aro's immediate attention. A smirk on the man's face took on the same harshness as his tone, as if he had been expecting this reaction.

In a flash, Aro had glided down the stairs and taken hold of the man's hand. The silence in the room was killing me and my eyes skirted between everyone I could lay my eyes on. But nothing clued me in to exactly how or why Aro's low rating of the possible calamity in Zafir's warnings had flipped so quickly.

Aro released Zafir's hand and turned his back on him, giving one simple nod to his partners. However, he continued to address Zafir. "Razin. Your…leader, has chosen a telling nom de guerre."

Zafir's chest puffed out and commendations for his coven leader spilled out of him. "By rebelling against the oppressive rule of the Volturi, he stands akin to the greatness of the Cossack leader, Stepan Razin. My leader is fearless and he leads an army greater than your mere guard." Felix and Xavier gave sharp pulls on his arms and I could see him hold a groan in his throat at the careless pain they inflicted.

Weighing the young man's aggrandised review of his coven head, Aro stated, "Stepan Razin is considered a hero of the Cossack yeomanry."

Not missing a beat, Zafir declared, "my chief will be remembered as a hero for his people."

The leader of the Volturi clicked his tongue and gave Zafir a pitying glance, sans any real empathy. "And yet he has sent a vampire just past his infancy to threaten the most powerful coven of vampires. Alone."

This was the first time the captive faltered and he gave a quick, nervous glance over his shoulder to see the guard members trained on him, just waiting for the word. He was going to die here, today, and no doubt he would go down preaching the words he'd been fed by his commander with the intensity of a cult-like influence.

He doubled down. "It is not a matter of if, but when, you and your coven will fall." He turned around, stuck his chin back up and said, "one day soon, the Volturi will pay for your cruelty and repression of our kind."

"Perhaps." A small smile found its way to Caius' lips. "But, I am afraid you will not live to see it."

"My death is a necessity in the story of your defeat."

Marcus leaned forward, his voice hollow as he agreed, "then the punishment shall fit the crime."

"Your actions have risked the exposure of our world and the future of vampire-kind." Caius declared. "For this, you will die."

With a roar, Zafir managed to manoeuvre himself out of his captor's grasps and he lunged toward the three kings, though he did not make it far. Felix had him caught cold before he could take a step and shoved him back to the ground, slamming his face into the marble stone floor. Surely, this would silence his disrespect but it only seemed to spur him on. A small hum turned into mocking laughter as the man lifted his head with a cynical grin. A long, thin crack ran across his face from his left ear to the other side of his lips. So, this was what Felix and Demetri's sparring practices were meant for. Except, Felix held nothing back this time. I viewed his large stature as somewhat endearing, similar to that of a lovable oaf. But, as he shoved the man's head back into the floor, I could feel my chest fighting against opposing judgements of the scene.

My throat tightened at the sight and I could feel the glass shatter around the part of my heart that believed Felix could no do evil. It was like the heartbreak when you watched your favourite childhood movie only to realise you could now only see it from an adult's point of view. Watching Felix pull the man to his feet, his cheek shattered like a porcelain doll, was gut-wrenching in that moment. I felt like I was reading Of Mice and Men, and only just comprehending why George refused to let Lenny near the fluffy, fragile bunnies on their imagined farm.

I had been humanizing my vampire friends. Which even though technically I would argue they were still human in everything but nature, I had been decisively ignorant in the reality of what they were. I knew it, and they never failed to remind me, but this was perhaps the first time I felt that 'monster' was more a part of their definition than it was an insult. And all it took was playful Felix initiating a pointlessly violent attack, one that I was more fascinated by than terrified of.

Felix's strong-arming did little to diminish the passion that his captive preached with. He had not achieved fear within the leaders, as seemed to be his intention. Instead, Zafir chose a new target. His words came tumbling out in a shout faster than they his mouth could move. They leaked of desperation, but the bait was too good, too unexpected and it caught the two men holding him off guard and they froze, as I did, at the captive's words.

"He's coming for your mate, Witch Boy."

I'd hardly processed the words before a tiny gust of air swept over me. Alec snarled, dashing forward and grabbing Zafir by his throat, slamming him into the floor. His right foot stomped on the lesser vampire's arm, holding it down as Alec crouched above him. "Stay away from her," he hissed.

"So protective of the human. Can't say I blame you — with enemies like yours." Zafir turned his head to look at my stunned face and his eyes scanned my body. Amused by the power he held over Alec, he continued egging on the boy that literally held his life in his hands. "Just being your mate will put her in constant danger. And it's all your fault."

I knew I shouldn't have engaged, but the words slipped out, "what are you talking about?"

Zafir raised his eyebrows before the reason for my confusion seemed to dawn on him. He sniggered, cheerfully exclaiming, "oh!" A delighted, broad smile spread across his face as he laughed in Alec's face. Alec's glare hardened, aimed to the offending vampire. "She didn't know?"

Alec shoved against Zafir's throat, choking him. If he pushed hard enough, he would crush the rebel's larynx. Before he could do so, Felix grabbed him under his arms and removed him from atop the man. He shoved Alec back in Jane and I's direction and helped Xavier put Zafir back on his knees.

Alec froze when he met my eyes. I swallowed, wetting my lips before asking, "what is he talking about?"

"Oopsie." Zafir giggled behind Alec until his voice was stolen, his throat running raw as Jane attacked again with a vengeance. But he'd gotten what he wanted and the damage had been done.

Alec appeared in front of me, his hands gently cupping my cheeks. His eyes bore into mine and he pushed my hair off of my face. "Saffiya…" he whispered desperately, "cuore mio." I began to shake my head, the weight of the situation intensifying. My hands hung limply at my sides and I clenched my fists as they began to shake. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to pause this moment or to rewind and find more time to process. To think. I needed to think.

Finally, my eyes blinked open and Alec's mask had completely dissolved, revealing a remorseful and pained expression on his face. He breathed out his confession, "you are my mate…unico mio." I couldn't find it in me to remember how to speak or how to breathe. I was frozen, stuck until I was saved by the villain in the room.

"Listen to that heart race. How sweet — I love a good doomed romance." Alec let out a low growl and broke away from me to face the source of his emotions, keeping me as best out of sight as possible. But, I stumbled back and Jane's hand landed on my shoulder blade to steady me.

He was posturing now, but we were all falling victim to it. He had identified the weakness none of us could have expected or prepared for, thus delaying his inevitable death for a short period of entertainment. The three kings did nothing and he remained in the hold of Felix and Xavier, though Demetri was now placed directly behind him. Waiting for the order to see his sentence through and rid of us the burden. But, no one made a move.

Zafir was emboldened by his success so far and as he'd done since his arrival, he continued talking. Because I was the weakness and somehow, he knew just where to poke. "I wonder. If only daddy dearest could see you now — joining a vampire cult. Would he be proud of his little girl?"

That stole my attention, but I wasn't the only one.

"Enough." Caius declared and he flashed down to stand before the vampire, his hands wrapped around his face.

"Wait!" I cried out, forcefully pushing past the twin's delayed line of defence to stop me. The sick smile returned to his face as I broke the Volturi wall of stone affect once more. I couldn't bring myself to care, desperate for the information I was sure he had. "What do you know about my father?"

Felix pulled the left arm taut as Xavier grabbed his other arm, and Caius began to twist his head. A distinct cracking sound paired with garbled sounds in the back of Zafir's throat.

"No!" But Alec grabbed hold of my waist and held me back. With a loud crack, a sound mimicking shattered glass signalled the end of Zafir. The vampire had been torn to pieces before I could blink.

I cried out, struggling weakly against Alec's arms. He pulled me closer to his chest, lowering his head to whisper in my ear. "Saffiya, he was playing you." The lilt of his voice that normally soothed me should have calmed me down as he intended. But, I refused to give in. "He knew nothing about your father."

I shouted out as some of the lower guard began to clear the body and Alec finally released me. "Really? Because he seemed to know about a lot of other things." I threw back.

His eyebrows narrowed and I wondered if he would even realise why I was upset before his frustration prompted an outburst. "That is not fair."

"Isn't it?" Forgetting our audience, I lost myself in the stillness between us. I bit my lip, trying to find the right words. Normally, I would never address one of our grievances in front of others, but this time it was different. And I had to know. "How long have you known?" The question caught him off guard and his face fell, as if he expected me to just move past him keeping what was probably the biggest secret possible from me.

"From the moment we met."

_He was looking straight at me. His hood had fallen, yet I could hardly make out his features through the darkness. Except his eyes. Which now barely passed as red and I wondered how I could have confused such a colour with black. My mind was in such disarray that it hadn't even processed the events in front of me yet. It was like I was stuck, because I couldn't tear my eyes away from him either._

"You were not supposed to find out this way." Alec reached out a hand to touch my arm. But, I moved quicker than he expected and slapped the attempt away from me. He froze, watching me cautiously, waiting for my next unpredictable move. If he tried to grab me again and I fought back, he risked accidentally injuring me — or rather I risked injuring myself on his marble body. 

My mouth was dry, but I summoned the courage to look at him again. "You should've told me."

He nodded, "I know."

The room was stunned into silence, all eyes on us as I dropped my head away from Alec. They had all known and clearly, no one expected this reveal between Alec and I to happen like this. Maybe it was a sign. We'd been at odds for half the time we'd known each other. I doubted friendship would be easy to recover after this incident. Then there was the third option. A new option.

The room was stunned into silence. They had all known and clearly, no one expected this reveal between Alec and I to happen like this. Maybe it was a sign. We'd been at odds for half the time we'd known each other. I doubted friendship would be easy to recover after this incident. Then there was the third option. A new option.

Finally, Aro cleared his throat. "Jane, would you please escort Saffiya to her room. I believe some rest would suit her." Jane was as shocked as the others, but she quickly recovered.

"Master."

I came to a stop at the top of the second stairwell. It only took Jane a second to realise that I was no longer following her.

"What are you doing?" She snapped at me, though her face softened as she took in my blank expression. She hadn't said a word to me since we'd left the throne room, only leading me through the dark hallways with a cold shoulder vibe. I assumed her behaviour had something to do with what I'd said to Alec, so maybe she was just surprised or she was upset with me. Either way, I was too mixed up in my own head to question her and have a conversation if it was merited. I'm not sure I could handle something like that at the moment..

I looked up at the grand doors that housed centuries of books behind them. "I want to be in the library."

Jane shook her head, denying my request. "You need to rest."

I closed my eyes, dropping my head down pitifully. "I can't. Not right now." I still had a vexing electricity coursing through my veins, causing the kind of adrenaline that makes you feel like you were moving at the speed of a turtle — mentally and physically.

She relented as she realized that my mind had been made up. The two guards that had followed us exchanged glances before taking up post outside the library doors, opening them up for us. Jane followed me to one of the seating areas, eyeing me as I collapsed on the couch and faced out of the window.

"One hour. Then, you sleep." I nodded, not feeling up to countering the time limit placed on me. I had been staying in Alec's room and I had no desire to go anywhere near him at the moment.

Jane hesitated and I could feel her eyes boring into the back of my head. I knew she probably wanted to say something else, probably about Alec. But she didn't and I didn't ask. I continued to stare out of the window at the open skies. A few seconds later, I heard the library doors close and I was left alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all!
> 
> So…that happened. At least I didn't leave a cliff-hanger this time! Right? Let me know how y'all are feeling in the comments! What do you think Alec's reasons for keeping this secret from Saffiya? And what's with this Razin guy? Thoughts? 
> 
> I went a little history nerd on y'all in here as well. May be a bit of foreshadowing in that ;) Also, just a side note that I cannot guarantee that the following chapters will be quite as long as this one was (in comparison), as they may be more dialogue heavy but I honestly have no idea. This just sort of happened after I read your comments!
> 
> Thank you to everyone who left kudos and those that commented for all your kind words, you are all so wonderful. Special appreciation to Pivinne, Princessleia9977, NeverLookBack98, CrimsonFantasty, PrincessKD, NeverLookBack98, Bb, angelle and sabrinanbg for your comments on previous chapters! I honestly do not believe I would be able to continue this story when it gets bumpy without your votes and comments. I never understood how much they meant to authors until now.
> 
> sabrinanbg: You're so sweet! He truly is underrated and there's so much potential there. Hello to Belgium from the States! I love to see how this story has readers from so many countries.  
> PrincessKD: Welcome to the Alec and Volturi fanclub ;) Romance and much more are indeed in our sights!
> 
> Thank you for reading, as always, and goodnight, good morning, and happy birthday to anyone who might be celebrating :)
> 
> Ro
> 
> Translations: The language is Italian: "Cuore mio" = my heart and "unico mio" = only mine, or my one. - I try to check in with friends that I have in whatever country of origin for phrases or words that aren't overused, so I will put little comments at the end in the future if needed. 


	22. Allocutus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Alec and Saffiya face the facts.

**I** wanted nothing more than to sleep. For days, ideally. Demetri and Felix, however, had other ideas.

Since Jane had left, I'd been unable to fall asleep. The day's events had been overstimulating my brain as I struggled to find a suitable distraction. Which is why I was glad when Felix and Demetri barged into the room. They never stayed on any one topic for too long and their bickering made for excellent entertainment. And after bribing me with popcorn, they'd talked me into having a movie night.

"Pick something." I looked up from my book and raised my eyebrows at Demetri. "Seriously. Before Felix returns or we'll end up watching three hours of lasers in space."

I convinced Demetri to let me finish my chapter until Felix got back. It was only fair, seeing as they'd been the ones to interrupt me. But, I decided that satisfying his question would allow for that. "What film do you want to watch, then?"

His answer was immediate. "Something with cars."

"Great, any movies about cars?"

"A few come to mind," he said casually, his grin growing.

"Then I pick those movies."

"Which one?"

I shrugged. How many could there be? I looked back down to my book and not a second later, Demetri sighed dramatically on my right.

"I'm almost done. I promise."

He lifted the book up in my hands so he could see the cover. "I thought you finished this one weeks ago?"

"I read it a lot," I said, shrugging. "Wait, how did you know that?"

He copied my shrug. "Alec mentioned it. The guy wouldn't shut up about you for the last two missions. Seriously, the whole time." He threw one hand behind his head and leaned back on the couch, mumbling to himself, "kid needs a muzzle." I looked down at the book in my hands, my fingers tracing the text printed inside it. Demetri froze, realising his use of the boy's name broke the code of silence on the elephant in the room. He gave a guilty chuckle, "my bad…" I was surprised to hear that Alec talked about me at all, even more so because it wasn't Jane telling me this.

"It's okay. A muzzle's a good idea." Demetri grinned when he heard my joke, probably pleased I hadn't yelled at him instead. And Demetri, being far more emotionally intuitive than our dear friend, Felix, used the moment to breach the topic of the boy.

"You wanna talk about it?" I cringed at the suggestion, though I gave him a reluctant smile, appreciative of the gesture.

I closed the book in my lap with a snap. "Not even a little."

"Can I just say one thing?" I sighed, willingly giving him my attention. I felt so lost that it couldn't hurt to have a few outside perspectives. "If Alec kept the—" I tensed, expecting him to use the word I'd been trying to avoid thinking about and he noticed this. "Thing… from you for this long, he definitely has his reasons."

"Demetri—"

"I'm not saying let him off the hook, but maybe just hear him out?"

My tone was bitter with the history between Alec and me. "Would you?" He appeared thoughtful about it, but didn't get the chance to answer as the double doors of the library disturbed the peace.

Felix barged into the room, along with a strong smell that wafted through the library like cigarette smoke. He turned the corner into the alcove, holding a bowl of popcorn at arm's length.

I pouted, "you burnt it."

The large man rolled his eyes at me, holding the bowl above my head and out of my reach. "Thank you Felix, my favourite-st and the hottest vampire to ever exist, how thoughtful of you." I pouted and his eyes checked out the ceiling once more before he gave in.

I grinned as he plopped it in my lap and moved to the couch diagonal to mine, his nose crinkling from the smell of the human food. "Thank you."

Throwing his arm over the back of the couch, Felix reminded us of our main task for the night. "So, what are we watching?"

Demetri nearly squealed, "Batman!"

I couldn't help but give a snort of laughter. "That's a car movie?"

"Humans can make all the corvettes and jaguars that they want. But the Batmobile — now that's a car."

"Well, it is appropriate," I agreed. "Especially after how Felix kicked that guy's butt today." I declared, pretending to throw a punch and a kick.

Felix beamed with pride. "Hell yeah, I did."

Demetri chuckled, "so modest."

I leaned forward excitedly to Felix, "will you teach me how to do that?" I wasn't completely helpless when it came to fighting, but I definitely didn't look as cool as Felix when he fought.

I expected him to be ecstatic, but he hesitated and glanced at Demetri. "I'm not sure that's the best idea."

The other man rubbed his neck and added, "yeah, Fi. You're kind of…breakable."

"I'll wear kneepads and a helmet if I have to." Felix considered this and nodded eagerly.

"That could work!"

"It's a bad idea," Demetri countered, taking on the rarely held position of 'party-pooper' in our group. "You get so much as a bruise and Aro'll have his head."

Felix's let out a booming laugh, "not to mention Alec—" Demetri shoved an elbow at him, but it was too late. Both men turned to see my reaction.

I pretended not to notice the slip. "Oh, please. I've had so many fractures, breaks, burns, and cuts that I can hardly remember where they all came from." I laughed a little at their sensitivity, "I swear, I could scrape my knee on the sidewalk and you'd all act like the world was ending."

"Only if you were bleeding." I snorted at the comment

"Now, that, is a scar I do not have," I winked, thinking of the fang marks critical to the vampire legends. Felix couldn't help but give a boisterous laugh and Demetri rolled his eyes, but smiled anyways.

He leaned back, throwing out, "maybe when you're a newborn. You might just put Felix through the floor."

I swallowed at the reminder of the impending, undecided date. I still had no escape plan, short of trying to scale the castle walls, and no ideas as to where I'd go first. But I nodded along with Felix, attempting to mirror his level of enthusiasm.

"As an expert in kicking ass, it is my honour to take you on as a student." He gave a little bow and Demetri scoffed.

"Please. You should see my skills — when I'm not going easy on this guy." He winked at me, baiting Felix even more.

"Hush, Demetri. It's my turn for the spotlight."

"But if she really wants to learn, it should be from the master."

I was silent as they bickered, stuck on something they'd mentioned as a throwaway word. "What's a newborn?" I asked, remembering the word from the trial earlier.

"A new vampire." Demetri easily explained away. "The first three months of a vampire's life, every one of your new attributes is heightened — from strength to blood lust."

Felix added, "they're near impossible to control." I frowned. "What does—"

"Questions later!" Felix appeared in front of me, patted my head, and helped pull me up from the couch. "Movie time." He handed me my popcorn.

I cast a glance over to Demetri, who reassured me, "don't worry, we'll answer all your questions. You have time." Time. But, how much? I lagged behind the two men as we headed for the doors, and as if it'd been planned, they began to creak open.

Alec halted in the doorway upon seeing Felix and Demetri. They had done well enough to distract me, but now that the source of my frustrations was unavoidable, I doubted even Batman could heal the furious and contrasting emotions raging inside me. His entrance reminded me of everything I'd been trying to ignore.

Alec's eyes narrowed as he traded looks with Felix, then Demetri, before finally landing on me. His eyes softened, inspecting me for any damage, as he always did when he hadn't seen me for a while. I used to think it was some weird insurance to avoid getting in trouble for accidentally hurting me again. Now, though, I knew that I was probably wrong in this assumption and that Alec likely had a less calculating reason for doing it. A reason that sent butterflies through my stomach before they were forced to take a backseat by the unmistakable fury that shared its' space, refusing to be silenced.

Demetri leaned in a bit, as if to hide me from Alec's view or vice versa, stealing Alec's attention from me. He glowered at the man, but I still couldn't tear my eyes away from his face.

After standing in silence for longer than was reasonable, Alec looked back at me and croaked out, "can we talk?" The sound made me bite my lip, wondering if vampire's could cry, would I see tear stains on his cheeks. I brushed the thought aside, thinking my thoughts were too dramatic.

I hesitated as Demetri turned around to give me a look. He tilted his head to Alec, as if assuring me that if I chose not to stay with Alec that they would stand by me. I glanced back to Alec. He was looking at me with a sort of saddened hopefulness that pushed past my anger, though the fire kindled, impatiently waiting for an opportunity to return.

I found myself nodding, politely declining Demetri's unspoken offer of support. "I'll be fine." I gave him and Felix a small smile and it was the best I could manage under the circumstances. I pushed my bowl of popcorn off into Demetri's hands, "protect that with your life."

Demetri wrapped an arm around the bowl to secure it and walked to Alec, claiming his direct attention. However, it was Felix that spoke. "We'll give you the room, then," he was matter-of-fact, ruffling my hair casually as he passed by me. In an obvious attempt to brighten my mood, he cheered, "movie night will prevail!" But I had already turned my attention back to Alec so Demetri nudged his shoulder and led him out of the door as he pouted childishly.

The boom of the doors closing bounced off of the library walls, waking me from my haze. Alec made no move to say or do anything and the longer we stood there, the more I struggled to suppress the reckless emotions inside me. Seeing no point in standing and staring at each other for an unnecessary amount of time, I spun on my heel and returned to the couches the guys and I had occupied barely two minutes ago.

I'd been reading a fairytale book before their arrival, so I retrieved it from the couch. I considered the collection more 'light reading' than one that required constant focus and comprehension. It was one I often pulled from the shelves to read a story or two out of. Due to the chaotic state of the library's system, I was committed to returning my borrowed books back where I found them. This was as good a time as any while I waited for Alec to get out whatever he wanted to say so we could just move on.

I turned to look for Alec by the door, but he was gone. A quick flash of disappointment and relief passed over me just as I turned into the pathway between the bookshelves and spotted him. His hands were in his pant pockets and he stood directly in between two aisles of books. Specifically, the exact aisle I needed to complete my task. He must've assumed which book I'd been reading and remembered its' location. He gave me a soft smile, one just barely there.

Frowning, I brushed past him, turning into the fourth row of books. I slid my fingers across the binders of the dusty and weathered novels until I found the spot I was looking for. As I reached up, I could see Alec out of the corner of my eye as he waited for me to finish. He leaned against the shelf and silently watched as I slipped the antique copy of Grimm's Fairytales into its' rightful spot. There was nothing else to do that would help me put off this interaction with Alec. It was time. So, sighing roughly, I crossed my arms over my chest and faced him.

With my attention, he rubbed the back of his neck and shifted back and forth, stepping away from the shelf. He looked awkward, uncomfortable and there was no hint of his carefully crafted exterior of pride and arrogance. It was an emotion that I never would have imagined him giving anyone the opportunity to observe.

"Jane said you were here." I nodded, confirming his sister's story. Not that I needed to, considering our current location. "She wanted to apologise for the way your practice session ended."

I raised an eyebrow. "Jane…apologise?" Jane had at least three tendencies when it came to dealing with 'societal expectations': 1) She never verbally apologised for anything. Though, she did perform little tasks or the like that expressed the notion as best she could. 2) She was a notorious cheater in board games and everyone knew it. And if you confronted her, she'd double down. And 3) a lack of patience that often led to temper tantrums and ended with her amusing herself by using her gift on whoever was to blame. She was a charming girl.

"She seemed to be confused," he corrected. "Do you know what happened?"

"Err…yeah. It hurt." I rolled my eyes, my tone dripping sarcasm. "She doesn't need to apologise. It's barely a memory."

"You're sure?" Of course I was sure. She'd done nothing wrong.

It was as if he were attempting to gage my mood and my level of hostility, waiting to see if I were still upset with him. I decided to make it clear, "what do you want, Alec?"

He dropped his head to study the floor, debating his response in his head. Why couldn't he just tell me — "Marcus said the Masters would wish to speak with us. If we cannot figure out how to, well…"

"Not kill each other?" I filled in the blanks with a slight humour and his eyes immediately returned to mine, burning like wildfire.

Yet, his voice was gentle, "that's not funny."

I bit my lip and rubbed my arm guiltily, knowing it was a step too far. "Sorry." I turned to lean my head back against the books, supporting myself on the shelf.

So, the adults wanted to step in and mediate. I debated how bad it would be to talk about all of these strange emotions I was experiencing in front of Aro, Caius, and Marcus versus discussing them privately with only Alec. It sounded mortifying, but I refused to give in so easily. "I don't want to talk to you." His mouth dropped as if he expected a more timid response from me. No way, Jose. Not this time.

He recovered quickly, however, unconsciously puffing out his chest and adjusting his stance. "Well, too bad, because I do."

I scoffed, "you see — that. That right there."

"What?"

"You! You're the most egotistical, self-righteous person I've ever met." I threw my hands up in distress, easily falling back into the battle positions we were so used to. This was, however, much more than a simple tiff. "Just because you've decided now is a convenient time for you to talk, doesn't mean I have to."

He gritted his teeth, frustrated with my temper and trying to control his. "Then, when would you like to talk?"

"Never." I crossed my arms again, refusing to look at him.

He chastised me impatiently, "you are behaving like a child."

"Or maybe you're just old." "What is your problem?"

I turned my glare from the bookcase in front of me to him. "Seriously?"

He cast his eyes down and away from mine, running a hand through his hair as he struggled to find the words to help me understand. The gentleness returned to him for a moment, revealed in the insecurity. "I wanted to tell you."

As much as I wanted to hear what he had to say, I couldn't bite back the betrayal that was consuming me. Demetri had asked me to be patient with him, but I wasn't able to manage even that. Not yet. "Would that have been before or after I'd been turned into a blood-sucking demon and had no choice but to be stuck with you?"

I achieved my goal as his face filled with hurt and immediately, he denied the accusation. "Do you truly think so little of me?"

"Is it not reciprocated?" I retorted and he seemed to be confused by my claim. "Until a few weeks ago, you were absolutely horrid to me, even knowing what you did." I was struggling to move past the fact that he'd kept this secret from me and until I did, I wouldn't be able to even consider what it all meant. What did being 'mates' actually mean, how would it change our current relationship? These were questions begging desperately for attention, but it was more than I could give at the moment.

He pursed his lips and I could see him processing my words, though he didn't seem to comprehend my point. "I've told you I was sorry." He took another step towards me but I held a hand out firmly to deny his attempt to connect with me. If he touched me for even a second, I would not be able to stay angry with him. That, I knew for sure. His touch clouded my determination and if I gave in before we'd addressed the details, we'd never be able to move past this.

"And yet, three months later and we're right back where we started. With you and your secrets." I pushed past him but he caught my wrist and pulled me back. I gasped, immediately meeting his eyes which burned into mine. For a moment, I was lost in him and I could almost feel the wall of my enmity breaking down.

Through his teeth, he tried to convince me, "Like it or not, those secrets keep you safe."

For some reason, the return of those words sent a raging fire through my bones. His words inspired my fury to push back against the effect he had on me and I tore my wrist away from him. I glared and told him, "I'm getting really tired of hearing that."

"It is the truth."

I scoffed. "Where I come from, the word secret is synonymous with a coward."

"I did not make the decision to keep these secrets lightly."

"And yet you've lied to me and forced others to do the same."

He closed his eyes, his voice tight and divisive in itself as if trying to hold back the bull that kicked impatiently at the door of its' stable. The bull was winning. "Must you be so difficult?"

Throwing his vexed attitude back at him, I charged, with little regard for consequence, "because I didn't just give in and fall into your arms to live happily ever after like a good little human?" I knew it was unfair of me, but he easily took my bait.

He didn't falter, didn't hesitate as he raised his voice at me again, "it'd be a hell of a lot better than this!"

I froze and he dropped his head in shame as his temper attacked me. Before he could recover and try to offer a new apology, I continued to let my anger control my brain. It took the reins and tossed them aside, and I'm not even sure I felt human anymore.

I smirked bitterly, ruefully as I stared back at him. "Was it worth this?"

His jaw tensed before ruby eyes focused on mine. "Yes."

"Pardon?"

"You are my mate and you are alive and breathing - here. With me." He stared at me, wide-eyed, as if he didn't fully believe that this moment would come to pass. He cleared his throat, "I stand by my decision."

I choked on a breath, struggling to even fathom that this was real. "Then this conversation is over."

He let out an exasperated sigh at my contempt, that I wasn't going to make this easy on him at any turn. He wasn't giving up. But, instead of trying to meet me halfway, he muttered woefully, "all of the centuries. Of all the women. And it had to be you." He said this more to himself, but he made no attempt to lower his voice or hide the spitefulness that coloured his words. It would've been amusing if it didn't feel so personal. He wanted it to sting and it hurt a lot more than I was willing to acknowledge.

Momentarily lacking the ability to consult the least reckless part of my brain, I found myself on defense, biting right back at him. Honestly, I didn't mean to say it — I was just so angry, "brilliant. Go make one of them your mate and leave me alone." Alec's face dropped and I felt a pang in my chest at the sight.

"Saffiya!" He exclaimed, appalled, as if I'd just confessed to some heinous crime.

"What!" He didn't answer me. Instead, he closed the gap between our bodies and captured my face in his hands.

And his lips came crashing down on mine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: FINALLY! AmIRight!
> 
> I know you waited a long time for this chapter and it may not feel as long because it is a lot of dialogue, so to round it all out I just decided to be the worst and give you guys a lovely little cliffhanger. WhAT's gOnnA HAPpEn!? ;)
> 
> You may have noticed I've been a bit scatterbrained recently. So, I must be an adult and tell you that I cannot post at all in the next week. I have an application due for my dream school and I have maybe 2 sentences done in my essay. The faster I get it done, the sooner I can continue to write for all of you. If I have any updates or comments in the next week, I will post it on my account wall and maybe add it to the end of this with an update notice.
> 
> Two Important things to Note:
> 
> A lovely reader, littlebbyalien (Wattpad), umfokazi (Fanfiction), has been given permission by me to translate this story into Polish and post it on here and on Wattpad. If you'd like to read the story in Polish, go check it out!
> 
> 2) A disclaimer before the story continues. I do not write pregnancy nor smut/sex/lemon (whatever you wanna call it) into my stories. It's just not my style even if we all know Alec is a hella dom but no fear - you'll def see some scenes get a lil hot and heavy. I am, after all, only human and kissing is fun. Like, really fun. I highly suggest it.
> 
> Your comments are absolute gold and every kudos and bookmark makes my heart soar. As always, your reactions and thoughts keep me sane and I appreciate everyone single one of them.
> 
> Bb: Oh goodness, guess they'll need to hold on tight! I love the perspective Marcus has with her, there's definitely time for that. Thank you for checking in!!!!
> 
> NeverLookBack98: Just you wait ;)
> 
> PrincessKD: Ooo I love all of these thoughts, keep 'em coming! And I know, right! I'm a sucker for that stuff.
> 
> All the best,  
> Ro


	23. Cleopatra

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which shit happens and Heidi and Chelsea mess with Saffiya.

**K** issing Alec was like silence.

The kind of quiet that stirs a drumroll in your soul.

We were the silence of the battlefield, the empty space before the clang of armour and the stillness in the middle of a city just before the dawn. It was New Years Eve, the buzz in the air at the start of the countdown and the first breath you take before the calendar marked a new start. Our silence was hanging upside down on the monkey bars and just closing your eyes…it was freedom.

Mentally, I urged myself to push him away, still upset with him but I found that anger eagerly delving into the kiss. Even if our lives depended on it, I would not have been able to deny his touch, so I surrendered to the feeling. His touch, like the petals of a freshly picked flower tickling my skin. Everywhere his fingers landed — my jaw, my elbow, my waist — sparked an electric shock that exploded from my chest like a firework. It left a lightness in my stomach, heavy as a breath of air.

I was completely and utterly lost in him, his taste, his lips.

Weeks of lingering touches and scattered glances hid within our friendship. Raised voices and slamming doors, contentment in the anger and desire in the loneliness. I caught myself staring at the doors just waiting for him to appear. At night, he was a whisper in my dreams and when I woke, I couldn't not think of him. Not of what he was doing or thinking or wearing — just him. As if I were contemplating his existence in the world we both inhabited. I was consumed by him. I couldn't breathe without —

"Oh my god." I was breathing heavily and though I was more desperate for air than him, Alec's chest was rising and falling in sync with mine. My hands were on his chest, steadying myself as my thoughts zipped back and forth trying to process the moment. Until finally, "oh my god!" I pushed back against his chest and out of his arms. He seemed surprised - either with my sudden retreat or his own actions I couldn't tell, but he obeyed and his hands disappeared from my body. His eyes quickly scanned my body, as if worried he'd hurt me with a kiss. A kiss.

"You kissed me."

A small smirk, on its own accord, replaced the concern and confirmed, "I did."

I smacked his shoulder. "Wh — Why!"

"You didn't like it?" He raised an eyebrow with a teasing tone, as if daring me to deny it.

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to maintain the same calm and regal attitude as I struggled to find a comeback. "What? I didn't — that's not…" I pointed a finger at him, trying to collect myself. "You can't just go around kissing people."

"I'm sorry." The apology was oddly genuine as he continued, "I'll take it back."

"Huh?"

He took two fingers and brushed them over my lips quickly before tapping them on his own. "There. I took it back."

My hand replaced his at my own mouth, and though it was impossible, it did feel as if the ghost of his kiss lingered on my lips. "You can't just take it back."

"Yes, I can."

"No, you can't."

"I just did," he laughed at me. "It's mine, again."

"No." I huffed, wrapping my hands around the soft silk tie that was tucked into his vest and pulling him back down to my mouth.

I lingered. I did. I'll admit it. And the millisecond that I did caused Alec to automatically take hold of my hips so when I pulled away, the shocked expression on his face was only inches from mine. He began toying with the loops on the sides of my jeans, twisting them around his fingers in a secure grip. Our eyes locked and the glow of red in his were growing darker. Only this time, I wasn't so naive to attribute it purely to hunger.

I swallowed, suddenly timid under his heavy gaze. "Now, it's yours." My eyes fell to his lips with the words and as I bit my own, I saw something flash across his eyes.

"Mine," he growled, giving a sharp tug on my jeans and pulling my hips into his.

My body collided with his as we met halfway with a fervent desire, both driven by something we didn't quite understand but knew we could no longer resist. Whatever I was going to say vanished as butterflies escaped my stomach and entered my bloodstream. I became lost in my attempt to protest his words with more than playground retorts.

There were so many things that needed to be said. The bad, the underlying fears, and the innocence associated. These topics hadn't been pushed from my mind. And being so aware, the last thing I should have done was let him kiss me again. But I knew that once they were said aloud, this couldn't happen again. No matter how much I wanted it to. So, I indulged. Selfishly, fatally, euphorically.

My fingers found themselves at the nape of his neck, knotted in his hair. His grip tightened on my hips, holding me close with a cautious note as if to keep himself from forgetting how delicate I was. I tempted these boundaries, tracing my tongue over his lower lip. He squeezed my right hip in an empty warning, and still he grasped control in both himself and the battle we were engaged in.

His fingers briefly flashed by the skin at my navel and I tugged his hair as a natural response, pushing myself closer to him. Emboldened, his teeth scraped my bottom lip and with a gentle nip, a targeted electric pulse bolted through my veins, lighting them on fire. A small whine emanated from my vocal cords and I could feel him smirking at the reaction.

Not one to give in quite so easily, I took the opportunity I'd been presented and pulled a little harder on his hair. I was awarded with my own guttural groan originating from Alec's chest. He broke away in astonishment to see that my power matched his own. He narrowed his eyes as I giggled in triumph, a direct challenge to his dominance.

Also not easily deterred, Alec leaned in again, his breathing bracing against my own as his eyes met mine through the fullness of his lashes. Our faces inches apart, we recycled the air between us, not willing to part for an activity so inconsequential as breathing. With a devilish smirk, Alec took advantage of my pause and gripped my waist, pulling our bodies closer together until space was merely a theory.

I gasped at the impact and instead of returning to our previous activity, Alec brushed the mess of my hair off of my face as I stared up at him, missing the taste of his lips. He traced my cheekbones with two fingers and pressed his lips to my forehead. He took a moment there before whispering against my skin, cherishing the meaning in, "my mate." He said the words as if he couldn't believe they were true. As if the statement alone would bring him happiness for the next thousand years.

But it was the one thing he could have said that would end the moment between us.

He was breathing just as heavily as I was and I think he knew what he had done. Had he done it on purpose, knowing that the comment would ignite a certain response in me or had he gotten what he wanted and was ready to move on? As I quietly questioned his intentions, he kept me close.

Alec watched me through cautious eyes. Yes, he knew as well as I did. There was no avoiding this.

Almost reluctantly, a touch of bitterness coated my throat. "Of all the centuries, of all the women, right?" I began to quote him.

"I don't want anyone else." My stomach fluttered despite the returning of my normal brain functions. I breathed in, not yet willing to pull away from him but I squeezed my eyes shut, too afraid of what I might interpret in his eyes. "Only you. Always you."

I shook my head, his words ringing in my ears like church bells and catapulting me back into reality. All of a sudden, I could feel the caress of his skin against mine become more distinct, no longer stuck behind a haze of fog. I couldn't take it. The purity in his words with the backdrop of unintended damage, but damage none the less, made my chest ache. His words were sweet, but the intimacy in them haunted me.

I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out. He rested his forehead on mine, his lips inches away and I let him, too weak to resist. I needed him, his touch, his faith.

"Saffiya?" His voice nearly broke my heart. All frustration and disgruntled sass had disappeared. I couldn't stop the innate pull to check in with him. My eyes opened and he was already staring at me. He looked at me like a puppy, devoted and naive as concern began to grow on his face the more he observed mine.

I couldn't taste my own words as I used them to close myself in an empty sepulchre. "A…again," I breathed out, still finding my voice. "You said you wouldn't lie to me again."

It was not difficult to note the differences from the first time I'd accused him of lying to me. That annoyingly attractive and conceited smirk that had rested on his face, playfully challenging my claim was nowhere to be found. Instead, it was replaced with a deeper emotion, an internal case of shame and guilt with a loss on how to rectify the damage of his decisions.

I struggled to resist as his hand came up to cup my cheek and his breath washed over me like the morning tide.

"Forgive me," he pleaded in a whisper and I whimpered, unable to retain the height of my anger when he was this close to me. My knees were weak and I was sure that if he let me go, I wouldn't have the strength to hold myself up. I lifted my head to look at him and he observed me through thick lashes. His eyes searched mine for any sign of absolution. In his desire for it, he soothed my uncertain affect by touching his nose to mine. Softly, slowly, his lips found my forehead and with a soft kiss, my body's tension begin to dissipate. In turn, I could feel his chest lose a similar tension caused by mine. His lips fluttered over my eyelids, continuing their exploration of my face and leaving whispering kisses along the curve of my cheekbone. I couldn't remember what I had to say, if I even wanted to say anything.

"Perdonami." He repeated his plea, the Italian tickling my skin. His lips pressed gently at the height of my jaw, directly beneath my ear. They trailed down my jaw, leaving no one kiss as they made their way to the corner of my mouth, tempting me, confusing me. It wasn't his intent, as he asked for forgiveness he may not have deserved. I'm not sure if it was our proximity, or something else I wouldn't yet acknowledge, but I could almost feel the pain radiating off of him.

He whispered something else but my ears were clouded as his lips barely brushed mine with the words. The gesture of intimacy lacked a lustful intention, serving instead to convey the judgement and honesty mixed along the emotions that were at war inside of him. The last thing I wanted was to stoke the emotions that taunted him, but I had to be clear, while I still could be.

"I can't trust you right now."

I found strength in the admission and I gave a soft push against his chest, asking for space in-between us. Unwillingly, he once again followed my silent command and took a full step away from me. He'd step off the world if I requested. It occurred to me then that it was possible I owned him as much as he did me.

"I was trying to protect you." He went to say more but stopped himself, rethinking the words he had already formed. But I knew what he was going to say; 'mate'. The guy wouldn't say it for months and now all of a sudden he couldn't stop reminding me that I was had been claimed.

The mere reminder of the relationship triggered the exact response Alec had attempted to avoid. One of defiance. Defiance against some unknown force that apparently gets to decide who we are supposed to spend the rest of our lives with. The audacity of such a system made my blood boil and I took it out on him.

Automatically, a short laugh came out of me and he was taken aback by the abrupt shift in my behaviour. "You keep saying that, but have you considered that maybe you did all of this for yourself?"

The accusation struck a nerve and he growled unthreateningly at me, "that's not true."

"Maybe not consciously, but did you even think to ask what I wanted?" The prospect of the validity in my statement caught him off guard, taunting him to reconsider his actions and their effect on the world outside of himself.

"What do you want me to say?" Alec snapped, an already exasperated attitude surrounding him. I shot him a glare and slammed my hands on the nearest table because it was a stupid question and he knew it.

"I lost everything just so you could keep me here." Alec's eyes were intensely cautious as my anger began to physically manifest itself. I wondered if he feared what I'd do and I think a part of me wanted him to. "Your very own pet human."

He spoke desperately, but his surety came off more condescending then he obviously intended. "Don't be foolish."

I was already at a point where reason would be useless and Alec wasn't exactly helping anyways. I stifled a scream and reached for an old silver candle holder on the table and whipped it towards his head. He easily dodged it and as I turned away to grab something else, he caught my wrist, turning me back around.

"Stop it." He warned me, "you are going to injure yourself."

I responded quickly, however, raising my hand to his face. He caught it, glaring down at my impetuous behaviour with stern eyes. Somehow, he'd overlooked the availability of my other hand, which collided with his face only a second later in a backhanded, half punch half slap. I heard something crack and while I knew it wasn't his face, I really wished it had been.

"Screw you."

His shock from both the physical and verbal attack gave me the chance to put as much force as I could into pushing against his chest and moving past him. However, as I turned my back on him, he appeared in front of me, blocking my exit. Before I could tell him to get the hell-o out of my way, he pushed me to the side and I dropped at an awkward angle into a forgotten chair. I had no chance to readjust or stand back up because almost immediately, Alec slammed his hands on the arms of the chair and leaned forward. Leaving me with few options but to sit and glare up at him like a child.

"I am aware that this is difficult for you to process." I watched him run his fingers through his hair before he sighed. "Everything I did, I did for you, and perhaps I have also been selfish in my desire to preserve your life." I blinked, utterly shocked and a little impressed that he admitted it. Honestly, it'd been a shot in the dark on my end. However, I couldn't help but wonder just how many hoops he'd jumped through and still expected to jump through to ensure that I kept breathing. It almost made me feel guilty for testing my superhero flying powers with a flimsy bathroom towel and jumping from a very tall tree as a kid.

"I have waited centuries…and I cannot lose you."

My breath caught in my throat. His words were sweet, but it hit me that what I needed was time. Time to think. Time to process my own thoughts and feelings. Because this was…a lot. So, trying to muster the same intensity and independence as I had before, I barely gained the courage to meet his eyes. I swallowed and with a small shake of my head, I denied him.

"I am not yours to lose." A small part of me had meant the words to hurt, to throw him off enough to regain the upper hand but he didn't miss a beat.

"But I am yours."

There was a smouldering intensity in his eyes that sent me soaring and I nearly forgot how to breathe. It seemed that neither of us could find our own footing, much less share equal ground.

Three heavy knocks resonated from the library doors and I jumped at the sound.

"What." Alec barked at the person on the other side, eyes not leaving mine.

Felix slowly opened the door, freezing as he took in our position. He cleared his throat and in an unusually timid tone, he said, "you should know. The entire castle can hear you screaming at each other."

I'd been so focused on Alec that I hadn't even considered the fact that just because we were alone did not mean we were alone. My eyes widened as I wondered exactly what they had heard…or didn't hear.

Alec hardly glanced at Felix. "Is that all?" He asked rudely, impatiently.

Felix's eyes flashed up from the broken candle holder on the floor behind Alec. "The Masters finished deliberating and have requested you in the study."

Alec kept his eyes on my face, hardly acknowledging the other male. "I will be there in a moment."

At the same time, I looked at Felix over my shoulder again. "Deliberating what?"

Felix looked between the two of us awkwardly. When Alec also gave his attention, the vampire answered, "…Heidi wants to show Saffiya her new room, her 'masterpiece'." He included air quotes around the word, gently making fun of Heidi's enthusiasm for interior design.

"Deliberating what?" I asked again and turned in the chair.

Felix again checked in with Alec, who sighed and pushed off the arms of the chair, giving me the room to stand. I crossed my arms expectantly. It was Alec who answered.

"How to win a war."

As we stepped out into the hall, Felix moved to walk beside to me and bent down to whisper in my ear, "scale of 1-10?" He was only teasing, but a trademark growl sounded from behind us.

"None of your business." I rolled my eyes, but I still had no intention of answering the question. I tried to convince myself that the question wasn't about the…thing that happened, but I had a hard time winning that argument with myself. Felix pouted at the missing gossip, but he dropped it.

They escorted me the rest of the way to my room, outside of which Heidi was standing and checking her nails.

"Finally!"

Alec avoided eye contact with me as Felix ruffled my hair and the two men went on their way. Heidi raised her eyebrows.

"As juicy as that looked," everyone in this castle had way too much time on their hands if Alec and I were the only gossip. "It can wait because…" She pushed open the doors as if they weighed nothing and held up arms out like a ringmaster introducing his circus.

"Ta da!"

The room was lovely. A canopy bed, a beautiful vanity, and a new love seat took up most of the attention. I cannot honestly say it looked much different than before because I couldn't fully remember it. After all, I hadn't spent much time inside it. This time, though, it did feel more personal and homey, and it was definitely better than before. There was a chess set in front of the bookshelf wall, which she'd kept. The rest of the walls were changed and were by far, my favourite addition.

Heidi saw me looking at the side wall and grinned, "Chalk wallpaper." She pointed to a basket on the ground in front of it. "Hope you don't mind, but I left it open for the others to come in and write you some messages already."

Scattered across the wall were signatures by some members of the guard. A few had drawn pictures or written a little 'hi Saffiya!' message near their names. Even some that had barely spoken two words past their date of creation. I spotted Jane and Alec's names side by side, as well as surprisingly enough, Caius's, a little further away from the twins'. Aro's was front and center and even Marcus had written something in tiny writing. I decided I would read them all later and give Heidi the praise and attention she deserved.

"You may have to do a bit of damage control every once in a while," she nodded her head to a newly erased circle next to Demetri's name. Not far away, Felix's name had a smile next to an arrow that pointed towards the empty white space. I could only imagine what he'd drawn.

"How did you—"

"You seemed to enjoy helping me draw on my walls, so I thought I'd give you a fun new medium to—" I threw my arms around her waist, hugging her stone body.

She patted my back awkwardly, "you like it, then?" I gave her space.

"Heidi, it's amazing. Thank you." For as long as I could remember, I'd never had my own room to decorate. My father and I often moved from downtrodden hotel to luxury hotel, repeating that pattern in each new city. The nuns lived simply and while I enjoyed a few simple exceptions to that standard, I found I didn't need much anyways.

"You've also got an entire new wardrobe. Complete with castle-appropriate outfits, modern wear, historical costumes, gala dresses, etcetera, etcetera." She sat on the armchair of the loveseat as I stepped into the doorway of the walk-in closet. It was so large it had a bench in the center with two turnoff hallways. Heidi continued, "oh! And club wear."

I spun around and rolled my eyes at the last one. "Because that turned out so well before."

"In my defence, I had hoped it would get Alec to confess his feelings for you." She shrugged and leaned back, "so maybe it backfired a little."

"A little," I commented, more miffed about the mention of Alec than the event from weeks ago.

Ignoring her quip at Alec only seemed to encourage Heidi's curiosity. "When you're no longer a pathetic, defenceless human—"

"Thanks?"

"He'll probably get turned on by it."

I choked on air. "Oh my god." Heidi giggled as I spun on my heels and retreated further into the closet.

A knock sounded on the door and Heidi shouted, "come in," through her laughter.

Another pair of heels joined the echoes of the room. "I thought I heard the little human." The voice sounded like Chelsea, but there was no way I was going out to check.

Not one to get particularly lost in clothing, I retreated to a bench in the center of the closet and plopped down on it, crossing my arms across my chest.

I could still hear them chatting. "She's hiding."

"Or she's simply lost in that maze you call a closet."

Much to my dismay, Heidi didn't even defend her accomplishment but rather continued on. "I mentioned lover boy and she got all flustered. It's adorable."

"Did you tell her about the lingerie?" The suggestive nature of her voice only made my embarrassment grow.

I felt my mouth part and I scanned the walls, finally resting them on a section separate from the undergarments that showcased a lacy, black and red 'number' above several drawers that I could only assume held similar items.

I gave a small yelp, which made the two women immediately burst into a round of giggles at my expense. I grabbed the hanger off the wall and stormed out of the closet doors with it, tossing it at Heidi's face.

I pointed at the two of them, casually lounging on the loveseat. "I'm sixteen. You should be ashamed."

Chelsea tutted, sweeping her hair over her shoulder. "Sweetie, in Alec's day, you would've already been married with kids." I gagged.

"Or a prospective bride."

I snarked back, "what would that make you two?"

"Touchy, isn't she."

"Well, it's a wonder why." They fell into another fit of laughter.

I turned and shoved an empty vase on a table beside the closet doors, which didn't move an inch. I paused and pushed it again, a little harder.

"Caius insisted we fix the expensive items in their place. Just in case." I rubbed the side of my head in embarrassment, which Heidi saw as an opening to what she really wanted to talk about. "Which, from the sounds coming from the library, was a good idea."

"You run a bit hot, don't you?"

They were right. I'd always had a bit of an impulsive temper, which was apparently not unusual for someone with my condition. Though, I'd never experienced emotions quite as intensely as I did where Alec was concerned. And the fact that Caius had had the foresight to tell Heidi to glue stuff to the tables just so I wouldn't break them in a fit was slightly more mortifying than the lingerie.

I tried to be an adult about the inevitable conversation. "No offence. But I really don't want to talk about this right now."

It didn't work.

"It just wasn't exactly the response we all expected."

I groaned and sat at the vanity while they generated gossip.

Chelsea nodded, agreeing with Heidi. "We knew you'd be mad. I told him to tell you weeks ago."

"We all did." Heidi insisted heroically, "Felix and Demetri nearly let it slip about fifteen times in the first week alone." Now, how in the hell did I miss that?  
Chelsea cut Heidi off, recognizing the beginnings of a rant on the two men's theatrics. "Anyways, you were just a wee bit angrier then we were prepared for."

I bit. "Why does that surprise you?"

The women looked at each other before carefully choosing their words in answering me. "It's just that Alec sort of has this way with women—"

"Oh my god." I turned to go back into the closet, not wanting to know where they were going with this fun new direction.

Heidi zipped over to me, guiding me to the sofa to sit in the small space between her and Chelsea. "All we mean is that he's particularly charming - even for a vampire."

"It's to your credit that you stood up to him."

I remembered Alec's words and the sincerity in them and the conflict that still ran inside me. While I was confident in the validity of my reaction, I wavered at the memory. "So, you don't think I'm being unfair?"

Heidi began to play with my hair pointlessly. "Maybe a tad. But he deserves it."

Chelsea chimed in, "Aro gives him everything on a silver platter. The boy hasn't heard the word 'no' since he was a newborn."

The other woman tucked my hair behind my ear, agreeing with her friend. "Plus, angry sex is fantastic." She joked, tossing me back the lingerie. I fumbled with it before letting it fall to the floor.

I squinted and quickly stood. "I need a shower."

They laughed me all the way into the bathroom. I was 100% positive that if they could still drink, they'd be wine at 9 ladies.

I glanced in the mirror as I turned on the shower and realized that my non-dominant hand, which had hit Alec's rock hard vampire body only a short while ago, was hanging weakly at the wrist. I'd completely forgotten about it and I was lucky no one else had noticed. They'd all make a big fuss over something that I could handle in five minutes.

Everyone here already thought I was a violent freak. I didn't want to give them even more evidence to support that theory.

To Heidi's credit, the bathroom cupboards were stocked with all the essentials — enough to wait out the zombie apocalypse. She had, however, not included the one thing I used more than my floss — crepe bandages. Which wasn't actually surprising seeing as they were all so overly cautious about not injuring me that I'd had less injuries in my time at the castle than in my entire life.

My shower forgotten, I wandered through a side door in the bathroom and into the closet. Heidi had her quirks, but she definitely had an eye for convenience in design. I was able to find both suitable nightwear and a t-shirt that easily doubled as a mock bandage wrap. I knew I had some extras in my bag, but it was nowhere to be found.

Although Chelsea and Heidi's giggles had disappeared, it seemed I still wasn't left alone. Alec stood in front of the chalk wall, reading the messages left by his fellow guard members.

"Don't you knock?"

Grateful that I'd picked an outfit with both long sleeves and pockets, I subtly hid my injured hand in the fabric of my clothing. The only person I dreaded finding out about it more than Alec, was his sister. Although I couldn't exactly determine why, Alec was a close second. Though I was surprised the crack in the air had slipped his overprotective, detail-oriented mind. Until I realized that my never getting hurt also meant that my guards hadn't heard my bones crack or smelled burning flesh or any other clues that were used to determine when I should've been in pain. Though, I had no doubt they had all cracked a few bones in their day, so I let it go before it drove me mad. Besides, I had other things to worry about.

Nerves erupted in my stomach as Alec turned around to face me, so I quickly made my way over to sit at the vanity. I picked up a brush placed elegantly to the side with my non-injured hand and took a deep breath. I had to settle my stomach before it notified my heart to pick up its' pace.

"I have been given a mission." I stared straight ahead into the mirror, trying to pretend like he didn't exist. To be honest, I wasn't quite sure how to react. Heidi and Chelsea's teasing came to mind but I quickly squashed the embarrassing reminder. "Aro retrieved Razin's last known location from his minion's mind," he continued.

When I still didn't acknowledge the information, frustration carried his voice across the room. "You're angry, you've made that quite clear." Honestly, I wasn't sure what I was at the moment. I definitely wasn't as angry as I was before, but I doubt that even with a hot shower that I would be completely calmed down. But I wasn't about to fill him in. "Have you nothing to say?"

I don't know what he wanted me to say, and a dozen sassy comments flowed through my head before I chose one with less spite. "Why are you telling me?" I watched in the mirror as he stopped in front of the door, staring down at his Italian black leather shoes.

"Last time I left without saying goodbye, you were upset with me." I pursed my lips at this, because I couldn't fault him for sharing this with me if I'd been slightly bothered when he hadn't told me before. It seemed so long ago that he'd up and disappeared alone on a 'mission' to a location he still had not disclosed, but I appreciated the gesture no matter how frustrated I was with him now.

I couldn't quite gather the courage to turn and face him and I heard an exasperated sigh pass through his lips. But, all I could muster was a soft, "okay."

There was slight pressure on my temple and my eyes flashed to the mirror in front of me to see Alec tenderly giving me his own goodbye. My eyes fluttered closed, missing the touch that I'd barely spent any time without. As his lips left my forehead, he met my eyes in the mirror and I quickly turned away, feeling a wave of self-consciousness surround me.

"I will return soon." As much as I would've sworn I hated him at that moment, I couldn't help but worry — only a little. Because what if he didn't come back? What if this time was different?

"Alec!" I stood abruptly, almost knocking the chair I'd just vacated onto the floor. Alec was paused with his hand on the doorknob, waiting patiently for me to say whatever I was going to say.

I faltered, before saying the best thing I could think of. "Don't die?"

His face softened, but he only nodded. And then he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeet.
> 
> Thank you to everyone for all of your support and thank you for reading!
> 
> A heads up that you may notice the cover for this story changing over the next few days or so. I'm super attached to the original one so it will probably return, but I just want to try some new things. Let me know if you like any of the new covers, they're also temporary and unedited for the most part so we're just experimenting :)
> 
> yours and more,
> 
> Ro
> 
> P.S. The title of the chapter is a reference to the 1962 film starring Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. If you don't know the story of Liz and Dick, go look them up. A little tribute since I missed Valentine's day :)


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